Thrown and thrown and thrown once again
To the wind
That blows in the heavens
A day in the life of many young searchers
For fame
Waiting to be grasped
Try as they might to catch the stars
In the black bulging space
Their toil will eventually be rewarded
Stride forward fearless on the back of fear
Resisting the failure
That snaps and bites their ankles
Destiny hovers and ducks and weaves
Seemingly impossible
But the strong will catch their dreams

Full of life and emotion
I am like an ocean
With rocks in my depths
And the occasional hidden wrecks
I am calm in the sun
Relaxed and full of fun
But I am cold in the rain
When the water takes my brain
When I capsize from my boat
Through the clouds I like to float
Seeking dreams like we all do
Not just for me but also for you
Sometimes sulky a childlike disposition
Means my growing up is still in transition
But I do believe in good
Which I think we all should
I’m balanced but complex as you see
But that’s my vessel my soul my me

A light shone into my eyes
Contempt became pity
Guilt replaced hunger
Fear overcame my stride

Whistles slivered into my ears
And nestled amongst my thoughts
We had found you at long last
But a voice inside whispered set them free

I tried to ignore it with strained guile
The seven seas I had travelled
To exact my revenge
Seemed wasted and empty dreams

Cowardice had overcome me
Crept into my bones like ice
Shrouding me like a blanket
Rigid and strong and eternal

Screams and jeers sailed over me
The axe I saw gleaming in the sun
Tears dropped from my closed shivering eyes
Then dark the light then peace

Do I still just say hello
To this world that I should know
Can I act so very sincere
When my mind isn’t that clear
Will I drink from the fateful cup
And see my thoughts trip me up
Or is a cloud going to grey
Which will soak me to decay
Before a sun shines in my vision
Protecting me from derision
Guiding my noctural mind
From a life that can be unkind
Bringing me back onto this earth
For the purposes of my rebirth

****** corona virus
What a waste of time
I have to miss my yoga session
And that’s just a crime
My husband works in the commons
Whilst I work as a lawyer
I am extremely extremely angry
The local Waitrose has no soya
My husband has missed his bowls game
And little Tarquin can’t play polo
As for the trip to the opera
It appears I’m going solo
Of course I won’t criticise the government
They keep us in good wealth
Maybe one point now though
Is what’s happening to our health
We probably won’t go to St Tropez
Did you know we’re from Surrey
I’ll just arrange a dinner party
After all we’ve got plenty of money

Through the lens
I view the world in its glory
There are no fakes here
It’s the real story
As it beckons me forward
And takes my hand
I gloriously enter
The optical land
Snapping away
Fast and slow
This inglorious ******* reveals
What the people need to know
I am the watcher
The stalker in the dark
Hiding behind dustbins
And the trees in the park
I’m hated and despised
It’s the nature of the beast
In a world so hypocritical
Through the headlines they feast
The truth is all I’m selling
And I know im no one’s fan
But you’ll never ever stop me working
I was born a paparazzi man

Down by the river
And across the grass
Where the cows roam
And the ramblers pass
Sits my house
A small decrepit thing
Like a humming bird
With a broken wing
Two rooms up
And three rooms down
There’s barely enough space
For my dressing gown
But I like it really
Cause I’m a bit of a loner
The simple mess
Fits my persona
Nobody comes
And nobody goes
Except the wind
That frequently blows
Now off you go
And don’t come back
If you follow me again
I’ll give you a smack

The thunderclap roar of a distant storm
Stirs my senses in the silent dorm
Lifting my legs over the metallic frame
The cold jolt I feel is always the same
As my tiny feet touch the icy floor
I cautiously look towards the shadowy door
Sound is lost like a soul in limbo
So I carefully tiptoe to the rain dowsed window
The street below is dark and foreboding
Creating the feeling that the world is corroding
I dream of daddy and mother together
Kissing me goodnight from the land of nether
A car flies past illuminating the room
Revealing the walls of this miserable tomb
Teardrops fall onto my ***** nailed hand
And I wipe them away every time they land
Praying God hears me before I go to heaven
Hoping for a little love to me orphan 7

