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Mors Spiritualis

Spiritual *******
who is to blame
The prophets the poets
lascivious shame

With prurient verses
stark naked their prose
Defaming what’s ******
their lust to impose

And when they have finished
exposing their ruse
They choke on its meaning
and die self-abused

(Rosemont College: February, 2024)



Divinity’s Pew

The truth stands in contrast
to only itself
Once mentioned eternal
when thought and then felt
It lives in the ether
past fortune or fame
Conscripted by conscience
no praise and no blame
The truth beyond reason
beyond lies or consent
The lucky among us
to follow its scent
Its trail leads to faith
divinity’s pew
Transforming the moment
— you first say I do

(Rosemont College: February, 2024)



Freezing The Moment

Are you the
lead actor
within your own myth

The script
ever changing
the past in its crypt

Can you freeze
the moment
with only one word

The Angel’s
applauding
— the devil unheard

(Rosemont College: February, 2024)



Salt Lick

Politicians
endow a sword
to the few
— to command the many

(Rosemont College: February, 2024)


Modern Education

Learning more
about less and less
Feeling torn
in great duress
Faith attacked
we hide from myths
Real love scorned
— ourselves we kiss

(Rosemont College: February, 2024)


Marx In Hell

Political salvation
the god of failure
Beatifying the collective
— on the devil’s throne

(Rosemont College: February, 2024)


Gnostic Dreams

The brighter the glare
we discover around us
The darker the light
stays hidden within
Secular salvation
a digital failure
God’s imminent nature
— indistinguishable from ours

(Rosemont College: February, 2024)


‘Sage To The Court Jester …’

God’s truth — Man’s truth
bridging the difference
trust in the Muse

(Rosemont College: February, 2024)
Kurt Philip Behm Jun 2022
The Ocean has no conscience,
no judgment, joy, or hate

She dances with you to her beat
in stirring waves of fate

With reverence you may enter
all blessings on the day

But just one slip and she reminds
what ancient mariners say…

“Red sky at morning, sailors take warning
red sky at night, sailors delight”

Her message best taken when early to bed
life in the balance, her power to dread

(Rosemont Pennsylvania: June, 2022)
Kurt Philip Behm May 2019
Within every verse,
  many meanings reside

The reader determines
  in which couplet you hide

The words both descriptive
  with colors aglow

The eyes as important
  as what the ears know

When backed in a corner,
  don’t ever explain

Words beckon discovery,
  refusing one name

The same reader may leave
  with a differing view

Each time he goes over
  and finds something new

A question once opened
  can never be closed

And verse penned inherent
   forever to know

With time of no consequence,
  your poetry waits

For the next searching pilgrim
  —your words to relate

(Rosemont Pennsylvania: May, 2019)
Kurt Philip Behm Apr 2022
A bottle of you was not enough,
I needed the whole case
With every drop and fragrance let,
uncorking my embrace

To deeply breathe your sweet perfume
and drown in nectars dew
I try to sip but lose myself
—inside your vineyard true

(Rosemont Pennsylvania: April, 2022)
Kurt Philip Behm Dec 2023
Prisoner Of Language

Will time live eternal
or just its retelling
A prisoner of language
whose paradox mined

Dimension in contrast
ill-fated contrition
To look but not touch
—and hope they align

(Rosemont College: December, 2023)



Through A Vacuum

Biologically tethered
time is the demon
Your flesh and your blood
by nature defined

Each tic of the clock
your heart beats in cadence
Dogmatic in method
caught up in the brine

What if your consciousness
took a leap forward
Abandoning reference
erasing the lines

Polarity exits
its jail through a vacuum
Releasing reversing
—becoming sublime

(Rosemont College: December, 2023)

Starting Over

Dig up the foundation
requestion each premise
Wade through the bathwater
the baby must go

A leap when it’s quantum
still subject and object
Fly out of the portal
—rejecting what’s known

(Rosemont College: December, 2023)
Kurt Philip Behm Dec 2021
I rest in the memory
of things that I’ve loved
where time is not finite
below or above
These pockets of joy
hold the key to my fate
as the dreams of my father
in slumber gestate
To live past tomorrow
diving deep in the past
with time still a ******
the moment to last
And rise resurrected
each day with the sun
knowing fortune awaits me
—when sleep again comes

