Exhale magic potion, put in motion
by frail bones and different tones
of grey
The world swirls gutter-wise and streets stink of ozone,
lyme
Time spent in the desert like
moonscape, powder like
sugar on your boots
Deep in my roots I can
feel a thirst, growing and
inevitable
How easily it
could all go
wrong

Please hold me until I pass out
These meds make everything go black
And I'm scared to go into the dark alone

Crafting gentle spells
Collecting worn shells
Finding new smells
With you

Broken glass mosaics in gutters and sidewalk cracks
Endless nights of glowing screens and quiet music
Long haired children with surfboards and cigarettes
I flick the ashes off mine in greeting to hollow eyed friends
Shaking from early morning hangovers
The clouds settling in low places among scrub hills
Ocean crashing reminds me I’m still human
Sand castle dreams viewed through broken windows
Pulled a thousand directions in a moment, comprehend none of it
Smiling for no reason when fingertips meet and eyes cascade radiance
Laughing in deep places with no expression
And out of our togetherness, there is profound silence
In dark concrete rooms with the smell of detergent
Unfolded clothing on the bed and empty bottles of gin
Words on the page, meant so much more last night
Now just scratches in ink and pencil, another idea to discard
Sparrows scatter from high lines and we take our first
breath

Gone asiatic, never look back kid
Tattoo gun fires, hard drive rewire,
wire splice space shift
Grabbing hot pans to get a grip
Black coffee goes drip drip drip
Can't touch that wiskey no more
not even a sip
Stacatto tip, flip, cashier check back track alley cat
Fat rat on the hunt for a *******, let the cheddar slide off
Rough, never soft, Egyptian cotton and musk
Done from dawn until dusk, bust out rustoleum rain drops
Grasshopper hops, and we still spinning
World on collision, course, of course we should be worried
Things are moving quickly but we're still all in a hurry
Take your time and eat lime and don't develop scurvy
Scurry, out from under, cockroach hot dog coach on the VA front lawn, blew his brain off
For what

Digging for thorns with toenail clippers
Picked scab scars, put there like dentures
We bent the whole frame out of whack
Combusting jet fuel with a straw
Alien in the claw machine game
Waving arms in the darkness, the strangle choke of nothing around you
We found two, heart and mind, not places to change but places to aim
Crumple up that trash, mix up your garbage, I'll show you mine
Peeling black tar decisions off stained concrete
The flies are buzzing on raw meat, landing in your mouth
Regurgitate an answer, make sure it's perfectly pronounced
Only chance of getting out

Up in those dry hills
Eating oranges, squeezing lemons
Fog like fingers in the morning,
billowing up the rattling crevasses
On the cusp of the cornice
Cutting cables in our recklessness,
our burning plastic dreams
Broken glass seams sewed together
with a blowtorch
Become one with the roach, the rat,
prepare to live and die like that

Bones in the rye field they sang, brittle stems of iron spreading leaves of
rust
A hidden look in watery eyes, secret sickness, ripping my guts
asunder
That space between midnight and morning when the world has been reduced
to monotone
In the blue-gray lucidity we sit, absorbed in cigarettes and gusting
wind
A few notes of Satie and I’m sitting in that blue room again, bamboo out the
window
Your voice like a finger running up my spine, singing to me, drowned out by
spring showers
Clay pots on the shelves, wilted sunflowers on the floor, grass pushing its way
through the floorboards
I step into falling rain, dream of sleep, dream of nothing, the blankness between
wakefulness
Hands carrying the scars of a thousand days, much like the day before, unconscious of
its passing
In tired two syllable words we exchange our hearts
In smiling kisses we pass each other breath, fresh like fertile ground split by
rugged plow
Black and white photographs in odd fitting drawers with cheap brass
handles
A pocket watch carried by many men before me, strewn upon stained counters
and newspaper clippings
I will these tired eyes to come to their senses, absorbed in a single word in a single
line
Losing their focus for minutes at a time, the sensation of drifting, the feeling of
fading
Like watercolor or lines in well-trod earth, shuffled into meaningless
harmonics
I still miss the sound of your violin, though you thought no one listened through
that ***** window
Scraps of Scriabin and Brahms, your symphonies saved me many a night
Such frail hands and white scalp, but you did not shake when bow met
fingers
Those nights of cheap Merlot, secretly stealing a moment of calm from your
skilled hands
The records never quite rivaled those nights, my unknown
friend

