The lines around your crow’s feet make me laugh and cry in the same second. Yesterday's memories often pervade me but old letters crystallize these moments in the hindsight of a tight chest. I wanted you to know that I’m sorry for how I acted. I was tricked by the world. Acceptance, I know that you’re not greedy but this person trying to get it was formed to be. Beauty, power and success equals acceptance in this world and as I age the price tags keep rising while the fads continue to fill the grave yards. And every ones watching right?! Did you ever slow down to ask why? Get good grades, a good job, a pretty wife, big house, money, the good life… Well how do we do that and says who? Acceptance is acquired through our eyes and ears that are manipulated by ideas that exploit insecurities and fears for profit. Why do think 1% has all the money? The crisis isn’t about lack of money but the lack of acceptance! We are born at sunrise and are over the hill by noon and by sunset we wait for the midnight train. Life is short! Heathens know this and will trick you to enslave your life through their overpriced materials that reduce your true talents to a novelty that works for them. Ahh yes a controlled slavery but what for?! Why give your life to this when you’re dead tomorrow? Did you know that Jesus already accepts us for who we are, without exploitation! He hates sin but Loves us! Listen I am who I am and you are who you are and I like that. I don’t need a red bow. We will have disagreements on things but I don’t want to change you. I don’t want what the world says acceptance is. Now with all this free time I can embrace my limits without ignoring my impending death as I allow my temporary masks of security to hit the floor. Jesus died on the cross to give you this freedom He wants to know you but again it’s your choice. 'The truth will set you free"

If jealousy is a green eyed monster,
Anxiety will be a blued eyed monster
With thorns that you do not take notice of
Until its too late and you are trapped in its suffocating embrace.
Save me, please.

Anxiety will rob you of your breath
She leaves you gasping for air when everyone can breathe just fine.
I can't look around,
Or they will know there is no heart next to my failing lungs.
Save me, please.

Anxiety will steal your light away
She will leave you in darkness
When she knows your fear of the dark will **** you.
My eyes look around wildly
Seeing yet unseeing
I need to find my way out of this crowd.
There are too many eyes that can see through me
She keeps me blind.
Save me, please

Anxiety will take away your courage
I am not brave enough to be in a room full of people.
I am not brave enough to talk to the girl sitting beside me for the last six months
I am not brave enough to look into your eyes.
Anxiety is a blue-eyed monster that won't give me back my courage.
Please please please, give it back.

Would you beat your body with your own fists?
Would you scream aloud at yourself for what you did?
Then why do you let your thoughts take control?
Why do you so easily allow your anger to take the fall?
There's a fine line between love and abuse.
That's something we should explore and choose.
It's so easy to taunt ourselves with the things we lose.
It's what we do, whether we beg or refuse.
The truth is that loving is the hardest part,
but cruelty is the roughest.
If the world was perfect,
we would acknowledge the distinction between the two.
We'd live happily as self-love makes the rules.
We would bend and break as we always do,
but the consequences wouldn't offend us as much
or be as crude.
There's a fine line between love and abuse.
The difference is the flight we take,
the ride we want,
and the weakness we fake.
It's a lifeless game,
this life we live.
So when you sin and sin,
will you beat your body with your own fists?
And when the times get hot and out of control,
will you talk yourself out of grace and forgiveness?

In the midst of knowledge and lack of interest.
In the midst of the schizophrenic and the sane.
In the midst of a generations pulse and silence.
In the midst of rainbows and a shade of black.
In the midst of learning within walls and mistakes.
In the midst of a diamond cave and decay.
In the midst of recession and curiosity.
In the midst of ******* and beliefs.
In the midst of losing and meeting people, with in people.
In the midst of corruption and delicacy.
In the midst of holy metaphors and touches.
In the midst of scratched knees and ignorance.
In the midst where black smoke, meets clear blue skies.
In the midst of isolation and others thoughts.
In the midst of debris and empires.
In the midst of a womb and a crippled old man.
In the midst of what you saw, hear and everything to come.
In the midst of phases and judgment.
In the midst of an ultimatum and obligation.
In the midst of white sheets and brown eyes.
In the midst of fantasies and ceilings.
In the midst of sight and dreams.
In the midst of contact and illusions.
In the midst of classification and fractions.
In the midst of repetition and time.
In the midst of blame and arrogance.
In the midst of feelings and stones.
In the midst of a significant others warmth, and a stranded iceberg.
In the midst of emotions trapped under dry soil, and the season they bloom.
In the midst of walking with clothes, and sleeping naked.
In the midst of eternity and extinction of saliva.

I’m here waiting to pierce through your existence.

a clean white page
freshly pressed
lined with blue
punched three times
stared back at my face

a single hand
took to pen
scribbled in the margin

words told stories
which recounted memories and dreams
blank ink streamed over the freshness

connecting lines to swirls
and dots to dots
sparking electricity

the lines save me from my past
and protect me from the future
decoding each line
I wait to find the answer