(Rosemont Pennsylvania: December, 2021)
Kurt Philip Behm Jul 2021
Paper may burn,
but vision lives on

In ashes of memory
—and words to a song

(Rosemont Pennsylvania: July, 2021)
Kurt Philip Behm Jun 2022
California Dreamin…
Momma Told Me Not To Come
By The Time I Get To Phoenix
Will Anybody Really Know What Time Has Spun

Hotel California…
Its Chain Gang wearing thin
Searching for an American Woman
Blowin In The Wind

Bill Bojangles Robinson…
preaching Fire And Rain
New York’s A Lonely Lonely Town
dragging Ball And Chain

Summertime Blues and Porgy’s drowning…
Riders On The Storm
Layla kisses Judy Blue Eyes
Stairway To Heaven scorned

Woodstock and a Big Bear Scrambler…
Who’ll Stop The Rain
Don’t Think Twice this Hard Day’s Night
Eli’s Comin again

Hey Jude, Moondance is calling…
It’s Too Late says Ms. King
Yesterday’s Hound Dog barking Crazy
—the Purple Haze begins

(Rosemont College: June, 2022)
Kurt Philip Behm Dec 2021
When writing the words,
are they thought or then felt
Which to come first,
cards different once dealt

But sometimes together,
as in straights or a flush
They win back the reader
—with more than potluck

(Rosemont College: December, 2021)
Kurt Philip Behm Feb 2021
For now, I want to see your face,
and gaze into your eyes

To hear your voice within my ears
—I’ll text you when I die

(Rosemont Pennsylvania: February, 2021)
Kurt Philip Behm Oct 2022
Filled up again
words pour out
Empty no longer
they whisper and shout

Life’s give and take
torrent to drought
The tide and the flow
—flooding the doubt

(Rosemont College: October, 2022)
Kurt Philip Behm Oct 2022
Causality before truth
truth before causation
Universal in transference
inextricably defined

An atom of veracity
a little bit pregnant
Plato through Lewis
—reality entwined

(Rosemont College: October, 2022)
Kurt Philip Behm Dec 2021
The script of experience,
endorsing our wills
banking our choices,
paying our bills

Crediting our memory
for what lies ahead
debentures of faith
the black and the red

A ledger retallied,
both columns in sync
the plus and the minus,
indelible ink

Its summary left open,
all errors erased
with loans to push forward
—new funding in place

(Rosemont College: December, 2021)
Kurt Philip Behm Oct 2022
Older than you were
younger than I am
Your memory grows inside me
keeper of the flame

Each day we spent together
our boyhoods reassured
Connected to forever
—we never asked for more

(Rosemont Pennsylvania: October, 2022)
Kurt Philip Behm Nov 2021
The magnitude of ignorance
staggers beyond
the scope of imagining,
a weakening throng

The danger of assumption,
its dual cutting edge
empowers deception
shoved over the ledge

The vacuums of denial
we fight to defend
are lost in the moment
pushed out to the end

This emptiness we carry
and knowledge we fear
footnote our destruction
—as fools shed a tear

(Rosemont College: November, 2021)
Kurt Philip Behm Dec 2021
Waiting for the music,
naked and alone
the words become orphans,
unsung and unknown

The letters in limbo,
each phrase nether blown
with melody absent
—the magic disowned

(Rosemont College: December, 2021)
The woman in the blue Chevy said: “Just five dollars please,” as I pumped two more dollars of Sunoco 260 into the aging four door sedan.  As she paid me and then left, I looked at the Croton Chronograph Watch on my wrist that I had gone into hock for last fall.  5:15, SHOOT!!!, I only had 45 minutes to jump on my bike and make it the fifteen miles back to West Philadelphia to class.

I was taking night courses at St Joseph’s College (St Joseph’s University now), and my first class started at 6:00 p.m.  Why? I asked myself again did I always cut it so close?  Deep inside I knew the answer, but I told myself it was because I was a good employee.  I had been pumping gas and renting U-Haul Trucks at an Arco gas station in North Hills Pa. for the past two years. The station was open till 6 p.m. every day, and it seemed I never got out of there until after 5.

