It’s been so long
since we last spoke
but today,
your still there
inside my head
like you never left

Parents are the most peculiar things,
You think you’re really close
Yet really you are so far apart

Why do I feel a failure
When I prefer to be a sailor,
A loner, a lost ghost,
A captain of a ship
I pray I live in hope
My last words won’t ever slip
I dream yet still learn
Your tender touch I mustn’t yearn
I laugh outside,
But cry hard inside
Like a loud ringing bell
You will never know I live in hell
Every tear drop I weep
I’m able to wash down
Every sidewalk, alley,
Even the dingiest street
Now, I mustn’t go astray
If I was to say
I saw my mum asleep
Also thought it would be
The last time we’d ever meet

Every time I shut my eyes
I see you
Right there
In front of me
Where you shouldn’t be

Fight or flight-
That’s what they say, right?
Say what you like
While the skin is pale
Throughout the day and night
Like a fresh clean sheet -
Crispy and white
Yes, you have guessed-
Anxiety and stress,
Adhd and my Aspergers
Smothers me tightly
Never gently or lightly
I hear the wind
In the leaves
As darkness
Covers my eyes
The most caressing breeze
Takes me down to the floor
Straight to my knees

She loves me
she loves me not,
She breaks my heart
she knows the spot