it’s harder than it seems
to hold in all your tears
the pain that’s added up
throughout all these years
i tried laying down
but i got in my head
the tears are rolling down
i just want to be dead
these thoughts keep popping up
that i’m not good enough
that i am all alone
i am not even known
i leave scratches on my arms
and imprints on my legs
with all these thoughts and actions
i’m bound to wind up dead
i imagine the fall
from a roof top way up high
before i hit the ground
it’s as if i can fly
i imagine active traffic
and wind up on the street
the breeze of passing cars
before i succumb to defeat
maybe dying hurts
or maybe it’s relief
its the high that happens right before
even though it must be brief
i want to feel that high
not knowing what will happen
it’s okay if i die
for i was only passing
this poem is what it’s like inside my head when i’m at my lowest. it’s to show people that they aren’t alone. and to those who don’t go through these thoughts, it’s to show you what it’s like to have them- an inside look.