A hawk across swiftly sweeping clouds
Nimble nimbus, left to right, north to south
Fluid spraying out of mouth, moths meandering
Slandering ourselves, shelves growing empty
Last piece in your puzzle heart fitting gently
You lent me, a spark of empathy
A chance to see things differently

Grasshopper lights humming screams
Sonic ear drum bubblegum,
stuck on your new flip flops
& raindrops

All the China plates got used for pepper water
Soft grass tufts ripped from ground like broken thunder
You step into air conditioning and start shivering
You step into new pharmaceuticals and wonder who you are anymore
Wonder about the score of the game, no chance to remember
The outcome is an ember that will surely burn out
Like as a kid catching trout, cutthroat, brook, brown
Those rooster tail trebble types of sounds, 1/8th ounce
You get low, observe, wait, pounce, spider spinning silk sideways
Moon clocks in bug light cicada screaming
She brings the insect song to life, with her cold reflected photons
Step outside in the early morning and dance to the grasshopper music

Backlash into your bleeding muscle,
eviscerating the child in you
We crush our soda can lives into meaningless shape
Shimmy, shake, convulse and crack that back
Shooting down another frosted rack in the grass
Sloping sideways and out of line, honey eyed adder mouth
You're assimilating me and I love it

Sipping red juice, cigarettes leaf loose, filter tip flick brush fire
The truth from a liar, a bullet from a Steyr AUG, hitting meat
The mercy seat is open, we're still hoping on a miracle
Melts away like summer sun creamsicles, removed like tonsils
Swerve low sweet cherry fly, come on through let's get real high
Forget about the world and the hurdles jumped through to grow old and die
Constantly asking why, a species unwillingly born
Fire and scorn we rain down on one another, its life being taken from our species, our brothers
How many mothers have to outlast their children?
Instill in me some recipe for success, bless this next step off
The road used to be soft, but I can feel the potholes now
With a sudden bow we retreat to our lonely places
Screens replace faces and we talk less, less stress
Exhaling whatever type of smoke from your chest
Hummingbird feathers sewed into your vest
You bring out the best in me, give me sight to see
the possibilities

Another **** cigarette, feeling so wet
Caught in a net, Gladiator's last breath
Tridents and dents in your new car
Near, far, doesnt matter
Brain matter, grey spatter, 5.56
Pick up sticks, count ya licks
Feeling the icks, throw up tricks
Different clicks, different hips
Moving close, open up, close lips
Brand new rose, toes on sand
Feeling like a brand new man
Got nothing to put in a rubber band
Earn my meals with my right hand
Fog and smog and bog down
Pill down pharmaceutical pantyhose
Purple, the color purple, royal purple
Jalapenos and hot sauce on ya waffles
Syrup hot

In my cypress root home, it's slow water here
Red dots on my ears, no current, slow
The river flows, but I'm accustomed
My little root home will hide me
Moving in secret, quietly
Fanning my nest violently
Under tree swimming tiredly
They came with rods and hooks,
bent on their cruelty
Pulling me out of my river,
into their gaseous sea

Haiku is seven five seven.
Does that mean we leave things out?
Or leave it for interpretation?

Breaking up stones to see sea shell patterns
Staring at stumps to see rings degrading, slowly
Sitting on a cardboard box in an empty room
Blowing out my mind with mechanical precision
Today I wrote all my poems in a letter, sent them
to my father
Told him to open it if I didn't make it home
I want him to open that letter

I stubbornly waste time that could have been better spent
daydreaming
I quietly waste lines, fill them with ugly thoughts, should have
laid down the pen
Exhaling the last drag, sudden lightness, inevitably followed by
relentless heaviness
Eyes wide shut
I attempt to slow myself down, but my legs won’t allow it, my
hands plainly refuse it
Though my mind screams for it, fueled by caffeine & nicotine,
crashing & burning occasionally
Always resurrected by your memory, our memory
Faded & worn around the edges like boxes of old photographs,
collecting dust

