Eventually,
Everything will go back to how it was,
The depressed family from across the street.
Because my family can’t seem to get a break.
And you’ll leave too
Just like everyone else
You say you “Love” me
Then parade out of my life
Like it’s nothing.
You do your best to make me happy for a week or so
Then walk out.
That’s what everyone I have ever loved did.
They left
And you will too

Hi,
Um,
Can you hear me?
No, okay
That's fine,
No one hears me anyway
No one hears me cry
No one sees my pain
It's like im just nothing
Like this body, I walk in,
Is as small as a molecule
I feel like no one sees me
Or hears me
Everyone walks through my ghost
And don't even feel me.

Anxiety is like everyone is around you
But no one can hear you
Its like you’re trapped in your head
With nothing but your thoughts
And you won’t every say what you think
Because you’re too afraid that people will run the other way
Anxiety is like you’re drowning
But you’re too weak to move
It’s like,
There’s one person you love and talk to all the time
But you don’t tell them what you think
Because you don’t want to talk about it
Its a never ending feeling of worry
You’re scared all the time
You fear for the worst
Anxiety is the one thing that stays
Everybody leaves
But Anxiety stays.

We used to be so close.
A mother and a daughter laying in the daughter’s bed passing a ball back and forth talking.
I told you everything.
All my thoughts, all my fears, all my experiences.
I cried when you left, sobbed hoping if she’ll come back, when the truth was she wasn’t.
It tore me apart when you told me that.
I tried to put everything behind me, but it keeps me up at night.
At night, I wonder how a mother could verbally and physically abuse her daughter that she loves with all her heart,
But at the same time I don’t want to know.
That night repeats in my head daily, especially when I see someone with their hands on their throat.
It sends shivers down my spine and it destroys me all over again.
I love the time we had when we were younger.
The laughs, the talks, the games, the everything.
But now I think of you and it tortures me.
I’ve given you chances after chances to redeem yourself.
To be the mother you want to be.
But I’ve given you too many chances and you’ve hurt me too much.
I always thought it was my fault just because of how many times you’ve told me “Its all your fault”, until that night.
When I got snapped out of that trance you put me in.
The night I screamed and yelled at you of how ****** you could be and how much hurt, pain, and grief.
I hope you regret what you’ve done to my family.
You’ve bashed our pride.
You have embarrassed my family and how people can pick on me because of how they have seen how you treated us when you were drunk.
I remember how we used to be and I wish I could reverse time and stay in the moment of us being an actual family.

~Suki~

I cant think
I cant speak
I wanna scream
But when i open my mouth,
Nothing comes out
I just want to be okay
But i simply cant get a break from the pain

I honestly hate it here
The children’s screams when it’s time for recess,
The echo of lockers being shut constantly.
The voices of people who bring fear to my head.
The phone ringing on the wall.
The sounds of shoes hitting the floor.
I hate it
Im so tired being stuck in these doors of humanity.
I just wanna leave
I wanna be able to be home
But I also want to be happy
But we don’t get what we want
Do we?

Paper crown
Paper people
Paper thoughts
Paper cuts

Paper

All I need is paper
But everyone around me are tree stumps
Stumps that create a forest
A forest full of anxiety
A forest of depression




Help me