My feet are burning in the golden sands
The sun is quietly corroding my skin
Dreaming of a life which I deserve
And a life that you have to be in
Without you my desires are tatters
If your not close to me I might as well go
To a place where my soul remains
Trapped and breaking very slow
I’m not asking for ****** deliverance
Or to be showered by protection and affection
Just for you to be in the same world as mine
Would be heaven and a soulful connection
They say believing is painful and long
I agree as it’s took so long to see
But finding you amongst periods of nothingness
Makes it clear you were delivered for me

Hello dear happiness
I wonder how you found me
On this day of imperial dread
I never sought your help
Quite the opposite to tell the truth
As I spent the day in bed
Like the serpent as it invaded Adams garden
You just slithered in
Without a pardon
And as I flittered my tired eyes
The warmness of your softening skin
Was a welcoming surprise
So thank you dear happiness
As I cuddle you closely
On this morning of bright sunshine
And as I hold you even tighter
The world outside
Now seems beautiful and lighter

It has brought us together
Like birds of a feather
The adhesive stuff
Very very clever
They call it the glue of love

It so subtly applies
In a world full of flies
Working through the lies
Very very clever
They call it the glue of love

Hidden behind faces
Finding all the spaces
Hitting tender places
Very very clever
They call it the glue of love

It’s finds you
Cause it needs to
Firming as it flows through
Very very clever
They call it the glue of love

Like a dragons breath upon a sleepy village
Imperious, loathing and full of hate
The black and suffocating evil smoke
Floods effortlessly under the garden gate
Screams of the past roar and echo
With every flame that lights up the sky
A thousand memories slowly fade way
Into the world that imprisons all that die
Between the falling beams and shimmering glass
Lonely souls see an end to their isolation
The rut they’ve all shared in endless limbo
Now erodes and brings thankful salvation
They silently weave through the alive and now
Who omit sweat and wear human skin
This was the street where they once walked
As they await a new chapter to begin
The house burns ablaze like a furnace
Like witches the ancients made the people loathe
A fallen beauty once of majestic dwelling
The house that lived along Cedar Grove

Who are you man?
That voice in my head
Who spouts vile garbage
While I’m asleep in my bed

Telling me I’m ugly
Telling me I’m fat
Telling me I’m stupid
I refuse to believe that

Who are you man?
Corrupting my day
Take your ******* words
And please go away

Telling me I’m worthless
Telling me I’m bland
Telling me I’m boring
From a distant land

Who are you man?
Dragging me there
Just sail away now
Cause I really don’t care

I’ll tell you this
I’ll tell you that
I’ll tell you I’m not listening
To your nonsense chat

The little girl dances
Under the branch’s of the willow
And every time she feels the leaves
She remembers lowering the pillow

Dancing through the forest
Where the roses form like blood
She sniffs the scented open petals
And gently removes her hood

Along the rocks of the river
She lies down under the sun
Remembering how she took his life
A ****** just for fun

A troubled soul since childhood
Left in the minds of the ill
No matter how strong she put up the fight
She was taken against her will

But now she has her moment
And now she takes her turn
She runs across the grassy valley
To catch her uncle on her return

Through the streets her feet run
Into the school gates
And there as the bell begins to ring
She watches and she waits

The clouds fly overhead
And the birds dob up and down
Then she stabs him through the chest
He falls with a frown

Then she runs towards the road
Anticipating the next ****
He’s the one who makes it complete
The father in law she knew as Bill

Matches on fire
Oh why do I watch
My brother the liar
Swirling his crotch
To inspecting girls
Beautiful faces
Perfected curls
All dresses and laces
You for me
And you for him
How good it will be
A promise so slim
I don’t want cast offs
Or my brothers choosing
Smart *** toffs
I’m already loosing
But carry on he will
Flirting and petting
It all makes me ill
My picked one is fretting
My brother is a fool
So now I’m going home
This isn’t cool
I’m not in Rome
Where you do as they do
I life my own life
I’m thinking *******
As I spot his wife