Rains turned a blind eye, & the world dried to dust,
choked.
Then all the worms died, baking in cracked, rotten
soil.
When this is over, it'll be like we never really were in
the first place.
Just dirt, soon enough at least, when we find our place
among the worms.
No page will remember our names, who would care to
know them?
Another wave of life, pushed over the edge, into
the organic meat grinder, six feet under.
Do we keep breathing, this same breath, or do we
stop all together.
Do we walk on, or pause & listen to the
oceans crashing music.
Do we blink, or let our eyes dry, sitting behind
***** glass windows, watching it all cave in.
Endless streets, scattered faces, a million different
stories, untold.
I'd like to know the names of cavemen, to utter
them once again.
Just to say I didn't forget, just to pretend I
tried.
I saw your hand prints, outlines from smoke on
rocky walls.
I wish I knew your stories, your common words
& wisdom.
It's that way for every name through history,
recorded or otherwise.
If we took every misery suffered by man, and wrote a book,
would you read it?
Would you burn it?

Lost in this sea of voices, conflicting choices
Feeling boyish, light on my feet for once
Like all the blood rushed to my head
Existential dread, avoiding the color red
Heavier than lead in my shoes, just another fool
Warped and molded by partisan worldview
We simmer and we stew, little voices laughing
Talking about chemo and card games and Colorado
Where oh where do we go now, that the roads have all flooded

Oak tree brought me shade today
Dry mouthed dirt road slang, black lung
Hands reaching to me from above, oh lord
The hangman snaps his cord once more, sweet lord
One last smoke before I go, dear lord
Guess the sheriff got his way, sweet lord
Got nothing left to say once more, my lord
I just hope I feel no pain no more
Goodbye world, here I go, remember
we used to play together before?

This one wild eyed child,
with the breath like
gin,
those cedar branches between teeth,
those handfuls of eyes,
those broken whispers and spit on my eyelashes,
a kiss between a day broken like cigarettes in the package.

Could you make love to a series of words,
or a painting on the wall,
or maybe a laugh between ***** sheets where our skulls bounce off each other,
could you love a dead smile?

That ****** up flag flying
Is a waste of cloth!
Lower it immediately, a blanket now!
There is a man sleeping on the street, a sheet of cardboard!
Give him this lie of a sheet,
To wake up warm!

សួស្តី​សម្លាញ់
העלא מיין פרייַנד
اهلا صديقي
ওহে, বন্ধু আমার
ສະ​ບາຍ​ດີ​ຫມູ່​ຂອງ​ຂ້ອຍ
zdravo prijatelju
Salam dostum
नमस्ते मेरे दोस्त
Hola mi amigo
გამარჯობა მეგობარო
สวัสดีเพื่อนของฉัน

A quiet book of words, from a lonely man in his room
Her tiny voice, like pebbles rolling down a stream,
surrounded by pines
Sand between her toes, humming a song her mother used to sing,
forgot the words
Holding my head in your arms, blue little room, listening to
the wind chimes
Your bamboo forest, outside this ***** window, full of
ladybugs & grasshoppers
Green grass drying to hollow shells, snapped off by careless hands
Brushed away by gentle winds, spread among limestone & juniper
Standing barefoot on the paving stones, her toenails painted
yellow with black dandelions
A sip of iced tea, lemon, a bite of steamed rice
Trying to put a few thoughts together, letting the day simmer down
We'll sit together a while longer, listen to the crickets in the bamboo
Waiting, quietly waiting on your voice, the only thing
that keeps me dreaming anymore

White wings with brown circles
Plates of armor, black and orange
They discovered your weakness in the night
A ***** in your chitinous plate
All you sought was the shining fluorescent light
As you rested on the window sill
Now your wings flutter uselessly, a vain attempt
To fly away on morning breezes, all for naught
This cast iron tombstone, your final resting place
How dignified, you must think?
Dying on a piece of cheap lawn furniture
Don't worry; your broken wings will fly again
In the beaks of sparrows and crows

Southern pecan swing revelations
Water fuel souls, fresh pools of rain
Wild turkey 101, sipped neat
Cotton, not feeling like Hom/Sui
I'm taking charge
Thanks for caring
My Monday morning prayer rug coffee
Thanks, my mom loves you back
Paprika on everything
Folded funny page 94b

China cat writing on grandma's pearls
Quarters turned into penny slots
A tired little look at
2 pm

Where oh where did the
brews go my friend
Where oh where did the
cigarettes burn
out

A simple smile over coffee
in the morning
A simple brush of her
hair

Lying in long leaf clover
for hours

A simple connection between
the cortex
A bullet for comparison
Where is the jettison button
for all the built up
****

Dice and pink highlighters
on your dreary
afternoon

Could you spread some of that
love over here?