It was owned by a good friend of mine, Bob, whom I had met in Ocean City New Jersey while living in the rooming house that he and his wife Pat owned at 14th street and Asbury Ave.  Every day at five o’clock, Bob would yell out to me on the gas island — “time to leave!” He knew how long the ride was back to school during rush hour and that I never seemed to get out by 5.

The real answer as to why I was always late was that I liked the challenge. I loved the ride through the small section of Fairmount Park and then the river town of Manayunk always trying to get back to my apartment at 54th and Woodland Ave in the Overbrook section of Philadelphia before six.  54th and Woodland was right across the street from St Joe’s, and I would literally race into the driveway in front of my apartment house, drop the bike’s kickstand run inside to change and then head for class.  Many times, I would not even change out of my Arco jumper (uniform) before heading over to campus.  I often didn’t have the time.  I wondered what some of the other people, especially girls, must have thought of the strange aroma that I brought to the class on the nights when I didn’t change.

            To Their Credit, No One Ever Complained

I had always secretly wanted to road-race motorcycles, and this twenty-minute ride both to and from work every day gave me a chance to indulge my fantasy.  Tonight, I would be cutting it very close and not even have time to stop at my apartment.  I would have to park under the tree in front of my classroom building and run up the stairs to the third floor and do it all before six o’clock. It was an advanced Philosophy class, Ethics and Morality, and the professor, Dr. Larry McKinnon closed the doors promptly at six.  If you were late, you didn’t get in — no exceptions!

I raced through the park on Bells Mill Road and hit the cobblestone hills of Manayunk with 15 minutes still left on my watch.  I then raced up City Line Ave and caught only one red light as I saw the lights of 54th and City Line straight ahead. The light was yellow as I leaned over hard and made the left turn on 54th St. I raced up past the basketball arena and turned right on Woodland Ave. I would normally have gone straight a half block to my apartment, but I had cut it too close and didn’t have the time. I pulled up in front of the Villiger Building, chained my bike to the tree I always used, and ran for the stairway door around back by the track.

This building had no elevator, so it was up two flights of stairs to the top floor and then left down the hall to where my classroom was the one farthest on the right.

As I rushed through the back door of Villiger, the first flight of stairs was blocked.  An elderly man with a Gulf Oil Hat on was struggling to pull his son in a wheelchair up the 26 stairs.  He had the entire stairway blocked, and I had less than two minutes to get by him and into McKinnon’s class.   His son in the wheelchair was in really bad shape.  He was in a total body brace that went clear to his head, and as he looked down at me, I heard him say: “Hey Moose, grab the front, and we’ll both make it to McKinnon’s class before he shuts the door.”

With that, I grabbed the small front wheels and lifted, as we both carried the wheelchair up the two flights of stairs to the third floor.  We entered the hallway just as Dr. McKinnon was shutting the door.  The kid in the wheelchair yelled out, “Wait for us Doc” as we raced for the closing door.  I took the handles of the chair away from his dad and pushed the chair inside.  We had made it but not any too soon.

I wondered to myself if McKinnon would have denied entry to this kid who had been stricken with polio if he had arrived just two minutes later. It would have taken at least that long if his dad had tackled those stairs alone.  I parked his wheelchair next to my desk on the far left as the professor started his lecture.  When it was over, I pushed his wheelchair outside to where his dad was waiting.

“Ed Hudak,” his father said, “and this is my son Eddie.  Thanks so much for helping us up the stairs. I got out of work late and had to race home to the Northeast section of Philadelphia, pick Eddie up, and then race back down here to get him to class.”  Mr. Hudak worked at the Gulf Oil Refinery in South Philadelphia.  To leave work at four o’clock and get all the way up to the Northeast, pick up his crippled son, and then race back down to West Philadelphia made the little twenty-minute jaunt that I did every day seem like child’s play.

His son Eddie then asked me where my next class was. “Dr Marshall’s ‘Rational Psychology,’ I told him” as he said, “mine too, you can push me over there and my dad can go to the student union and get something to eat and rest for a while.”  School had only started last week, and somehow I had missed seeing this crippled kid in both of my classes.  He told me he had seen me though because of the strange jumper I had on and the helmet I carried into class.  When he told his father about me his dad said: “That kid must work in a gas station and be paying for school himself.  Cut him some slack if he doesn’t look real presentable on those days when he’s late.”