I’m blissfully aware of the beauty
That tumbles from the sky
Heavy drops of liquid rain
Make me want to cry
I’m fully in tune with nature
From the trees to a buzzing bee
As a wave crashes across a rock
A chrysalis sets a butterfly free
I absorb the heat from the sun
As it’s rays unravel my skin
Making the pale to red
On the vessel that my bones are in
And lastly I ponder the stars
That sparkle and burn in the night
Shooting and fizzing through the dark
They leave my head in wonder and delight

High up and nestling in the clouds
Is a house made just for me
And when comes the day
For me to leave this coil
I will fly upwards for a cup of tea

I will peer down eagerly from way up high
And watch the world in full stride
As the birds sing
Whilst the living play
I’ll feel warm and tingly inside

Maybe I might pay a visit occasionally
Just to say a quick hello
With a little reveal
Or tap on the door
That way I’m sure they’ll know

New York as a state
Ain’t so great
Big cars big food
So ****** rude
Billy Joel
He’s swell
High serendipity
Statue of Liberty
Broadway success
Cats is the best
Helicopter ride
Long Island tide
Manhattan subway
Taxis giveaway
Become a star
With a cigar
Apple that’s big
Central Park dig
Broad walk creeps
City doesn’t sleep
Razzmatazz
Alcatraz
Christopher Street
Gay retreat
New York Jets
Giants like nets
Studio 54
Not there no more
An addict dies
Skyscrapers rise
New York New York
All just talk

Throw the scraps out
So the rats can have a feast
Of fried chicken and cooked ham
A sausage roll from an infants pram
Left for dead on a flattened kerb
A turkey sandwich with a sprinkled herb
Hungry old foxes will eat

Throw the scraps out
For cats to smell
Donner meat and spindly chips
Jaffa orange all peel and pips
*** noodles and microwave meals
Caviar under BMW wheels
For birds to dine on

Throw the scraps out
Feed the mice
Corn on the cob with butter on top
Honey combs from a bees stop
Bird seed under a scarecrows smile
Cabbage and swede from the vegetable pile
For weasels to run away with

Workplace is catty
Smelly and ratty
Shop floor a bore
Fun is no more
Park is full of the unwell
And the rats bad as well
Tv is laced with dull
Desperate people trying to pull
Transport is long and sleepy
Life is tiresome and weepy
Pubs are a dying breed
Councils dissect with their greed
Music is all shout and chains
Droning with aches and pains
Dates are internet and vile
Mug shots all edit and fake smile
Streets are unfriendly through fear
Self loathing and violence for the year
Traditions and morals up the spout
Thoughts on paper when nothing comes out
Friends stay close and tight knit
Lose them and then that’s it
Burn out and join the line
To our nations drastic decline

Head hidden in his hood
He’s in there somewhere
Underneath the skin and blood
Awaiting learning and special care
Lies a brain full of thoughts
A mind crammed with dreams
But with more crosses than noughts
All bursting at the seams

Head hidden in his hood
He’s in there somewhere
Operating differently than he should
The ignoramus persons nightmare
A boy of few words
Whose actions speak a bit more
Like buffalos running in a herd
He brings destruction to the floor

Head hidden in his hood
He’s in there somewhere
The eyes work like a spy’s would
Impossible hearing behind the stare
Don’t be fooled by his quiet
He’s smarter than you and me
Capable of a mini riot
My boy little Master C

Cars and then more cars
Bikes and then more bikes
People and thankfully people
Milling around the city

Bars and then more bars
Takeaways and then more takeaways
Life and thankfully life
Milling around the city

Through Chinatown
The man wears a gown
And makeup and a wig
On the way to his gig
As a drag queen

The Museum
Full of glass
Housing the past
Where the young to the last
Stare in wonder

Rivers and canals
Flowing under bridges
Glistening brown and murky
Keeps me a little perky
As dog walkers study the depths

Street lights and sirens
Smells of exotic foods
Tempting to the thought of eating
Like lions upon a herds meeting
Nothing can compare

Music loud and booming
From the clubs along the streets
As we dance the night away
While time leads us astray
I love my days in the city

