The stone Angel fascinates me
and repulses me
It stands about 8 feet tall in a fountain
Its made of white fake stone
It pees
He wears a gown and has wings
His white hands gather around his middle holding a far too small water jug
Unless your within 2 feet of it
You can't see the little stone jug
It stands at the Corner of Tennessee Avenue and Beech Street here
*******
in front of an ugly little strip mall
I walk by it and we smile together
That Angel and I
I said to it one day," How lucky you are to get to eternally **** on this MayBerry Hell"
He smiled back
He pees as the children play by
As temporary lovers hold hands
He pees as the old people hobble by with their canes
When giving directions, people here actually say,"You know, it's down by where that Angel pees." ***
Sometimes I wish I were he

I drown in the careless glow of the moon
He bares me an eternal wink
And I sink
in the forever fading,
blue velvet sky
Grasping for the faintest hope of
Reality
The sins I cling to,
make the stars gasp
My face burried in White skirts
As I have the strange tendency
to wear white chiffon
To funerals

I attend the funeral of hope,
weekly
Watch the birth of despair
daily
I think God has gone deaf,
atleast to
my cries
People look at possessions as
success
They aren't
They're stones tied to souls
making sure we all drown with the
Jones'
we all so long to keep up with
Oh yes,
those Jones' are falling to the
Depths of "stuff"
far faster than we Smiths
Good Lord
All day, Everyday,
I see and hear the "upper class"
whine
About the stupidest things
Its appocalypse if the Jones' buy
a BMW
while the neighbor only owns a Cadilac
Utter DEATH
I see these things and hear these silly conversations daily
"Oh did you see how fat Pam's *** looked in that Vera dress at yesterday's luncheon?"
"Yes! All that money spent on lypo! Haha!"
Disgusting ****
like sulfuric acid poured into my ears
And the road on the way to this Country Club and Gated Community called
Deerfield
Is lined with falling down trailers and houses without glass in the Windows
Clothes hung on ancient strings because the wearers can't afford a dryer
Or the electicity to run one
Children filthy and barefoot playing with
hand-me-down toys
in hay field yards
Still cleaner and more pure
than the
Filthy Rich

She stood, barefoot,
at his burial
It was August and hot
Her onyx, knee length hair, hung loose,
blowing in the storm she was conjuring
Hailing from the eastern skies
Her burnt oil eyes, dry
She had no need for tears,
Heaven would cry for her
Born the first of 13
in a long line of darkened blood
300 years bread from Ireland,
to the Cumberland mountains and rolling hills
Every first before her, Born with a caul
"Knowing"
Each generation striving for 3 daughter's and seven sons
Seventh sons born water witches
Each first daughter a
"Seer", amongst other dark blessings
Cauls kept, and buried at midnight 'neath willow branches for blessings
These first daughters,
bore one of three hairs,
raven black, silver, or gold
from birth
Never greying
I watched her
stayed with my grandmother
beside her husband's grave
Till night fell
Her hair, never went grey

I stood watching her from the left of the lights
Tiny arms and legs
She was
My little Swan!
I danced in shadows
As she danced in light
Mother and daughter
She is magnificent!
Her golden curls flying
Tights sparkling
Toes, barely touching the stage

Mother passes the light
To the dancing daughter
And all is as it should be
She caught but a glimpse of me
In my selfish shadows
Dancing in her glory
Our eyes locked for the briefest of seconds
She danced on........

I've been at it for 13 hours in whisky and whining
I'm afraid
I speak more to the poets here than my own blood
And everyone is ready to leave
I handled a divorce better
If you all go
I go
What is this FUCKERY?
A joke?
Punishment?
Please fix it back
Most poets don't like change because no change for us has ever been for the better
Some of you, I've written with, cried with, spoken with, and yes
LOVED
for years
You go,
I go
You jump ship
I jump ship
I ******* LOVE you all

I woke up this morning thinking "Ooh, pretty poetry, wonder what lovely words graced the screen while I slept."
I woke to THIS! More crap I can't understand. What the hell? I can't work this. Now, I'm gonna go to my crap job and with out a single pretty poem to occupy my raving lunatic mind because I don't know how to work these new changes! Its 6:57 am and I'm going to have a drink!! Good day!

These changes aren't good. Please, Mr. York, change it back. We love your poetry site. But we love the way it WAS.

Standing, in the gathering darkness
in the fading light of the bleeding sun,
Hooded and cloaked,
amongst the dying trees
Golden cursed tears of scattered forever,
Falling from white eyes,
ringed in black
Decisions to stay held
aloft,
A leaf blown through out time on the breeze of
Eternity
Or,
To wake a heart, cursed with forever
Knowing
That the bearer of such a cursed heart
Will fade, as the colour of a rose lain upon an immortal grave
Dying trees can't speak
and reflections held in mortal tears
Evaporate~A

She loved Pan,
Adored him,
Wanted so much for him to
Dwell,
Deep,
Within her
But Tink,
so small
And Pan,
Well, he was Pan
He loved the Wendi Bird
So,
Tink
was happy for the mere chance
to rest
in Pan's pocket
And he carried her there.....