My love សំណព្វ saamnapv
For you សម្រាប់​អ្នក samreab anak
Grows like លូតដូចជា lout dauchchea
Flowers in morning ផ្កានៅពេលព្រឹក phka nowpel pruk

My heart បេះដូង​ខ្ញុំ behdaung khnhom
builds anthills កសាងអាកាស  ksang akasa
of memories នៃការចងចាំ nei kar changcham
you អ្នក anak

The everlasting now ជារៀងរហូតឥឡូវនេះ chea rieng rhaut ilauvnih
mine, yours អូនអើយឯង aun aey eng
friend មិត្តភក្តិ mitt phokte

Uncounted words on the page, attempting to mimic brilliance
Predictable as playing Russian roulette with an automatic
Forced sterility, impossible as drawing a straight line
The wrist won’t comply, simply cannot, no reason to attempt it
We fool ourselves with second hand ambition, discard our
own greatness
Quiet and sublime, carelessly letting our spark burn out
Do you remember what it was to be a child?
Nothing but used up memories with no sound
Black and white like some old movie, lips moving, no voice
Barefoot dreams are all that remain for me
Empty promises made to one’s self, surrendered so
easily
Nights of Bach on the radio, hiding behind closed doors and
cheap wine
Days of endless monotony, dark stairs and the smell of
scrubbed mildew
An afternoon spent in your arms, making love under the
pecan trees
I almost saw your yesterdays, beautiful creature, when I met your
eyes, laying there
A little girl, running with a sparkler in each hand, screaming her
defiance to the world
Holding onto what’s left of each other, two halves, trying to make a
whole

A child born in space,
looking down his entire life,
clean and untouched.
Does he become callous to the ones in the dirt?
Or does he pay them any mind at all?

Insert the question mark here?
Where is to far or to near?
Can we buy a ticket there and just go?
I'm finding the darkest spot to lick my wounds

Crying plastic tears,
killing old fears

Pent up,
bent shut needle,
**** em' out,
flamethrowers,
beast screaming behind sirens,
bronze bull belching souls,
little holes in the blackback sky,
every ice cream cone collectively hitting the concrete

Put out your front foot,
left leads,
lead loaded longways,
yourways,
all day blowing off cigarette tips

***** hands,
ghosts of t34's,
chainsaws screaming into the freezing night,
the moon lights green shattering,
crumbling,
burning,
hate filled eyes to justify whole countries enveloped in back arch agony,
working on our own little holocaust,
out of sight out of mind

"A man in honor who understands not is like a beast which perishes"

First purple page, plagiarizing plums crushed like candy between incisors
First new wave, going right over the reef with aquatic teeth
Wish me luck, tango la suerte y la magica
Listening to the Bosnian adhan, for fun, 2:14am
Stainless steel ice reservoir, killing for a taste of nicotine air
Got sick of chewing my smoke
Not dead broke quite yet, need a haircut and I'm set
It's a bet betting on me, make an investment and see
Tight lines at quarter time, spilling rhyme reasonless
**** your system, digest aggression, **** out plastic
Okinawa brig **** white woman tapped my back give me my shot God ******

Cross web interactions, herbs sold by fractions of the ounce
Light across the paving stones, home alone in the mote bath
Facing it once again, been putting it off to long
The stink of thawed blood on the cutting board
Hot hot peppers on the rim of your glass
Eyes in the ant lion holes boring tunnels
we are eating each other
bone by bone

Cold water hits your gut like a fist
eyes dumping mucus
Wipe me away, wipe me down the side
of your pants
Finding the intersecting point
pirouetting through the landmines

