Falling Apart

I feel as though I've been run over, again and again,
I'm falling apart, with nothing to hold me together.
You've moved on to someone else, I'm left with nothing,
Nothing to keep me going, no one to give me hope.

The truth is that I loved you, or at least I thought so,
But when someone beat me to you, I was left crushed.
It's not just you either, I'm losing people left, right and centre,
I'm mentioning no names because it hurts too much to tell.

But nothing hurts like this, there is no feeling like this,
The feelings that I had for you, now gone in an instant.
You found somebody else to love you, I was not enough,
You moved on and so must I, but I this I want you to know.

I still love you, I'm sorry.

i lay in grass stilly
departing myself
                 into heavens exquisite face
whose boundless leaping freckles shimmer
most gracious and profoundly
consuming the frail last light
into its infinite chaste *******
(only to bud it out again
in little ****** o' glimmering)

from passions full and writhing
is born a mostly fragile flower

    (a whole garden of them)

they sprout and bud
in your light lady

(and in your
soil sweating
i'll plant their
seeds)

i'll
push them
1x1(thrusting)
down into you deeply
and from your ivory throat
there will come a Spring
ing sharp growl
(and it will
be a
rose)

It's not you and it’s not the feelings
I couldn't make you feel.
It's not the things I could have said but didn't
And it isn't your laugh that I could get used to
Or my hand that didn't touch you
but misses to be touched of you.

It's just me that can't seem to find
someone like you
It's just me that you can't find in love
with anyone
including you.

The lone and the hungry we find and discard
And I cannot be happy being without what swims in my head

It's not you, it's not her or anyone
but the one I couldn't let in.
The one I can't seem to find
who like me is alone and
knowing like me that these words are her own.

And I can't be me without what dives deep in my head
Together with the falling of a heart that’s flooding.

I cannot feel the mystery of love
So I regress to sense an empty sky of alone.
Believe me it’s not you why my face has turned sour
It's just me that wants you to be
what I know I cannot attain

It's just me that needs to get back
to what I know I once felt.

It was August, as I remember
The moment I believed in love at second sight
I should have listened to my father
Everything was not right

He got what he want
I was left used
I could have said no, but I can't
Those eyes couldn't be refused

Of all the ones that had passed
For him I fell the hardest
Should have had my eyes closed
Should have slept during August

From all I've done and all I've said
let them not seek to find who I've been.
An obstacle stood and transformed
my acts and way of my life.
An obstacle stood and stopped me
many a time as I was going to speak.
My most unobserved acts,
and my writitings the most covered --
thence only they will feel me.
But mayhaps it is not worth to spend
this much care and this much effort to know me.
For -- in the more perfect society --
someone else like me created
will certainly appear and freely act.