I knelt,
beneath the weeping maple
watched its leaves for a time
It bleeds
Dragons Blood, its very name
Red
Star shaped leaves
Later
They unfold
Build
as the moon waxes
wanes,
The dogwood blooms
Unfold
as lovers unfold held souls
Fingers
Unfold
To hold another hand
Paper hearts
Unfold
to wrap, and keep another heart
And the moon
unfolds for you

It doesn't matter
What they say or think
Whether they like you
Hate you
It's a show
One long *** dance
and I didn't forget my tutu
or toe shoes
Its a fight,
every breath,
every night
Smile Amanda,

Do it up right

Lye as still as the earth
in winter
Let him be the snow
Give a red lipped half grin
turn your face
say GO

Do it up right

Pretend
Be all you should
never could
Dance For him,

Do it up right

Spread your legs
with grace and style
Point your toes
red lipped smile

Do it up right

Arch your back
moan just right
whisper of things
They all wanna hear
Set a silk trap, spider

Do it up right

And when they ask
how your bills are paid
Comment, on how your legs are splayed
Tell them,

"I do it up right"

I let a stranger in,
to ******* bitter fruit
I silenced his gun,
Told him to shoot
Gave him my body
Wrapped him in my vine
Kept my dark heart
It's black, but it's mine
We danced our skin dance
Till we saw the sun rise
I feel no shame
No need for more lies
I'll do as I will
An it harm none
I've been set free
My will,
Be done~A

I'd like an explanation please,
If you wouldn't care to take the time
Tell me why I drink so much
And feel life isn't worth a dime

Please, take just a few seconds
Realise I'm sending out a plea
I'll pay you for your time,
If you'll just listen to me

Understand my whispers
Are really hidden screams
Reality is so visceral
But nightmares replaced my dreams

Tears have turned to blood
In the ocean they drown
No matter the number of prayers
My soul remains hell bound

Please explain this darkness
Why the sun will never shine
And why it is that I give
But no heart will ever be mine

Can you sit with me a moment
And not see the ugly I hide
Just speak of smiles and truth
Could you kindly abide?

And when the sun passes
over this weeping tree
When the dark of night takes over
Could you just maybe remember me?

Awful
Black butterfly,
Lacking even the blue dots,
worn upon the wings
ripped off by smiling children at play
I dwell in the shadows of low light
I'm forlorn and forbidden
Alone
My feast,
contains saline and salty tears
Unloved
Grasped by unpoetic hands in the stillness of midnight
No matter how pretty
How soft
What expensive things I decorate my unholy self with
I dwell alone
One of many
Forlorn, forbidden things

I spoke with the Lady today. She said you were coming back. I won't work with you. I refuse to spend my time pining over the likes of you. I don't wish to see you everyday. However, I will not be responsible for your lack of employment. The destruction of all you hold dear, yes. But your unemployment, is beneath me.

"You was told wrong. I have a new job. I like it where I'm at."

WERE. You WERE told wrong. Good God man. Learn proper English. You owe me. If money is not in My hand on the 24th, I'll collect your teeth as payment with that pink shiny bat I carry.

"I'll pay you. You're dark and ****** up. So little and pretty. A Manson Barbie. You need medication you know."

*******. I want what's mine. It's unadvisable to be late. I'll send her every picture, every text. I'll knock on your door during family ******* dinner. No one wants that ****.

"I said I'd pay you back. And blackmail doesn't look good on you. You're insane. Seek help."

I told you I was insane from jump.

"I didn't think you was serious. Have you tried ******?"

WERE!! I didnt think you WERE serious! Look, as much as I enjoy this ***** fit argument, I have important business to tend to. Your gold tooth will look good as a charm on my bracelet, though I prefer silver. Don't be late.

"You're one f-ed up lady. I love you, you know."

Apparently not enough. I can't love. Not you. Not anyone. I gotta go. Until the next explosive ******* bomb, I bid thee adue.....

"

Tulips catch sky water for the fairies today
Late blooming March Bells,
the only sun
Dandelions dance, taking even the breath of The Almighty
In their glistening glory
Weeping Cherry tree sways, as though she's a ballerina,
Covered in perfectly cut crystals
Oil on the street,
becomes a rainbow with fragments of light,
stolen from heaven
As I watch,
Heaven falls
Making love with every earthen thing
giving shine
Love
Nourishing
Spring Rains

Numb
The need to feel,
Anything
So I wandered
Till I found wild innocence
Dressed his young lips in liquor
Filled his youthful ears with dark whispers
His sense of smell with chanel
His lust with my skin
And for the briefest of moments,
I felt
Inhibited
Full
Shame with the sunrise
But still
Wanted,
Inhibited

I sent him away
with the opening of the sun's golden eye
Resting alone.....