Eddie and I finished both classes together and I got ready to push him back outside.  As we passed the vending machines on the first floor, I told him that this was where I usually stopped to have dinner before going home.  He asked me, “What’s your favorite?” and I told him, “the Dinty Moore beef stew.”  The machine had three different varieties and that was usually all I had until breakfast the next day.  Eddie said he would like to wait while I ate and that his father would be fine outside for a few more minutes.  He seemed to know something about our new relationship that would take quite a bit longer for me to discover and sort out.

                  Eddie Always Seemed To ‘Just Know’

I asked Eddie what his major was, and he said Literature, and that he had been a student here for almost six years.  Again, I wondered, how could I have missed him in that wheelchair with someone always pushing him to where he needed to go?  I hoped I hadn’t refused to see him in his diminished condition with my eyes always looking away.  These kinds of things always bothered me, and I was squeamish around handicapped people, especially children. My mother had volunteered at the St. Edmond’s Home For Crippled Children in Rosemont for many years, but I was still uncomfortable when I saw those kids, not much younger than I was, in wheelchairs and leg braces.

                Eddie’s Condition Was Much Worse

The only thing handicapped about Eddie was his body. His mind and spirit were stronger than any five, so-called, normal people.  His father had made sure of that.  His dad had been racing from work to home and then to school for almost six years devoting whatever spare time he had to what his son wanted to accomplish.  He would drop Eddie off at class and then, most nights, go sleep in his car in the school parking lot.  Many nights, the temperature in that parking lot was below freezing, but this sixty-year-old man NEVER complained.


        Who Was Really Handicapped, Eddie Or Me?

As much as I marveled at how well Eddie did in spite of being disabled, his father amazed me even more.  He was like so many heroes that we never hear about standing off in the shadows so that someone else can thrive.  After I finished my stew, I pushed Eddie outside to where his dad was waiting.  He shook my hand and said: “Son, without your help tonight, we’d have really been in a terrible fix.”

                               He Called Me “Son”

As I watched him wheel Eddie back toward their car in the parking lot, I pushed my long hair back and pulled my helmet over my head.  The chinstrap I left unbuckled on these short rides because it always got tangled in my beard.  I rode the two short blocks back to my apartment with the sight of Eddie and his dad burned into the front of my psyche.  I knew I had witnessed something special tonight, I just didn’t know yet how special it truly was or would then become.

Now, I had an entirely new reason for getting to school on time.  I was not going to let that diminutive older man pull that wheelchair up those stairs one more time — not if I could help it.  I was never late again for the rest of that semester, as Eddie and I became fast friends with he and his dad even visiting my apartment on more than one occasion.  I became a real master at pulling that sled of his up the stairs, and we often got help from other male students as we made the climb.

Eddie told me in confidence one day that I had been good for his dad.  I thought he was referring to the physical exertion I had save him, and Eddie said: “No, it’s more than that. My dad has never liked anyone with long hair and a beard, and he told my mother the other night that you were the first.  He then went on to say that maybe it was just hair and that he shouldn’t let things like that bother him anymore.”  I was both flattered and gratified that he saw something in me, something that I still may not have seen in myself.

Mr. Hudak had been a World War 2 veteran and participated as a Chaplain’s Assistant in such major conflicts as D-Day and The Battle Of The Bulge.  His Jeep had sunk in deep water during the D-Day landing, and he and the Chaplain had to swim two hundred yards to shore amidst enemy fire.  He was a great man in the tradition of all great men who provide unselfish and heroic service while asking for nothing in return. In many ways, I secretly wished that he had been my dad too.  

My father had also been in World War 2 as a Marine and fought many engagements in the South Pacific.  He was a hero to me, but the difference between my father and Mr. Hudak was, my dad loved me, but he didn’t seem interested in my life now.  He didn’t approve of my studying Philosophy, and he couldn’t understand why I hadn’t chosen a more conventional career path like the sons of so many of his friends.

  In Ways I Couldn’t Understand, I Think I Embarrassed My Father

What my dad didn’t know was, that underneath the long hair and beard, my beliefs were a little to the right of Attila The ***. Unfortunately, we never had a serious conversation where he could have discovered that.  

