I was always too much of something for everybody
But it was quite a surprise to find
That I wasn't enough for you
have you ever asked yourself like why you so lonely?*
that maybe you give too much of your essence to people and never leave any of you for yourself
i know i do
and like that's maybe why i get so attached to humans
because in them,
i find myself
i need to change, because things shouldn't be this way
but it's hard sometimes you know, when most days you don't leave the house because you feel unworthy of the space you take up
so you'd much rather disintegrate into soil because you've become all too familiar with people stepping over you and admiring the outcome of your beauty but never the roots of your pain
i spend so much effort watering people in order for them to grow and hardly get enough sun shine to feed my own soul
because i don't know how to do anything else but care for everyone but myself
And though I may not mention it,
I need you to remain and sit in place within my life.
I'm home, I don't mind a few renovations but you can't move out.
Change the furniture, change the setting, change the colours of this love, but don't pack up.
Don't relocate, because I can't leave with you, hence I live with you.
Continue to settle, continue to speak your plans to my walls, we'll breathe life into them.
And may the building of this love never feel the clocks run forward.
by Dvniel Jones
when last have i had a 3am kind of conversation,
with my star like emotions scattered all over the darkest parts of me,
mimicking the sky,
my moon like persona that always returns back to hiding me away.
when last have i felt safe enough to let somebody in,
to not have visions of my vulnerability being tied to the bed after he locks the door behind him,
his voice like some sort of broken record that keeps on repeating that
"it's gonna be okay."
when last have i had a shoulder to cry on that isn't my own,
for my neck to stop worrying that the tear filled sea on either side won't get waves big enough to drown me.
when last okay,
when last has it felt good to be me.
We are human
We fight for freedom.
Peace between the races
And for the end of all wars.
Yet, we have sold ourselves
To mental slavery.
Concocting an idea of beauty
Each time we get close enough to grasp it.
We consume morsels
And curl our frail bodies over the toilet bowl
Stare into the mirror, and
For between our thighs
we have carved, a gap.
We paint our faces
and hide the artwork that lies beneath.
We are enslaved by ourselves
And in turn we enslave society.
But, we are human,
We fight for freedom,
Peace between the races
And the end of all wars.
But we neglect the wars going on inside us.