Starting up, the engine roars
The car lurches forward hard
Way too fast for us
We both grip the door, and
Have all four feet pressed to the floor
Has our chauffeur lost his mind?
Made a petty issue into a deathly lesson?
Me, I can't say for sure
Love makes me believe that's not the case
You, not so easily convinced
More sensible and logical
Than I can be at times
I let my emotions control me more
Could this have grown out of control?
Have we made a final mistake?
Ever foolish in our words and deeds?
Hoped it wouldn't end like this, because
Baby...I don't want this ending

Ah the way this feels
To be a part of us
And I know I'm just a part
Act One in a Broadway play
Special in my own right,
But not ever complete
Without Act Two

I've never felt this way before
The way a child feels with ice cream
The way a chemist feels with a mol
The way a Christian feels with Jesus
All of them combined
To make my heart swell
Bigger than the Grinch's
On Christmas Day in Whoville

And because it's grown so big
I can't help but to share it
Because it's like the best milkshake in the world
Two straws are necessary
And how this has come to be
Took my more than by surprise
Almost as if someone dissected my thoughts
And produced someone perfect
To more than cancel out the negative past

Although my face doesn't always smile
Know that through my frown,
That though my tears stick to my cheeks
Inside, the smile's still there
Because, see, it can't be switched
It can't be turned upside down
And even though I know it's hard
To see past my tears and frowns
Please know that it is there
Underneath everything else

It's like the embers of a roaring fire
Red hot, like the Chili Peppers
Inextinguishable, a passion so strong
And also reaching out forever
Like a line on a circle
Wrapping round and round
Like an infinite slinky
And like that slinky that goes on
That I could never get bored of playing with
That I could forever push down the stairs
And rush to the top, more excited than ever

This feeling, here in my heart
Means the world to me
I've learned so much from it
I've learned what it means
I've learned what love truly is
I've learned what smiles are made of
And learning a lot from this lesson
Seeing both the good and bad
Just makes the feeling stronger
To have the smile again

And this poem would have no purpose
If I didn't mention that I thought
That it could never be this way
That two could feel so much like one
While still being two
While letting us do us
Like smashing the ball out of the park
Farther than any home run before
And more powerful than a cannon's blast

And though I know that maybe
At sometime yet to come
My smile may not be as easy to see
I will know, as I know now
That smiles never fade
That they only hide close to the heart
Waiting for a chance to shine again
Like sunset's final wink before night

All of this is to say
I really really enjoy each day
I wouldn't want it any other way
I wouldn't want a thing to change
Together, things are never strange
And thinking about you makes me think
That this kind of ship could never sink

It didn’t mean for it to go
This far into the dark
I didn’t want the friendship glow
To be extinguished in that way

But I could not take anymore
The way that you behave
Your lies hurt like an open sore
All I wanted was to save

I wanted you to trust me
Just like friends should do
I just wanted you to see
How much I trusted you

But your words reflected a deeper thing
Something I’ve seen before
Something I wished never again to bring
To let into my door

And now the friendship glow
Is shut out completely
I just want for you to know
It really hurt me deeply

I'm writing a lot
So I want to talk about you
I could go on and on
About how 'us' is true
About how we
Should last for forever
No matter the problems
No matter the weather
No matter the goings on
No matter the fights
No matter the evil
No matter the nights
Where we don't agree
Where our different opinions
We don't seem to see
But more often than not
The way you treat me
Our smiles and laughter
Allow me to be me

And not that the sadness
Isn't me too
I just want to be happy
Because I'm with you
And when I'm not super
I know that you're there
If I ever should need you
If I ever get scared
If I ever need someone
To blot out the black
I know, no matter what
That you have my back
That you will be there
When my cards are down
When my face shows
The grimace of a frown
And you will drag
Me up by my shirt
Keeping my honest
And out of the dirt
Keeping me clean
Keeping me safe
Keeping me close
Keeping me honest
Which means the most
Because though I love you
Sometimes I lie
Not to hurt you, or anyone
Just to get by
But I don't want
Merely to get by
I want more than ever
You in my life

Your smile shines brighter
Than the sun in the sky
I would do anything
To prevent this from dying
And when I say such
I mean it as true
Meaning as much
As I hope to mean to you
Smelling your tender,
Loving, and caring person
Wafting your greatness
I'm in total immersion

I want you to know
What you mean to me
You're the whole show
And not just a scene

I want to watch
As we grow stronger
I want us so badly
To last longer than longer

And I know you know
How I feel about you
And I hope I show
You that I want to marry you

Because though I
Know now's not the time
I want it so badly
I want you to be mine

And I don't want you to think
That I don't think I'm yours
I don't want you to sink
Crying, on all fours

I want you to understand
The feelings within me
Because feeling them with you,
Well, they set me free

And that is to say
That you make me free
Not just for yesterday
But for as long as I can see

And though I realize
That we may not last
I've done my very best
To learn from the past

To treat you nicely
And respectfully too
I feel that's the least
I can give to you

Because when you smile
The world is right
And when you're sad
I stay awake at night

I try to think
Of what I can do
To make it better;
Your life, and mine too

We have a connection
Like twins from a womb
Able to talk through
Whatever we need to

And that means more
Than you could know
If I was with you,
I'd take ten years of snow

I'd bear the hard
And the boring life
If I could have the chance
To call you my wife

And that's not to say
That I want decisions soon
That I need an answer
By tomorrow afternoon

But it is to say
You mean so much to me
And honestly, when I think of it
There's no one with I'd rather be

I hope this makes
Your heart swell up
But I don't need it to
Your love is enough

I love you Lauren
You know it is true
I hold tight to Us:
To me and you

And I don't expect
Us to always agree
I only wish
For you to love me

And because you do
It makes me happy
I only want you
Even though it sounds sappy

You make me Me
Without even trying
When I am laughing
And when I am crying

You mean so much
To me as a person
I want my parents to say
You have done well, Son

Because you are with me
Even when you're not right there
You've made me see
That love should be shared

That love is a wonder
That love should be held
As closely as you can
No matter what hell

And I don't mean to say
That being with you is bad
Because it isn't baby
Being with you makes me glad

Being with you completes
Where I alone cannot
The love I found with you
I would have never have thought

So thank you baby,
For all that you are
For being my baby
My bright shining star

I'm done trying to squeeze out drops of creativity
From my beaten, abused, and exhausted mind
I try writing words on my page
But they don't even rhyme

And as I slowly feel my wither
My sinking back to dust
I wonder who I can depend on;
I wonder who I trust

Not that I don't trust you
You, I, and trust just don't mix
It's not that I'm not friends with you
This just isn't worth it to fix

And I don't mean to offend you
Because I really would take offense
If I so much as touched your ego
And caused those cracks and dents

And I'm sorry for casting the rock
I couldn't see that you are glass
How was I supposed to know
Through you my rock would pass?

Was I supposed to know
Exactly what should happen?
Maybe so or maybe not
But away from me you're passing

I don't really want to let you go
Please take that as the truth
But frankly I've had enough of you
Begone, and take your youth

Leave your Youth of awe and wonder
And take the immaturity away
I really can't be subtle anymore
I DON'T WANT YOU TO STAY