I cry.
In words that make paper cuts in silence
It's better than just crying in sound
Sounds that leave you repeating those sounds, till you drown out the sounds and allow yourself to sleep.
See I've known these sounds too much.
I used music, but it made me cry harder that when I finally found the words, I found a peace, a balance called release.

So I write and write my sorrows
For a tomorrow that doesn't cut in fast enough

You shout
You punch me
You judge me
You suffocate me
You're right
You can
Because you can
I'm silent
I have bruises
I'm useless
I'm wrong
I can't
Because you can

We were both at distance
I couldn’t  see you,
Until
I heard you sing,
I cried, so beautiful
A song I will never remember,
But know the feeling
I try to remember
Eres tú

I woke up in tears,
To remember would be a dream
To hear your song
To cry
To see
Eres tú

Love
To my past,
I'm sorry
I put up barriers so you couldn't reach me
You scared me, so free with me
but i couldn't see past my view
You were the same as yesterday
Impetus that i would look past you
You would look me in the light
and smile
Oh that smile,
I loved to smile
but i still couldn't see
It was me

Too many hells to deal with
Broken inside
making sure you wouldn't see this
Our connection was bright as sun
I could only glance for so long
You wanted to tie me around your body
and breathe with you,
but i was still learning to change the heart beating blues
If i could've given you a chance and time
I would feel your heart beating in sync with mine

Like a rhythm that doesn't hold back
Two lovers that meet at the sound of a hi-hat
I would hear you drumming deep in my chest
As i would string the bass that twisted tongues
and bodies pressed
I love you forever
Just from afar we stand
Searching for that feeling
as lovers pass
only to glimpse at the love that has surpassed
the stages of the past.
My last;

-When does it stop hurting
-Learning not to care
-Learning not to cry
- Just hold it all inside
- Learn to be silent
-Learning to breathe
The list I go through everyday
Is starting to change
-Be invisible
-Don't breathe
-Dont smile
-Don't speak
Eventually I won't exist,
all the life has left my body
Just empty
A vessel of space no longer hurting
Just passing by the hours and days
That no longer matter
Because i finally got here
It stopped, the pain stopped
But so did my heart

Smile even as the tears fall
When you're alone and no one can see the beauty
The real, the ugly truth
That you've hidden for so long
Stop trying to be so strong
Stop, slow down and breathe
Open your eyes, let go of everything and smile
You are messy, and all alone
But be brave and stand
Show your scars, no coverups
There's no need to be scared
No need to be tough
Just smile
you are enough.