Bricks in my head
Magazines in my bed
Food on the floor
Mice at the door
Eviction letter
Neighbours feel better
Out of work blues
Doesn’t make news
Job seekers money
Isn’t very funny
Alcohol for relief
Lost my belief
Reality tv
*** noodle for tea
Doctors appointment
Families disappointment
Circles getting vicious
Nicotine is delicious
Close to breaking
All my own making
Finally had enough
Soon be sleeping rough
Sneak away as the taxi waits
Creep on a boat heading to the states

Who’d be a father or a mother today
In this world of encapsulating madness
Trying to wrestle your mind away
From the enigma
That is sons and daughters

The age of light and of water and of night
The age of space and of electric and of flight
The age of thinking and of hearing and of sight
The age of genius

The age of simplicity and of size and of ease
The age of medicine and of cures and of disease
The age of voices and of beauty and of ******
The age of genius

The age of seeing and of equality and of ponder
The age of creativity and of new and of wonder
The age of rain and of sun and of thunder
The age of genius

The age of storms and of eruptions and of tide
The age of extinction and of death and of pride
The age of faith and of spirit and of inside
The age of genius

A thrill
The chill
Crawls up my back
The breeze
In the trees
Makes me jump
The fright
Of the night
Scares us to death
Oh shame
Above our name
When we run for the gate
We talk
As we walk
Away from the old graveyard

A fat lady comes and sits down
On a seat in my booth
She glares at me above her spectacles
Its a bit surreal to tell the truth

I turn and stare out the window
As she pulls out a large cream bun
And I slowly hear the uneducated sounds
Off it gliding in her mouth down to her tum

Then she throws her head back
Against the large upholstered seat
And as I notice her swelling belly
I wonder how she finds her feet

She starts to snore loudly
As I stifle a little giggle
Then she jerks a bit to quickly
Before slumping again with a wriggle

My mind races over time
Wondering where the hell she’s actually going
Falling asleep after devouring a cake
What tale am I not knowing

And then she talks unearthly
Shouting in her sleep
I hate that man, I hate that man
What secret does she keep

The train pulls into the platform
And this my last stop
But the fat lady just keeps on snoring
With her belly about to the pop

Am I the possessed
Or am I the possession
Am I the jury
Or the court in full session
Am I the important letter
Or the stamp that makes it go
Am I the hardback book
Or the words that make it flow
Am I the shimmering sea
Or the fish that live below
Am I the clear blue sky
Or the sun that loves to glow
Am I the yellow daffodils
Or the honey made by the bee
Am I the fronting facade
Or am I just me

I drank the wine
From my lovers glass
And I secretly prayed
It wasn’t my last

She cleverly told me
I was still her friend
But in reality
It felt like the end

I put down my drink
And said my goodbye
Then noticed her tears
Why did she cry

I’m so very sorry
Was the words she exclaimed
Which led to a reawakening
As my passions inflamed

And then we made love
So beautiful and true
Then came those dreaded words
You know l don’t love you

The man in pale light
Transparent like a hologram
He stood

I blinked

Once

A thousand times

Of seeing the impossible and clear misunderstood

Why are you showing yourselves to me
Is it just cause you think you can
What message are you trying to relay to me
And why

Do I remind of a soul from your day

Do I look

Like a person

You once knew

Is limbo so cold and scary
Do feel you need to speak
Are you sins embedded so acutely
That you exist
A supernatural freak

Where have you gone
Who’s stole you fire
I’m not scared or falling to the floor

I just feel a sense of curiosity

As I turn

And head back home

Into the torn trilby upright stands a feather
Hiding hair enthused with dirt and a touch of woodland heather
Blood shot eyes look tired and heavily sunken
From the bottled spirits that the mouth has frequently drunken
A Scarf hangs down which was once so beautifully green
Hard to envisage it when it was vibrant, pristine and so clean
Rivers of blood dribble down a grey woolly chin
From tins and cans creeping out of an overflowing bin
Hidden clothes under mould spots and wretched smells
A heart that’s barely alive miraculously somehow still dwells
On cardboard is scribbled a beg for food and change
Well worded and well meant but with a hint of subtle derange
Humanity shuffles past like ghosts lost in time
Rejecting and ignoring his pleas for help, attention and social climb
Stuck in a painful slumber and thinking what could have been
A ***** is now a figurine derived from a portrait made from the obscene