A walk through the woods with her
To a house with no fence,
a deep creek churning out back
That you must wade through
however fast it flows
however many stones
it turns

Crown Royal in a Coke can, warm rain fills the midnight blackness
Sitting on the flight deck among the tie-downs, staring into the wake
Something inside me says to jump, blind and mindless, deep into this Indian ocean


Rifles in a pile, triple canopy and palm groves
A beach made of trash
I stand in this screaming greenery, something inside me says to walk
Lose myself in this impenetrable, howling green


I wake to myself walking and talking, who was here in this body before me?
People speaking to a flipped mask
Words hollow as reeds in the snow
Something inside me writhes at this restlessness, beckons my head beneath the waves

Life rolls on even when you don't want it to
Trying to find the hidden mechanism of stillness
The thrill is gone, smoked up on the back porch
Holding wicked torch, lighting up lines of houses
Blouses held open to the wind, waiting on rain to send them running
Mumbling through gas station interactions, floorgaze reaction
Gaining traction through inaction, empty rattling boxcar soul
Always digging the hole a little deeper, one security, one sleeper

Feeling alright for the first time in a couple days
don't know if I'm intoxicated
or just numb

Broken vases, vaulted nights
days spent in the embrace
of blissful inaction

A pile of pillows
no thoughts
still

I found my center
but it decided
it needed a while
to find me back

With sureness we will fall

Hammers and tops and all

On this organic meatgrinder ball

It's either all in, or none at all

A streetlamp, spilling artificial brightness, illuminating my
exhaled cancer
Humming quietly, flickering off, on, distracting the moths
lazy tumble
Since April I’ve stared at this same scene, this field of
grit &  asphalt
Brimming with the glossy colored shells of vehicles, now silent
& dull with grime
Sickly yellow light cascading over them, automated, dead,
light
I remember the ocean, so very different to be out in it then
standing on the shore
Watching the swells through a maze of gray pipes, a window
into blue nothing
With a rifle in my hand, the very same I’ve held for many months
now
Sitting under the shade of boulders & netting, watching the
shadows rearrange themselves
Clothing stiff & stinking from my sweat, the dirt worked into my
skin
Wrapped in a poncho liner, boots left on, praying to stop thinking,
merciful sleep
Most nights I can find it with ease, but others, like tonight, it evades
me
At the edge of unconsciousness I am suddenly confronted by some voice
behind my eyes
Teasing me with memories I’m not sure are memories anymore, so much
as scenes from another’s life
Something long gone, like a smoking **** flicked away, or that first breath
on a September morning
Staring into a blue sky, Cardinals singing in the branches

Wise in worldly ways?
I'd rather be a fool
Who dies honest anyways

Every morning
If you feed me I grow, give me a drink & I die, what am I?
Either way
A lion must outrun a gazelle, a gazelle must outrun a lion
Sun
You had better be running
The sun is now
Do no harm and live!!
The poor have me, the rich want me, and I'm everywhere, what am I?
Guess the answer (It's nothing)
1. Paper money or coin
2. Love
3. Green herb
4. Peace
5. Togetherness
6. Money!
Hello life

Government policy on veterans: Give up or die
Don't give up or you will die
Tears in our eyes we fill up our
watercolor hearts with black gum
Oozing from pores, smell like ***** socks
Late night talks, how night talks to us
The truth will set you free
We stand in it, look out your back door
Use it or lose it, reason back in season
Typing on thin air, did a dime flat
Treating our veterans like that?
Like we commited Rwandan genocide attacks
Disrespect pinned to your chest like some sort of medal
Eat out of the trash, throw it away in the same **** can/bag
basil backdrops
These colors don't run

Black thrush magic, Sam told me 'bout it
Spit shining a T32, spiders hanging in the psych ward
Hard cores in rotten apples, illicit samples
Lines of camels in the desert, dive in head first
A drop of water in an open eyelid
I ran and hid
Can't find me
I can see, finally
A way out, forward, round about
Fillet of trout, cutthroat
A new demeanor called hope

