Am I happy
One part of my brain asks another
Let me check it replies
It sorts through something
I Endeavor to maintain
And never admit to or name

Having run some calculation
And come up with a sum

I say myself with a good
Or bad hum

For the interval just passed
you were gassed

I am in this design
in time
feathery
ethereal
feral
glad
squirming against
my imagination's
ya'll

I'm in this envelope
of time
30 seconds bang
and here I go again

Once again I discover
that I am trying to render
myself unconscious
with a palliative device

this is the downhill side
of my chair's revolution now
ninety degrees to the left
and I'm on top of the world

I never hear anything
until much later
like years much later
why is that
I'm listening

Leave this alone
indelibly burned
onto the fragile
crystalline film
of my pride

And then I don't