The semester finally came to an end and the Christmas holidays were now upon us.  It was cold weather to be riding a motorcycle but, when that’s all you have. then that’s what you ride. On the last day of class before break, Mr. Hudak pulled me aside.  “My wife Marge and I are having a little party next Saturday night, and we’d like you to come.”  Everything inside me was trying to find an excuse not to go, but all I was capable of was shaking my head yes and thanking this great man for the kind invitation.

It wasn’t that I didn’t want to meet his family. It was that I literally had nothing to wear and only the motorcycle to get me there.  My entire wardrobe consisted of two pairs of jeans, three t-shirts, and one beige fisherman’s knit sweater that I had bought at a local discount store.  I still hadn’t worn the sweater, and the tags were still on it.  I kept telling myself I was saving it for a special occasion.  Well, what could be more special than meeting Mr. Hudak’s family. The afternoon of the party I removed the tags from the sweater and ran down to the Laundromat and washed my newest jeans.

Eddie had told me that the get together would start around seven, but I could arrive anytime I wanted.  As I pulled the motorcycle up in front of their brick row house, I looked for a place to park the bike where it wouldn’t stand out. I already looked like a child of the sixties, and the motorcycle would only give them something else to focus on that might be misleading.

My fears were totally unfounded as I walked through the front door.  Mr. Hudak greeted me warmly, as Eddie yelled out in a voice all could hear: “My buddy Kurt’s here.”  My buddy Kurt! Those words have stayed with me and have provided sustenance during times when I thought my life was tough.  All I had to do in those moments was think of Eddie and what he and his family had been through, and my pity party for myself ended almost quicker than it began.

                         “My Buddy Kurt’s Here”

No sooner did I wave to Eddie than Mrs. Hudak came bouncing out of the kitchen.  Literally bouncing! This tiny woman of 5’1’’ came bounding across the dining room floor and immediately reached up and threw both of her arms around my neck.  She squeezed hard and it felt good.  It was real and she wanted me to know that.  Eddie had also explained to me how physically strong his mother was. It was the result of having to carry him up and down two flights of stairs from his bedroom to their recreation room in the basement below.  She did this several times a day.

I don’t know how high the heat was set to in their house that night, but I had never felt so warm — or accepted.  To an outsider like me it even looked like love, which I was to find out shortly is exactly what it was.  I wanted to take my heavy sweater off, but I had nothing on underneath but an old t-shirt.  Mrs. Hudak’s name was Marge, and she was from an old Irish family named McCarty. When she first saw me earlier, after I had removed my jacket, she said: “What a lovely sweater, shorin it tis.”

                                It Felt Like Love

I spent that night getting to know everyone, and in no time felt like one of the family.  At ten o’clock the guests started to leave and Marge took me into the kitchen.  “Can you stay a little while longer, because at eleven there is someone who I want you to meet?”  I said sure, as she fed me more cake and cookies telling me that they were baked special by the evening’s mystery guest.

At eleven fifteen the front door opened with an “I’m home,” coming from a young woman’s voice.  As I stood up, a flash of white turned the corner and entered the kitchen.  There in her finest nurse’s regalia, stood Eddie’s younger sister, Kathryn, who had just finished the evening shift at Nazareth Hospital in North Philadelphia.

“WOW, WAS SHE SOMETHING,” is all I could hear myself saying as she took her first look at me.  “So, this is the guy I’ve heard so much about huh,” she said as she walked to the refrigerator.  “Based on my brother’s description, I thought you would have been at least ten feet tall.”  Mildly sarcastic for sure, but I was smitten right away.

Later, I heard her on the phone with someone who sounded like her boyfriend.  They seemed to be fighting, and I sensed from the look on her dad’s face that they weren’t crazy about him either.  He said: “I hope it’s over,” and in less than a minute Kathryn came into the living room with tears in her eyes.  As she ran up the stairs to her bedroom, you could hear her say, “What A ****!” I prayed she wasn’t referring to me.  

Her mother ran up the stairs after her but before she did, she asked me not to leave.  Ten minutes later she came back downstairs and said: “You haven’t finished your cookies and cake in the kitchen.”