I envy your heart,
Its beating

I lost mine
P
  I
    E
       C
          E
By piece
A dried up and dead rose
All that remains

No matter the amount of blood I've spilt
Trying to fill my veins

I see you have rosy cheeks, a smile
May I borrow them,
Just for awhile?

I may return
Yet
More likely burn

But your rosey cheeks,
How they invite

I'm hungry
Give me just
        A
B
  I
   T
     E~A

A fragment of mist contained within a black and grey rainbow
Drop of acid rain
Scent of sulfur on a sunny day
The thorn that ****** the finger of the rose given Lady
A speechless recording
Out of tune song, sang by crows
Hair on a starving mans plate
A childs screaming nightmare, at the witching hour
Golden haired sinner amongst the feast of all saints
Me
~A

I don't know the realisation
of a vacation
of motivations

My own

Truth is rude
reality crude
Beauty eludes

This zone

So aviated
Emaciated
Unimancipated

Empty

Time escapes
Protruder rapes

I can't think
Thus I drink

There is no hope
To cope
Eternal rope

A necklace

A brace
Losing race
Hard case

I

Was YOUR vacation
Emancipation
Salvation

YOUR

I was your
Door
Floor

Your

Rug
Drug
Biting bed bug

Me

I can't fight
Not right
Can't take flight

Bottle of *****
Won't win just lose
Shades of blues

I cry
Lie
Wish I'd die

Complicate
Break
Fake

Feed me
Fear

I have this tendency to somehow stay caught
In the in between
And I can't avoid the realisation
Of never reaching reality
I dream
I sink in the ureality in which I dwell
My whole life is lost
I fight daily with a past that chases me
No matter the amount of sweat
I pour
Running
I'm found
I can't make sense
I'm senseless
And I can't help but like it
Cry at it
I've no hope of salvation
From me

"A Robert Palmer please, and two ultras for my friends here." sais the over weight man in pink golf shorts.
Of course sir
"I bet she purrs like a kitten between the sheets. Haha!" whispers the man sitting next to the pink golf shorts
"Look at that ***!", laughs the grey haired checkered shirt
"I'll smack it when she brings our order, bro.",replies pink shorts
Here is your Robert Palmer sir.
And two ultras.
WHACK!
Squeeze
They laugh

Head dropped
Tears fall
Shame felt

Yellow Haired Servant Girl

My paper boat is sinking
In the mile deep salt
I'll drown soon
The moon
Only watches
Lusts
for the
Sun

I walk these streets,
of which, I don't belong
Ever carrying the scent of
Death,
and vintage whisky
A visceral and demented
MayBerry hell
Still,
It is here, in which I dwell
Everyone plays their part,
Pays their bills
Me?
A mere ghost
haunting these wooded hills
A house,
I possess  
Home,
I lack
I wander
Alone
I belong no where
Everywhere
Just not here
And so.....

I wander
And belong to no one
A wanderess.......

~A

I've knelt,
for moons upon moons
Tears flood and drown me
Gravel, dirt
in my knees,
worn as
mere decoration,
stockings
Dust
collected by Time
in an
Hourglass
Paper heart,
Upon moonlit
Paper heart
Time is
Still
And there is
No answer....

Well,
doesn't everybody just love a poet?!
No.
Poets love poets
And poets don't love poets
What poets do love poets,
Can't be together
We're all nuts, insane, delusional
Lunatics!
The lot of us!
Peering into souls,
dreaming about
"filth and flowers",
as my best poet friend says
Making **** up in our
Moonlit Minds
Bending to every breeze in spring and summer
Praying to every cloud that passes!
Dwelling in bubbles blown by children!

Beautiful Insanity
Loved, lusted for,
unloved, lonely

Who loves a poet?

We are but scorched women
Giving away pieces of our worn,
Paper hearts
Only to watch them burn with daydreams never lived
Crying tears of soot
Leaving trails of black
on once rosey cheeks
Our kisses, but ash
Painted red smiles
our masks
Souls of ebony,
traced with scarlet
We sing unheard songs
of glowing embers
Falling on deaf ears
Hearts not to be held
or touched
Ash falls apart with the softest breath