From cradle to the grave
I feel like your protector
Like a roof above a house
I won’t let trouble ever effect her
The sadness that wells inside
When you tell me of your simple woes
How I manage to keep my head
God only knows

From the cot to your house
I keep a subconscious eye
Like a psychic bringing foretold futures
I do this to the day I die
Nobody will ever hurt you
While I’m living in my skin
As I tread this strange life path
Your care I will hold therein

Failure
What does it mean
Falling short
Or not doing enough
The worst that’s ever been

Failure
It’s a ******
You feel low
And your energies gone
Like rain coming down in summer

Failure
Where does it end
You see no hope
Cause your hearts not in it
It drives you round the bend

Coughing and laughing
In the mouth and out the mouth
******* the stick fast and slow
Smokers of the world I understand you  
Don’t feel shame and don’t feel bad
Cause you feel you smoke to cope
It’s not all about that really
It’s a pleasure and a release
A fun tool when in company
Yes it can still **** and **** it still can
But treat it with moderation
Don’t abuse its powerful pull
Just treat it like a friend
Don’t have sixty cause that’s just greed
Certainly don’t have eighty
Cause your wallets will bleed
Just have maybe two
And when in company maybe five or four
Smoking isn’t a curse
Or a society nuisance
It’s just life and it’s furniture
Nothing more and nothing less

We danced amongst the daffodils
And mingled with the scents
Our nostrils were strangely ambushed
By the flower garden through the fence
A timeless little treasure trove
All hidden behind the house
And then we played hide and seek
Using our cunning and all our nouse
I hid down on the river bank
Behind a large crooked tree
Listening to your heavy footsteps
As you playfully tried to find me
And then all became eerily silent
The smell of burning hung in the air
You had gone and completely disappeared
To a place I still don’t know where
Thirty years on from that day
I sit in my own wandering mind
Wondering who took you from me
To face the loneliness and hurt left behind
I never give up hope
A kindred spirit doesn't really leave
I’ll just keep my fingers crossed
And not allow myself to stop or believe

In the gutters stir the rats
Black as the night and fat as cats
Running through gardens
With no beg your pardons

Feeding on the debris folk leave behind
Like half eaten chicken legs and bacon rind
Vermin that camouflage in with the night
Aimless minds with no plan in sight

Through tunnels all dark and over flowing
With excrement that’s shows no signs of slowing
Long noses and curling whip like tails
Who is it who puts the wind in your sails

Misunderstood? A nasty creation
Is it true your the devils relation
In the shadows the rats like to roam
Through the grime and filth they believe to be home

I walked through the shadows
Not all of them were death

I walked through angels
With bitterness in my breath

I walked through humanity
Confused of wrong and right

I walked through space
Like a star in the night

I walked through dream land
Crawling on hands and knees

I walked through dimensions
Looking for the keys

I walked through people
Feeling all their pain

I walked through myself
Hiding in the rain

I walked through nature
Buoyant and full of zest

I walked through peace
And laid myself to rest

I watch my wife swim
As she cuts through water like a knife
And remember my privets need a trim
She’s done breast stroke all her life
A champion in the blue
But a disaster in the household
I guess it’s something Ive always knew
If truth be told
Watching her frolic in the water
Doing length after length after length
I realise family ignorance
Is possibly her biggest strength
She smiles at the young men
Don’t recall her smiling at me
I just take her at nine thirty in the morning
And pick up her up at twenty past three
Today it’s all going to change
Cause today I’m going for broke
Whilst I arrange our divorce
She’ll carry on doing the breast stroke

Page completely empty
Waste bin completely full
Nothing is coming through
No magic can I pull
Standing and walking around
Sipping lemon tea
Why can’t I put down a line
Why is this happening to me
Talk to me oh brain
Give just one solitary thought
Just a little bit of a tale
Instead of endless nought
I think I need to escape the house
Somewhere I can take stock
I’ll take a stroll to the local pub
And try and cure my writers block