Marge was right, and I really wanted to finish them, but I was now starting to feel uncomfortable and in the middle of something that wasn’t for me to see or hear. Not wanting to seem rude, I followed her back to the kitchen table and sat down as she refilled my glass with milk. “So, what are your plans for the holidays,” she asked, as I wolfed down the sweets.

“Oh, nothing much,” I said, “just schoolwork and my job at the gas station.”  “And how about New Year’s Eve she asked?”  “Oh, nothing planned, probably just go see my grandparents and then watch the ball drop on TV in my apartment if I make it till twelve”.  “Why don’t you ask Kathryn out” she said, as her eyes twinkled? I thought I must have been hearing things and looked baffled, so she repeated it again…

                  Why Don’t You Ask Kathryn Out

This kindly woman, from this great family, was suggesting that I take their pride and joy daughter, Kathyrn, out for New Year’s Eve.  I didn’t know what to say. “Why don’t you think about it?  I’ll bet the two of you would have fun. I think based on tonight she is now free for New Year’s Eve too.”

I was literally in shock and not prepared for this.  I had recently broken up with a long-term girlfriend who I had dated all through high school and college.  I had convinced myself that I needed a break from girls for a while, and now here I was faced with dating Mr. Hudak’s only daughter.  In a few minutes, Marge walked out of the kitchen and Kathryn walked back in. She was now dressed in her pajamas and robe. If I had been smitten before, I was totally taken now.

I knew the first thing I said might be my last, so after a long pause I uttered: “So, I hear you’re not doing anything for New Years Eve?”  Not the best ice breaker as she yelled out to her mother: “Mommmmm, what did you tell him.”  Her mother didn’t answer.  I said again: “Kathy, please don’t take it the wrong way, I don’t have a date for New Year’s either.”  She looked at me for what seemed like an eternity, that in reality lasted for just a few seconds, before saying: “And just where do you propose we should go, Mr. Wonderful?”  Thank God I had an answer.

                           The Ice Had Broken

“Zaberers,” I said: “They’re open twenty-four hours. They have dinner and dancing and then a big show right after midnight.”  “Zaberers, huh,” she said, as she looked at me once more.  “All right, you can pick me up at eight.” With that, I didn’t want to push my luck.  I thanked her parents for the wonderful evening and wanted to say good night to Eddie, but he had already gone to bed.  That was what Marge was doing on her second trip upstairs — what a woman!!!

                          What A Woman Indeed!

Kathy and I had a great time on that first date on New Years Eve. All we really talked about was her father and about how hard he had struggled to keep the family together and how lucky he was to have found a woman like Marge who was the love of his life.

Kathy and I were engaged to be married just nine weeks later on March 5th,, and then married that fall on September 22nd 1974.  I was now a real part of the family that I had admired from afar.  Kathy and I had two children, and Marge and Ed were the best grandparents that two kids could ever have hoped for. They were lucky enough to see both of their grandchildren grow into adulthood and attend their college graduations. They were also able to proudly attend the wedding of their oldest grandchild, our daughter Melissa.

We lost Ed Hudak, my father-in-law, my guardian, and my friend, last December, and the world has been a little less bright with only the memory of him here now.  In many ways, he was the best of what we are all still trying to become, and his spirit remains inside us during the times of our greatest need.

For me though, I’ll never forget the time of our first meeting. That late September afternoon when I looked up those stairs at St Joe’s and not a word needed to be said. Here was a Saint of a man doing what real men do and doing it quietly. With humble dignity, his spirit reached out to me that day and filled an empty place inside of me with his love.

Now, forty years later, that same spirit occupies a bigger and bigger place in my life. From somewhere deep inside my soul it continues to live on, and I know for as long as I can remember — it will never let me go.

