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I look forward
to real smiles
to seeing friends I haven't seen in awhile
to looking into your eyes when you tell me I'm beautiful
And knowing it's true
to feeling loved
to feeling so full

I look forward
to frayed ends of ribbons tied together
to sashes and passion all about
to happiness and fairness
to being with a person who would understand
to having more than just my pen
I really
don't know
what to feel anymore.
Frustration, Anger, Sadness
Happiness, Shock and Surprise
That's what these past few days have been.
And things are just building and building up.
And I honestly don't know what to feel anymore.
How is it possible for someone to contain so much hatred?
To be able to haul his heavy load around on his shoulders
Yet manage to make himself appear weightless and untouched?

Why does he find it necessary to drag others down into the Earth
And attempt to suffocate them until they are a distant memory?
Place them in a noose and playfully wrap his fingers around the lever that equals
Life or death?

Did he sell his soul to the devil just so that he could have the unfathomable power
To search and destroy a person multiple times until they are less than dust?

Your desperate attempt to cause utter destruction,
To tear down every last brick that holds her heart together
Right down to the foundation of her love and compassion
Is causing a revolution.

**Remember how many soldiers stand against her while you are left to cower in the tallest tower, crafted by the loathsome and insidious hate that you have let consume you.
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