Now this restless night
All is familiar
But not quite the same as before

Sure
There were the dreams
But the way you smelled
And the sound of your voice
Has been slipping away from me for months

Now this restless night
My trembling body closes its eyes
And does not need to sleep or dream
To see you behind it’s eyelids
I have not slept when I get up to go
I do not kiss anyone goodbye the way I might have a different pair of lips
I do not listen to the haunting snores
Coming from the wrong side of the bed

Now this restless night
I shut the door quietly behind me
But here is my secret
I wanted to slam the door and run!
Far away from these feelings
Far too large to leave them behind in this place
Or tuck into my jacket
Far, far too large