Ladybug lovesongs, shorts, longs, Genghis Khans
It's raining outside, warm and gentle
Fresh lentil soup, rearrange, regroup the thinking piece
Find peace part in parcel, gray zone embargo, let's go
Swing the *** down the row, break your back for it
No ****, take a hit and pass it along, left or wrong
The Khan is coming out now, stomping through the mud
A cow chews her cud, the sky turns ice eyeball blue, Bailey
Hate me, I deserve it, tell me, I've probably heard it
Spit, throw your salt over your shoulder, shift that boulder
Mold over the wet bread slice, kimchi and rice
Sugar, spice, and everything spicy, like me, jalapeno tattoo'd on my arm
Does good, some harm, sound the alarm
Break the strong arm and be free
Self conscious in me, oh say can you see
By the setting of the sun, ants, plants, trails
Quails in flight, saying poison out of spite
Change your thoughts and change your life
Ladybug love songs, sing to me in your silence
Try this, I want your voice lifted to it
A note to hit, high point, max ordinate, advocates
Words of hate, washed clean with bar soap
Some hope, at this point, concise and contradictory
Dissect the diction, resurrect the dialect
Stand ***** in the face of flooding flashes
To make it in this country you need cash, kid.
Smoke a **** Winston down to the filter

The way it feels to be caught in the rain
brainwash dish toss, victory & loss, blood on the floss
Spit it out
We are deep in the forest & the sky is turning red
the animals are running white eyed, singed stink
Kids at the roller rink, trying to speak, to you &
you alone
Words spit in hostile tones when all we need is love
Like a dove with a BB in her heart
Tumbling tumbilina, Small as Thumbelina
I see ya, coming out of the dark, red sparks
Larks on the high line, fine wine, salt & brine
Crying out in the darkness simply to cry
Trying to figure out the reasons why,
why

A creek to the Brazos
Cold water at high speeds
The redemption of energy & strong saplings

When the last ship sinks
When the last lightbulb burns out
When the last car dissolves into rust
When the last word ceases to inspire
When the polarity of society is paramount
Divide and conquer, devour your brother
Accountability redacted, values subtracted
Like the rat king, tails tied
Merrily tossed into the incinerator

The devil is crawling up my leg, going through all my pocket change
**** through the grate, be grateful for a place
Black coffee laced with space case tablets
Bad **** builds habits of being sneaky
They'll never see me, we all tell ourselves
I'll be the lucky one
No fun, the sun runs you down regardless
Artless, choking on plastic, snap like worn elastics
Rubber bands and lucky charms on your wrist
Another name to add to the list of lost
Looking to the future, the past hurts lots
Come together, somersault, a species collectively at fault
No more violence, or blame blame blame, more of the same ****
Sending our kids off to die
We owe it to them to try

I'm afraid of the dark but I've been there to long to care
Just be scared always
What's gonna happen next
I can't see
They're coming for me
With longrifle dart dumpers
Chest thumpers,
two in the heart, one in the mind
Brain matter unwinds on stained sidewalk
No room for talk, only business
Wish I could go back to that kid ****

*****
Mood stabilizers
Anti-psychotics
Xanax
Silence never felt to heavy

Just don't stop coward
Write what's in your heart
Like a doe leaping over fences
Entrails, somehow it fits
Snow on the lawn in Texas
A ****** salt nose dripping on lips
A first kiss in a creek surrounded by mule deer

Two spaces between each empty place
How do they get their names on
The **** bottle

Sitting on Orchard road, in front of the towers
Waiting for a friend or two
The six pack turning warm in its plastic bag
Taking sips under an umbrella in the rain
Espresso and Guinness
**** me for trying

Under the pretty lights tonight
again and again
Under the canopy, green and screaming
give us rain
Simple beast has found his fragility
incarcerate my soul
A blank spot in the road, driving
manic teleportation
At new station biting at broke ends
good friends lost
Texas late winter frost, gutters breathing
constrict and confuse
The men in silk shoes are climbing the ravines
little shaded souls
So many names forgotten to time
why keep track
Lost sideways in the skylarking way
train track trek
I been and I slept
on to many **** rocks
Brothers lost, like clockwork
fighting overseas, forgotten
I cannot unlive this, unsee
my comrades leave me
like empty pitchers
in the night
morning mourning