My lips don't move
My voice makes no sound
My heart is screaming
To have you around

My eyes are pleading
My hands are reaching
My mind is breaking
To hold your ghost again

My throat is swelling
My tears are falling
My ego is faltering
To hold against your offense

My body has gotten up
My determination is boiling
My anger is blazing
To not be dropped by you again

My addiction has faded
My symptoms have withdrawn
My soul is healing
To show you're not my drug anymore

I wish I was a lifeguard

   So I could save myself

        From drowning under your gaze

               And resuscitate my heart

                      As it beats its last murmur

                               And hums your name

I think about you
    And it's weird
           I wish I could read into your thoughts
                And see if we're on the same wavelength
                      But with my luck, it all I'm sure falls short
                             Nothing but self-consciousness
                                    Because I'm me, and I always fall short
                                          I don't like the feelings, they make me feel weak
                                   Vulnerable
                                                                         Scared
                                                     Scattered
         The facade may crumble, exposing broken pieces and failing parts
                                          Oh, how I wish it would

you're aching, and tragicly breaking.
living your life in dispair.
your praying, and you're waiting,
for someone who doesnt care,
he was never really there.

you're burning, and you're yearning,
for him to come through,
stop wasting all your time on him,
and just start loving you.

I know I'm not alone
It's a given
I've got friends by my side
Alliances that will not shatter or rust

But loneliness attacks the heart, the soul
Not anyone can fill that gap
And when pieces are mercilessly ripped out
And the heart is left with gaping holes
You start to wonder if anyone can fill it

I long for those holes to be patched up
Whole, but never perfect
Eighteen years with the life of thirty
Clinging to happiness
Drama to help me know I'm alive
I hope I find you *soon