A year ago today it was me and her.
That girl who inadvertently started all of this.
I remember walking down her street talking about Oreo's I think.
I remember I was happy I think.
I remember a few weeks later when she tore my heart from my chest.

I remember a few months later when I finally got over her.
I remember it in a fit of yelling and rage.
I remember being able to see clearly.
I remember I was I happy I think.
I remember rekindling an old flame a few weeks later.

I remember sitting in a field by a pond.
I remember dancing in a kitchen.
I remember saying "I love you"
I remember I was happy I think.
I remember a month or two later when I had to leave her behind.

I remember starting fresh.
I remember hot coffee and long nights.
But I also remember teaching myself to sleep.
I remember the first chapter of my first book.
I remember I was happy I think.
I remember the most beautiful eyes I've ever seen.

I guess today is the day for remembering the year, and looking forward to the next.
I look back and I see pain, and tears, and some minor alcohol abuse.
But I also see joy, and new friends, and the fresh air I so desperately needed.
I ****** up a lot in 2014 and if I had the option to go back and change it.
I would decline.
Because right now I'm happy... At least I think.

I left with no money and no girl.
But I came home with so much more.
Friends worth more than gold.
Stories that still amaze me.
And a passion that drives me more than any lover.

Like the fire spitting from the tip of my lighter.
Like the way it feels every-time I write a new chapter.
Like when I finally let go of the things that made my mind tear.
Like the passion of the girl with the white flower in her hair.
You see intensity is not new to me.
If anything it's addiction that has since become a part of me.
But tell me what's wrong with living a life that actually makes me feel **alive.