I held a gun against my head
and pulled the trigger
but I'm not dead
I laid in a bath of tepid water
slit my wrists
bled like slaughter
I poured petrol from a can
lit a match
a flaming stand
I fell down upon a track
then came the train
I didn't stand back
I strung a rope inside the carport
kicked the chair from my feet
without a thought
I woke up screaming from a nightmare
clawing furrows in my chest
that lay bared
I took some pills and alcohol
and drifted in a void
but still I don't fall
I woke upon each wretched lie
Alive, but dead
Until your *Goodbye