Dear little Paper Clip
holding together
my work
and subsequently
my life
You keep my chaos
nice and tidy

I could just tear
out all my hair
Rip up all my papers
Quit my job
and be a broke
artist

All the pressure
my endless list of
things to do
The never ending
questions that I
never know
the answers to

But then there you are
little yellow Paper Clip
calm in your role
you understand
your place and I
almost envy you

You keep it all
together
and you look good
doing it

Today I will try
to be
more like you.

In deep sleep, her  anguished voice rings a bell in my brain,
hear the screams of a woman in my blood stream,
hallucination, I loved to believe,  but then it became more frequent
at night, she whispers, her intimate secrets, without shame
in to my ears, in a seductive voice.Do I like it? she snickers
I got used to it's persuasive lilt, sometimes it  sounds like a complaint.
If I turn a deaf ear, she knows how to make me listen
Then I am all ears; become her single, faithful, captive listener.
She questions me sometimes"Tell me what you know about ***?"
I go and learn the fundas on the female of the spices,
in detail, pass the test,
wonder, how little I know about her as a person. Isn't she my counterpart?
She talks about the curtain of ignorance, that still segregates  her from him
and chides me "Will you be complete, if I didn't wake you up"

in the winter i met a boy
who lied about his love for me,
who hit me
never knowing why
and still, he said:
"i'm only doing this because i love you"
he left bruises on my arm
and scars on my wrists,
he always made fun of my
weight.
he never failed to say: "i love you"
with his mouth full of lies.
it has gotten so bad
to the point where i started
believing that
i deserved all he was doing to me

in summer, i met a boy
who treated me like a princess
he bought me nice things,
wrote me letters
he took the pain
a w a y
my parents approved of him,
my friends did too
he kisses like the devil
while keeping all of my demons
away
my friends told me
keep him. stay.
now i know
i deserved
more
than the boy i met in the winter
-b.m