Zack Phillips

Zack Phillips Mar 2014

She is

We just got through the toughest time
We made it out of the valley of death
We finally seem to be making things right
And then, again, it happens.
The worry
The aching heart
The tear-stained face
The devious mind
The thought of you with another
That's what sets me on edge
You act like you're innocent
When you're actually ignorant
You don't care why or how I feel or do
You just care about finding fun
You should care for me, you love me
Then again, I love you
It's okay for you to get jealous
Of course it is, it's fine
But God forbid I say my fears
Because it's fine, it always is
Just forget about the past
When you didn't love me too much
When you decided to choose another
When you tore out my heart
I can't just forget about them,
Though it is almost a year since
You're a prime target
It doesn't matter if you think you are or not
Because half the guys at the party
See you as prettier, which already you are.
I'm just stuck waiting around
For you to mess up
But don't worry, if you do
I love you
It's okay.

Zack Phillips Mar 2014

To You

I just realized your pain in this
You hid it down, where it was easy to miss
I glossed it over, distracted by mine
But then you told me, with tears in your eyes
You told me how rough it's been
You told me the demons you're fighting
You told me of love, and of kindness and spring
You told me of hate, and of suffering and fall
You told me the in-between in which you are caught
You told me not to worry, but I worry a lot.
You told me it's okay, when I know it isn't
I tell you it's okay, when I know it won't be
It can't be, can it?
That we so young
Can be so in love
Can feel so comfortable with each other
Can see the emotions written on our faces
Can long for the feeling of each other's embraces?
All that we have
It's so special, you see?
I feel like you're perfect
If only to me
Your face gleams so bright, when a smile adorns it
And when a frown appears, the world around you plummets
When I see this side of you, my heart falls
I feel like it's my fault
I'll do whatever you need
Whether leave or stay,
I just want you
To be happy some day

Zack Phillips Mar 2014

Around

Don’t worry baby
It will be alright
I gently rub your back
And say goodnight.
I walk out of your room
Down the hallway and stairs
Walk into the kitchen
I crack open a coke
And turn on the television
I stare at the screen
Distracted by what’s happened
Not listening to the death
Not listening to the races
Not listening to the sports
Not listening to the crimes
Not watching the dog chase its tail around and around
Watching that dog, realizing he’s me and you
While the dog’s excited about going around
We aren’t, and can’t be
Because the closer to our tail we get
The further from each other we are.
I’m preparing for the bite on the tail
But the dog keeps chasing
Around and around and
Around.

Zack Phillips Mar 2014

In a H.A.Z.E.

I Hate the way I feel
Hurt
Tired
Sad
Heartbroken
I’m Amazed that one person can do this to me
My love
My life
My baby
All gone away
So long Zack, I love you
It’s over
She’s done
Not happy
Neither of us now
I’m Ending this pain immediately
Gun
Rope
Pills
I’m forever gone.

Zack Phillips Mar 2014

What is "LOVE"?

The only person I want to talk to
Has left me, alone
I sit, mired in love
Aside from my sobs, I sit like a stone
My shirt's soaked wet
From my tears, and blood
I never thought it would end.
I never thought it would come like this
I never thought this gun would be in my hand
I never thought I'd think this again
I never thought this love would be over
Or my life.
BANG

Zack Phillips Mar 2014

Doesn't Matter

I promise I love you
But that doesn't matter
I want to be near you
But that doesn't matter
I cry myself to sleep over you
But that doesn't matter
I can't let go of you
But that doesn't matter
You don't love me
But that doesn't matter

Or does it?

Zack Phillips Feb 2014

Busy

It hurts when you're on your own
It hurts, you're all alone
You reach out to the friends you have
But they're not there.
They're busy.

You walk with your head down
You are embarrassed, you feel like a clown
You just need someone to confide in
But nobody's there
They're busy.

You burn the end of a cigarette
You feel riddled with regret
You need someone to be there
But they're not
They're busy

You sob harder than ever
You keep wishing it was forever
You cry out to your lover, 'Are you there?!'
But she's not
She's busy

Finally, a person appears
A person who will tend to your every need
You can't say anything
But he can.
The funeral director's busy.

Inspired by someone very close to me who told me they were too busy to let me be important in their life.