                           And I Called Him … ‘The Chief’
Kurt Philip Behm Nov 2018
As answers deceive
The questions stand
And dancers leave
To track the sand
Round robin conspiracy
Threatening us all
The letters all lower case
Their finality tall
Butting my head
Inside of the line
“When does it end Father,
Maybe this time”
The black and the white of it
The tall and the short
The poisons the same
One knife for a fork
New action will free
What inaction restrains
To once again, once again
Once again drain
So back to the future
Back to the past
Choose not your weapon
You’ve had your last laugh
The wind’s in the vestibule
New breath in the hymn
Your darkness reveals
What the light needs to win
With seven unsavory
And eight left to roast
The turkey unstuffed
Leaving room for the ghost
So ride away, ride away
Ride away all
The damage inflicted
This hammer a maul
The blood’s in the alleyway
Life beckons on
Death has been slaughtered
  —as begins the new song

(Rosemont Pennsylvania: August, 2014)
Kurt Philip Behm Mar 2021
The words came as gifts
from the land of proposal,
a voice of enchantment heard far, far, away
Wrapped in the promise
of a better tomorrow,
new bows made of letters untie and defray
Although undeserved but never unwanted,
in the vanishing darkness
feelings pledge with the dawn
As thoughts await marriage, the silence has ended,
a committed engagement
—betrothed in a song

(Rosemont Pennsylvania: March, 2021)
Kurt Philip Behm Feb 2021
Freeing the myth,
begotten to dream

Ramparts to crumble
—Sorcerer’s scheme

(Rosemont Pennsylvania: February, 2021)
Kurt Philip Behm May 2022
Robots reason
people think
in counterfactual oxymorons

The equal sign
ironic still
in anti-literal contradiction

A=B
B=C
but D won’t link without reflection

Zero-Sum
with nothing totaled
nondescript—the grand ligation

(Rosemont Pennsylvania: May, 2022)
Kurt Philip Behm Feb 2018
The answers deceive
The questions stand
The dancers leave
To track the sand
Round robin conspiracy
Threatens us all
The letters all lower case
The finality TALL
Butting my head
Inside of the line
Where does it end, Father
Maybe this time
The black and the white of it
The tall and the short
The poisons the same
One knife in the pork
New action may draw
What inaction restrains
What once again, once again
Once again drains
So back to the future
Back to the past
Choose not your weapon
You’ve had your last laugh
The wind’s in the vestibule
New breath in the hymn
Your darkness commands
What the light needs to win
The seven unsavory
The eight still to roast
The turkey unstuffed
Leaving room for the ghost
So ride away, ride away
Ride away all
The damage inflicted
This hammer a mall
The blood’s in the alleyway
Life beckons on
Death has been slaughtered
—as begins the new song

(Rosemont Pennsylvania: August, 2014)
Kurt Philip Behm Feb 2021
Is identity a reference
to all that I’m not
or something else again
Is what I’m becoming
and what I am
in contrast clearly plain
Or then is it more
and crossing over
to what I’ve not yet been
The border amorphous
where gravity pulls
—to dance beyond the rim

(Rosemont Pennsylvania: February, 2021)
Kurt Philip Behm Jun 2019
Beyond all critical thinking,
above what’s right or wrong

There’s a different understanding,
where words turn into song

With a deeper sense of freedom,
light shines upon itself

All reasoned dialectic,
left abandoned, lost—unfelt

(Rosemont Pennsylvania: June, 2019)
There was a loud KNOCK on the rectory’s back door.

Father Frank Kerin had been sitting at the rectory’s kitchen table reading the newspaper.  He was a young priest having just finished seminary only last June.  It was a late August Sunday afternoon, and he had just come back from visiting the sick at the local hospital. He was totally engrossed in the sports section of the paper when he heard it again.

This time the knocking was louder and more persistent. The housekeeper did not work Sundays, and Father Frank was alone in the big house.

He got up and walked through the kitchen to the enclosed back porch where the door was located.  Looking through the venetian blinds he could see that the person knocking was a woman.  As he opened the outer door, he could also see that she was quite large, appeared to be in her mid-sixties, and she was holding something rolled up in her right hand.  She had a menacing look on her face and Father Frank thought to himself … I hope she doesn’t hit me with that.

Father Frank opened the screen door and greeted the woman. She said: “My name is Florence Atterbury and I’m looking for Father Greenlee.”  Father Frank then introduced himself: “Hello Madam, my name is Father Frank Kerin and I’m new to the parish. I just graduated from Seminary in Cincinnati Ohio and have only been in Rosemont (Pa.) for a few short weeks. Father Greenlee is out for the day, is there anything I can help you with?”