Scorched Women

When sleep can't find me, I guess because I'm camofluoged and fit too well in the night
(After all, sleep does have its eyes closed)
I make the 25 minute drive down to "L" street.
I sit on my old bench in that ****** fake park with the lined up giant rocks and the one weeping cherry tree. City counsels gift to the street ******, rapists, thieves  and drug peddlers.
  I watch, I listen and sip my whisky. L street is the worse part of town here. There's an asylum on one side of the corner, a bank on the other. Red light number 3. People are always lined up in front of the asylum. I suppose for little blue pills.
  Further down the row of crumbling bricks, is a cafe that plays live music on Friday and Saturday nights and across from that is a pool hall that sells green hotdogs. On the other side of the pool hall, is an empty building with my tobacco lady painted on the side of it. And my "bitchs bench", as I call it, sits beside that.
My mother has always raised immortal hell about my going there. Day or night. "You'll get *****, hooked on the "L" pills or murdered. Dont come crying to me when it happens", she sais. But as much time as I've spent there, I've spoken with more than a few of those "undesirables" and they all have a story of such pain and heart break. Or they're just mentally ill.
They're daisies. That didn't grow upright in this field of life. They tripped.
  My "L" street,
is where the daisies tripp.

Music, the wind
I was a wave, upon the ocean
A leaf, free,
and floating untethered from the branch
In those instances, no longer mortal
I WAS every emotion contained in flesh
A bird, fearless
in a hurricane
I made love with every note,
every melodie
Crescendo, was *******
The music caressed every part of me
from the inside out
Kissed my toes,
as a long lost Love
Cradled my soul,
like I was a newly born child
To dance,
for me, was heaven
and hell
It is living and dying,
in an ethreal universe
where only beauty exists

For you, my friend;)

I placed my hope between the wings of honey bees
To watch them fly away with it
My dreams, upon stars glittering in the velvet beyond
They've long since fallen
Thoughts of life,
given to butterflies, only to poison them
Voice, placed in a crows mouth
Only a caw
Any beauty in my possession
went to the gargoyles, they needed it more
My heart, I so gently laid upon the flower petals
Then winter came
My Love,
I climbed the mighty oak,
And placed it in the leaves
To watch it fall, leaf by leaf,
turning to dust
in the cold~A

We're sand, you know
Slipping through splayed fingers
Our hearts,
Are but ash filled bubbles
Carried upon the lilac,
rough winds of May
Blown by peach faced children
Sensitive to the human touch
Grasped too hard,
And a poets heart
Will burst
Should we fall,
As we so often do
We can't be caught
Promiscuous in our words
Faithful, in our dreams
We,
Ash filled bubbles
Eternally in May and lilac~A

They don't see me
But you look so closely

And they don't hear me
While you, listen well

Its loud here
One can never tell

But you do
In your silence

Pity, pity
Me

How I need you here
I'm wingless

Fairy gone cold
Malecifant

And I care not
My wings don't sparkle

They are No more
Chopped

A loved one
Passed

And I walk
Amongst those with wings

All these artists gather here on my floor
Three evenings
Poets, painters, musicians
Arguing, playing

I don't need streets of gold
The angels couldn't possibly make this music
Its weekend
And they gather

I'm a muse to many
So they say
A minority
My pitiful poetry and dance

But I dwell in these hills
With them
And my mahogany floors
Rests their shoes

Loud and melodous
Joey picks a tune and yells about fascism
Maria, sings her Spanish tunes
Stella laughs and dances our dance

Jimmy plays the strings to fire and ash
Chris beats the drums like an angry demon
Portia paints scenes that bring tears
Chloe makes her black and whites burst with every colour

They gather on my floors
I lay on the pillows and smile for them
With my liquor
They tell me I'm pretty

Catch my tears in mason jars
Moonshine passed between artists and lips
My house can't hold them all
We lack a banjo

Some "rap" some sing
Some write others paint
We all argue and fuss
Its a scene of crazy great



How I wish you all were here too

The bees and butterflies already came
I've no more nectar,
For you to take

**** me
If you will
Go on
Take of me what's left

Ash,
Once carried on a lilac breeze

Smoke,
From a limply held cigarette
Burnt
To the filter

Me
A distant souls memory
Remaining on a winds
Left swirl

My resin fairy gave birth
Prose, Her name
Wingless *******
In my pocket

She and I
The same

May the stars fall
The moon drown
The sun burn out
Mountains bow to the ground

May the sea boil
Flowers no longer grow
Let it be ash that falls,
Never again snow

May all that is outside
Mirror that with in
Let there be no more lies
To cover the sin~A

Stella said," Momma, I want a jump castle for my friends at my birthday, and daddy."
But daddy won't be there
"Momma, I hate court. That judger is a meanie weanie."
I know baby, shhh
"Can I have a jump castle?"
You'll have your castle, now hush
Stella sais," Momma, why don't daddy like me?"
He does baby
"Why won't he look at me?"
I don't know, princess, daddy is sick
"He needs a doctor and a sucker and a shot."
Yes baby, shush
She said,"Momma, why did daddy hurt you, like the tangles hurt my hairs?"
I don't know baby