quietly, i’ll rap on your living room window and you will show me true elation.  i will beckon you out into the night.  we will rush to my car, and you will see the two planks of cedar strapped to the top.  as i press the gas, we’ll both gaze at each other and realize that we’re running, hard and fast, away from the noise that we know and making a new home.  i will park somewhere outside of any city limits and we’ll scream in unison.  for freedom, for hope, we’ll grab the cedar from the roof and surf the skies.  all throughout the endless night, we’ll be fluidly passing through time and space and just as they are, we will be, one in the same.  gently gliding through stars, i will pick the flowers growing out of the holes in the sky and from that garden, i will hand you a bouquet of colors never known by you.  you’ll see new sights and i will be there holding your hand, loving you gently and forever.

a beaten man bleeds, but lives boldly
trees, leaves and ****** skin diseases      :    before we bleed, we scream
i’ve screamed; we bleed; i’ve done it all and we’re here together
in sickness, i have seen the wall of sound that frightens me
in health, i’ve heard the yelps of a beautiful young dog with coins for eyes and golden silk for a coat
in insanity, i’ve found myself, twisted, i know, but i am lying there; content
in life, i am everything all of the time
in death, i’ve seen the truth
in venice, my gondola has spilled over into a stream of consciousness which i have not known of
in paris, i’ve slept at the bottom of the seine
in corfu, i’ve basked in warmth and love
in moscow, i’ve seen a man’s heart and a woman’s soul be married
in the church, i have loved, bled and screamed
my hunger has not been satiated;  bolder now, i’ve been louder
in a quiet field; i’ll lie with you; i’ll bleed you dry; i’ll replenish you; i’ll love you; i’ll write our life stories on the surrounding woods
i’m beginning again; i’m burning fuel to start the end of my consumptive nature

i digress, i digress, i aggresively digress

the convex, the wretch caves
listlessly, she folds
primitive in her ways, she survives

a tear in time
just like the moments in REM
she has control

and her heart!

and her heart!

with teeth, now, with teeth
she opens up and her teeth scream in unison
“we are and thank god for that”

welcomed to her own subconscious
she eats well and sleeps tightly
her food is her madness

serenity:thepeace

serenity:thepeace

liquified dessert cakes
solidified scents
the pink slip

truth be told
she has lived a lucid life
bereft


what a lazy martyr!


what a lazy martyr!

the lights, color

the arrow piercingthe falls, water
breathing, a tryst, keeping, a word
with a collectively, billowing heart, the race to enlightenment began.

‘to the woods’
‘to our minds’
‘in our hearts’ the arrival, the departure and a hole where we used to stand.
a hole in time, in space.  a hole.

i am a hole.

wicked thorns on wicked wings
they fly and pierce the sky
the gashes open wide
the liquid life
pours
out

blessed words from blessed tongues
they soar and mend the wounds
the holes close up
the simple strife
floats
away

when we leak the color red
we feel alive although we’re quick to die
when the truth is spilled right
we know our pride and we’re ready to die

last meals, first truths
last loves in kissing booths
the world you need to get to is inside
godspeed and goodnight

i am at the top of beggar’s peak
i have lived alone
i brew tea and sit serenely staring at the top of the world
the sky holds me in and i am thankful

i am wading in mudslap creek
i have swum alone
i splish, splash and stomp in the gold forest with all my livelihood
the earth holds me up and i am thankful

i am strolling in baldie woods
i have seen a home
i cut, craft and toil all the day long in perfect serenity
the world embraces me and i am thankful

i am dead in this gracious world
i have lived content
i breathed, climbed and sang all my life without wrong and all things were gold
the gods love on me and i am thankful

hit the road
i’ve been bold
talking in my sleep
i grit my teeth

walking the streets at night
i’ve decided that everything is emptiness
everything as i know it, is emptiness
how refreshing life is
how incredibly refreshing my mind is

my mind is emptiness
my heart is emptiness
my lust is emptiness
my love is emptiness
my thoughts, my theories, my ambitions, my abortions, my cheating, lying habits, my dreams, my girlfriends, my world, my room, my hate, my anger, my joy, my pain are all emptiness

nothing happens
nothing is a word and words don’t exist
the way that i am tied to words is emptiness
the alcoholism is emptiness
the drugs are emptiness
the friends are emptiness
my family is emptiness
i am emptiness

there is no support, no conflict, no harbored poor emotions, no bold ideas, no sympathy, no death, no life and no person.

thank god, allah, buddha, shiva, abraham, dalai lama, bob dobbs, the cosmos, myself and all those other wonderful concepts that don’t exist because they are mere words.