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Third Mate Third Aug 2014
A lot of people think they can write or paint or draw or sing or make movies or what-have-you, but having an artistic temperament doth not make one an artist.


Even the great writers of our time have tried and failed and failed some more. Vladimir Nabokov received a harsh rejection letter from Knopf upon submitting ******, which would later go on to sell fifty million copies. Sylvia Plath’s first rejection letter for The Bell Jar read, “There certainly isn’t enough genuine talent for us to take notice.” Gertrude Stein received a cruel rejection letter that mocked her style. Marcel Proust’s Swann’s Way earned him a sprawling rejection letter regarding the reasons he should simply give up writing all together. Tim Burton’s first illustrated book, The Giant Zlig, got the thumbs down from Walt Disney Productions, and even Jack Kerouac’s perennial On the Road received a particularly blunt rejection letter that simply read, “I don’t dig this one at all.”

So even if you’re an utterly fantastic writer who will be remembered for decades forthcoming, you’ll still most likely receive a large dollop of criticism, rejection, and perhaps even mockery before you get there. Having been through it all these great writers offer some writing tips without pulling punches. After all, if a publishing house is going to tear into your manuscript you might as well be prepared.

1. The first draft of everything is ****. -Ernest Hemingway
2. Never use jargon words like reconceptualize, demassification, attitudinally, judgmentally. They are hallmarks of a pretentious ***. -David Ogilvy
3. If you have any young friends who aspire to become writers, the second greatest favor you can do them is to present them with copies of The Elements of Style. The first greatest, of course, is to shoot them now, while they’re happy. – Dorothy Parker
4. Notice how many of the Olympic athletes effusively thanked their mothers for their success? “She drove me to my practice at four in the morning,” etc. Writing is not figure skating or skiing. Your mother will not make you a writer. My advice to any young person who wants to write is: leave home. -Paul Theroux
5. I would advise anyone who aspires to a writing career that before developing his talent he would be wise to develop a thick hide. — Harper Lee
6. You can’t wait for inspiration. You have to go after it with a club. ― Jack London
7. Writing a book is a horrible, exhausting struggle, like a long bout with some painful illness. One would never undertake such a thing if one were not driven on by some demon whom one can neither resist nor understand. — George Orwell
8. There are three rules for writing a novel. Unfortunately, no one knows what they are. ― W. Somerset Maugham
9. If you don’t have time to read, you don’t have the time — or the tools — to write. Simple as that. – Stephen King
10. Remember: when people tell you something’s wrong or doesn’t work for them, they are almost always right. When they tell you exactly what they think is wrong and how to fix it, they are almost always wrong. – Neil Gaiman
11. Imagine that you are dying. If you had a terminal disease would you finish this book? Why not? The thing that annoys this 10-weeks-to-live self is the thing that is wrong with the book. So change it. Stop arguing with yourself. Change it. See? Easy. And no one had to die. – Anne Enright
12. If writing seems hard, it’s because it is hard. It’s one of the hardest things people do. – William Zinsser
13. Here is a lesson in creative writing. First rule: Do not use semicolons. They are transvestite hermaphrodites representing absolutely nothing. All they do is show you’ve been to college. – Kurt Vonnegut
14. Prose is architecture, not interior decoration. – Ernest Hemingway
15. Write drunk, edit sober. – Ernest Hemingway
16. Get through a draft as quickly as possible. Hard to know the shape of the thing until you have a draft. Literally, when I wrote the last page of my first draft of Lincoln’s Melancholy I thought, Oh, ****, now I get the shape of this. But I had wasted years, literally years, writing and re-writing the first third to first half. The old writer’s rule applies: Have the courage to write badly. – Joshua Wolf Shenk
17. Substitute ‘****’ every time you’re inclined to write ‘very;’ your editor will delete it and the writing will be just as it should be. – Mark Twain
18. Start telling the stories that only you can tell, because there’ll always be better writers than you and there’ll always be smarter writers than you. There will always be people who are much better at doing this or doing that — but you are the only you. ― Neil Gaiman
19. Consistency is the last refuge of the unimaginative. – Oscar Wilde
20. You must stay drunk on writing so reality cannot destroy you. ― Ray Bradbury
21. Don’t take anyone’s writing advice too seriously. – Lev Grossman
image – christine zenino
Taken from the Internet
Qualyxian Quest Oct 2021
She thought I chopped down the fairy tree
But I just planted it somewhere else

She'll have to fly from Dublin
Visit the American South

Drive on up to Chicago
Move by word of my mouth

Catch a train to Jersey
Then back to the Book of Kells

See you in Seattle
In Toledo the Witherells

          Savages, Ishmael
Qualyxian Quest Mar 2019
By train from Boston to Buenos Aires
            reading to blind Borges
                  to make you see.
Qualyxian Quest Aug 2020
Boston to Buenos Aires by train
Reading in English to blind Borges
    Theroux breaks through
Qualyxian Quest May 2020
Paul Theroux in Africa
Paul Theroux in Argentina
Paul Theroux in the Deep South


                    Travelin' Man
Qualyxian Quest Aug 2020
No deer tonight
Just a brief alone moment at the church

Saw a blue winged bird last week
Flying, barely perched

Roaches crawl across the cement
Rabbits in the night

Insects buzzing in the trees
Fireflies alight

                   To make you see
              A good reason to write
Qualyxian Quest Mar 2020
Boston to Buenos Aires
        Blind Borges
              Bien!
Qualyxian Quest Jan 2020
trains from Boston to Buenos Aires
     In El Salvador - soccer: more!
             gracias y por favor ...


