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Riot Jun 2014
i wonder what would happen
if i commeted suicide
those of you who think this means i am suicidal
i'm not

it just mean you care more
when one foot is out the door
you feel worse when you see someone crying
you wanna find them more
when you see they are hiding

if i commeted suicide
i wouldn't worry about whos there
at my funeral
i wouldn't care

because if i commeted suicide
that means i already lost
i was done
i wanted to escape
whatever the cost

i will not commit suicide
but i will die inside
next time you say

*i am not right
Riot Jun 2014
today
he said he loved me again
my one and only friend
he said that it would never
happen again

so i cried
prayed
cut away the pain
i wasn't good enough
that's why he hurt me
right?

it's hard to figure out
why you're a punching bag
why everynight
he comes home drunk
and with your hair
he drags you
to his bedroom
the only thing you couldn't do
escape

he was too strong
you fell in love with how strong he was

so you let yourself
be his punching bag
as long as he said
i love you
nevermind the punches
and drags
because his "tough love"
was all the love you had

it was hard to figure out
why he was so mad

so they lived their lives again
sins commeted
deed done
she just tried not to let him influence
her one and only son
because it's
hard
to look at your parents
as heros
when your father is the villian
your father bonds with you the most
but you need to
stay away from him
but it's
hard

when your father controls
your every
single
move

you grow up seeing your father hit girls
it doesn't matter to you
you wanna do it to

so you get in fights at school
there's a pool
of teachers
asking you
why do you act so cool?

coming to school
with bruises
as if there's nothing else to do

the crule
punching bag rules
change
when it's not you

you see your child
bleeding
crying
you die inside

you protected him with all your heart
but you can't do anything outside
the overwhelming sadness
brings you to the ketchen

she knows she can't go back
next time she sees him
he's drunk again
it's time again

for her to remember
everything he did

remembering the ****** lyrics
to her own sad song
taking out the knife
as he stumbles along
she thrusts

as if this is the only way to breathe
her son comes home from school
right after she cleans

he asks
"where is daddy
where has he gone?"

it was hard to speak for years
but the one thing she said was
"right where he belongs"

— The End —