There you go
My busy little one
Fluttering those wings
Under the sun

On slate on bark
And all manner of things
Chewing on samples
That nature aways brings

Consuming worms and seeds
Through soil and heather
Release those feathers
Whatever the weather

I’ve seen this before
A long long time ago
But I’ll watch it anyway
Cause I like it
Word for word
Scene for scene
And that bit where that happens
Brilliant

I’ve not seen this one
But everyone else has
So I’m pleased I’m watching it
Cause I missed it
First time round
Whilst at work
When all the world discussed it
Frustrating

I’ve forgot about this one
It just escaped my mind
Which isn’t like me
I usually remember everything
Especially funny episodes
Which make me laugh
And pull me in
Thankful

I didn’t like this one
It was pretty crap
Even for me
And I’m quite tolerant
But I’ll watch it again
Cause it seems better now
And I’m enjoying it more
Re-runs

My dog is lovely
I love my dog
Until it did a mess
On top of my bog
It didn’t say sorry
Which made me mad
So I did something
I know was bad
I took its *****
Not literally mind
And threw them out
Which wasn’t kind
That day I felt guilty
From my head to my feet
Maybe he didn’t mean to
Do a mess on my seat
So I went to the pet shop
And bought my dog a bone
Afterwards I shown him photos
On my iPhone
We were friends for a short time
Then he became a pest
But the final straw came last night
When he did a mess all over my chest

Welcome to the cheap seats
All tattered with brownish rust
Welcome to the cheap seats
Filled with memories of teenage lust
Welcome to the cheap seats
How time as removed their skin
Welcome to the cheap seats
A mere shadow of how they begin
Welcome to the cheap seats
The workers choice of viewing
Welcome to the cheap seats
Full of sweets that they were chewing

Like ghosts in the night
Sailing through the wind
Roaming and moaning
About the times when we sinned
Never quite at peace
Searching for the shore
Desperate to leave the water
To sleep for ever more
Why do we never find sanctuary
Our souls waiting to maroon
We crossed into dangerous waters
Hastily and much to soon
Let’s sing our song together
Holding hands in the dimming light
A sweet smile we give to each other
As we tip toe along in the night
A kiss from now and the past
Blessed but never forgotten
I remember how things once were
Before the troubled became the rotten

Beneath the clouds
All vegetable on the rocks
He resides
From human eyes

Large and still
And ignored by the gulls
Only seen by a few
Between dimensions old and new

Phantoms are not all human
Or hairy cats and dogs
Some dwell under the winds chorus
Like the ghost of the singing walrus

Often mistaken for the crashing waves
Heard by the sailors while at sea
The walrus bellows its beautiful sound
Like a waterfall hitting the ground

One day the walrus will find the light
And slip to somewhere new
But for now as the earth spins along
The walrus will forever sing it song

Hello love bird
Where have been hiding lately
I missed you down at the bar
Shining so brightly

Hello love bird
Why did you leave so soon
I wanted to talk like we used to
When the world used to stop

Hello love bird
Do you remember me now
I would love us to get together
One day soon

So pure yet immature
Wrong time when premature
Struggling for oxygen that isn’t there
For the eye it’s an emotional affair
Falls down stumbles round
Lifts up and hits the ground
Wheezes little breezes
Conjures up little sneezes
Throws out a lame gentle moan
Which evolves ever slowly into a groan
Nestled in bed made of print
Underneath the brambles and the flint
Cold wraps around this precious soul
Missing warmth like fires burnt with coal
Hands raise up the abandoned vessel
Into a thick blanket the orphan can know nestle

Sat under the bridge
She watched the river
All reeds and ***** water
Nostalgically thinking
Of childhood dreams
And lessons the world had taught her
Chewing on a sandwich
From inside a packet
The freedom was running strong
Remembering school
And friends long gone
She burst into a song
Word for word
And line for line
It made her body sway
A song she loved
That took her back
Would get her through the day
Laying back
Eyes closed
She took a sip from a bottle
Smoking a ***
Whilst drinking beer
Her mind was in full throttle
Just one kiss
A little touch
Was all she wanted in this life
Everything was gone
Her world in ruins
Another beaten wife