               he makes me see.
Qualyxian Quest Aug 2021
I learned the truth of women
It isn't very pretty
Here comes the rain
Dialogue, Plato

Xanthippe was a shrew
C'mon, Kiss me Cate
I like Paul Theroux
At least the way he writes

It's meaningless this life
Still we have to live it
Will we meet again?
No, I don't think so

Virginia is for lovers
And for losers too
Took the Tucson Train
Saw the Phoenix Lights

             Goodnights!
Qualyxian Quest Jul 2023
4:54
Inner Harbor, Baltimore
Buddhist neither/nor
Kobayashi Maru

The American Abyss
******* times like this
Beg your pardon, Miss
Do wah Diddy do

Traveling to Siem Riep
Promises to keep
Visions in my sleep
Reading Paul Theroux

Americans unaware
Some people stop and stare
Way up in the air
Horton Hears a Who

                Do you?
Qualyxian Quest Dec 2022
Journalist: Why do you write?

Paul Theroux: To make you see.
Qualyxian Quest Dec 2022
The African Continent
Lions on the beach
Paul Theroux
The Georgia Peach

*** bop a loo bop
A lop bam boom
Robert Johnson
I believe I'll dust my broom

Me and Jay
Franklin Street
UNC
Conrad Complete

Cornel West
Shiloh church
Chimes of Freedom
Silent Search

             Atlanta
Qualyxian Quest Mar 2023
Morningless sleep
That's what Epicurus called death
A Republican wetdream
Nobody Woke

What Americans value most is money
All those SUVs
Doctors with degrees
George W. Lied. Nobody spoke.

Avatar 2 was boring
Paul Theroux's Deep South
Buy a sword
Sell your cloak

Mr. David Markson
Viva Mexico!
Senyor Santayana yo ...
Alone. Tired. Old. Sick. Broke.
Qualyxian Quest Oct 2019
Paul Theroux travels Deep South
      As with Boston to Borges, words in my mouth
                      To make you see - quite vivid throughout …


                                       the Reader
Qualyxian Quest Feb 2021
the devious human race
unkind, unjust, untrue

nowhere to escape
kinda like Covid flu

autumn in Kyoto
Reno sky of blue

Boston to Buenos Aires
by train with Paul Theroux

to make you see. you.
Qualyxian Quest Dec 2021
She speaks to me in Spanish
Soon to Mexico
Gracias Ms. Anya
Maybe one day I too go

I have been to Ireland
Book of Kells with my sons
Snow pubs in Chicago
In Carolina Born to Run

Read Paul Theroux
Boston to the blind Borges
Trains to Argentina
El Salvador:  who could guess?

Two years in Taiwan
Took the Taipei trains
Now the fight is on
Still never been to Spain

                Poetry
            Good Insane
Qualyxian Quest Aug 2021
Traveling makes you realize
Your country is not the only way

Others do it different
Others say xie xie

I've traveled in 18
Lived in three or four

Stockholm to Copenhagen
Oxford not Elsinore

I'm not Marco Polo
But I have read Paul Theroux

Boston to Buenos Aires
Bangkok breaking through

                    72
Qualyxian Quest Sep 2020
Paul Theroux's answer to the question

Why do you write?

(And a good answer too)
Qualyxian Quest Sep 2020
I have no interest in astrology
But I do have mystic madness

And I do listen to the stars
To ameliorate my sadness

Speaking of Emilyorate
She's my kindred spirit

For now I live alone
Please help me not to fear it

Mystic is like mystery
The closing of the mouth

Eliade was right about history
Paul Theroux right about the South

                    Embers.
           Please don't go out.
Qualyxian Quest Sep 2020
Rick Steves in Europe
Paul Theroux in Deep South
Me in Asia

                 Traveller's Tales
Qualyxian Quest Aug 2020
Interviewer:  Why do you write?

Paul Theroux:  To make you see.
Qualyxian Quest Aug 2020
Dear Mr. Fantasy
From my best friend Mark

James Taylor in Chapel Hill
Batman in the dark

Europe I found fascinating
Asia has the rains

Paul Theroux from Boston
To Buenos Aires on the trains

The Catholic Church gives me gifts
And wounds me with its words

I sit in the brown chapel
St. Francis, have you heard?

           I'm a theonerd.
I have you in mind, attentive reader,
As I try to tell a life
Take the ball and score
Left handed off the glass

I have been to New York
Man of La Mancha
Central Park picnic
Barefoot in the grass

Theroux not Thoreau
Old Patagonia Express
Jorge Luis Borges
I no longer go to Mass

Un escritor
Indian food for lunch
Basketball at night
The beauty of her ***


               Patience...
Qualyxian Quest Jul 2020
Boston to Buenos Aires
        Blind Borges
       Paul Theroux

               Y tu?
California snow
Florida thunder rain
Inner Harbor, Baltimore
I ride the Downbound Train

Dublin was the post office
And the Book of Kells
I was in Poland once
Tolkien loved the elves

Taipei American School
Delicious won ton soup
I frequently breakdown
Let us now regroup

Paul Theroux's travel books
The Writer's Almanac
Nixon destroyed Cambodia
George W. destroyed Iraq

             That's a fact, Jack.
Qualyxian Quest Jul 2020
Paul Theroux
Deep South
Then he said unto them ...
Ryan O'Leary Apr 2020
This was my exclamation
when I heard that Kim was
dead, could not can not will
not believe it and Trump still
alive, there is no justice in the
world especially after the bleach
business and all the other stupid
things he has said and done.

North Koreans are The Irish of Asia
according to Paul Theroux, so that
can't be bad.

Hopefully Kim resurrects like the
Phoenix.

— The End —