The woman stood in the doorway for a long silent moment
looking down at the floor.  When she finally did look up at Father Frank, she said: “Father, I think I’d like to sit down.”  Father Frank escorted the woman back into the kitchen and sat her down at the table.  He then asked her if she would like something to drink.  Mrs. Atterbury said: “No thank you” and laid the newspaper she was carrying out on the kitchen table.

It was opened to section C, and the lead article was about the abuses of drinking and smoking in America.  The editor was linking both with many of the maladies that plagued our country and was trying to connect the effects of drinking and smoking to lives of total ruin and debauchery.  There were pictures in the article of men in Philadelphia’s bowery, and women in a local nightclub, with cigarettes between their fingers and a cocktail in their other hand.

The caption underneath said, ‘The Beginnings Of A Dead End Life.’

Mrs. Atterbury said she was livid and upset over the fundraiser that the church had just held in the school auditorium. Beer and wine had been served, and men — and some women —were seen smoking outside the front doors where the event was taking place.  She also said, that “anyone with half a brain knows that once you start smoking it leads to alcohol and then most likely to harder drugs and possibly even to a life of crime.  Your life is ultimately ruined and beyond saving and you are eventually condemned to a life outside the Church.”

The good woman went on for over ninety minutes lamenting the ramifications that a life involving tobacco and alcohol would entail.  She also said that she was “going to put her foot down with Father Greenlee about future events at the parish and that no alcohol should ever be served.”  When Father Frank explained to Mrs. Atterbury that there was wine at the Last Supper, and it was turned into the blood of Christ, she just said: “Father, really, that was just for God himself and the Apostles.  You don’t really think that applies to the rest of us, do you?”  Father Frank took one more shot at explaining to her the story of the Wedding Feast Of Cana, but again, it fell on deaf ears.

Mrs. Atterbury finally got up and as she left she pointed her big index finger right at the middle of Father Frank’s chest.

“Father, you mind my words, this smoking and drinking are going to undo all the good work my women’s auxiliary has done for the past twenty years. If it continues to go unchecked, it will spread through our elementary school and ruin every child in it.  It only takes one bad apple you know …”

As Mrs. Atterbury walked out the back door, Father Frank thanked her for coming.  He then walked slowly back into the kitchen and opened the refrigerator door.  After taking out a bottle of Budweiser he sat down, lit up a Chesterfield, and leaned back in his chair.  He just couldn’t help but wonder …
                              
                   What Was Hell Going To Be Like?
Kurt Philip Behm Feb 2021
Told over and over,
the lie became true

As memory inverted,
the falsehood imbued

My cornerstone crumbling,
sticks piled with straw

A last self-deception
—the fantasy law

(Rosemont Pennsylvania: February, 2021)
Kurt Philip Behm Jan 2020
Degrees of freedom...
a chance for control

The will to measure
—what choices extoll

(Rosemont Pennsylvania: January, 2020)
Kurt Philip Behm Jul 2021
Reigning in his own demise,
the alcoholic stumbles

Falling from the ramparts high,
hard upon the ground

A monarchy of lost regret,
in anger’s shame he crumbles

Trapped inside a broken dream
—heartache’s thorny crown

(Rosemont College: July, 2021)
Kurt Philip Behm Apr 2021
Can you have a mind
and not have a soul
Connection temporal,
divorced from the whole

Can consciousness live
for only itself
A hand with three aces
—His card left undealt

(Rosemont Pennsylvania: April, 2021)
A teardrop of joy
a teardrop of sorrow
Different in substance
different in kind
Flowing endemic
the scientist’s baffled
Their chemical compounds
— distinct and profound

(Rosemont College: June, 2024)
Kurt Philip Behm Mar 2023
(if it’s)

Love me …
hate my writing

(or)

Hate me …
love my writing

I can live with the hate

(Rosemont College: March, 2023)
Complex thoughts
need simple words
The meaning foremost
verse to show

The mind expands
new seeds put down
Cross pollinated
left to grow

The soil fertile
just sun and rain
As fields once fallow
rise anew

The world awaits
each problem solved
In cyphers brief
— with letters few

(Rosemont College: January, 2024)
Joel L Langham Dec 2020
Strolling my way up Rosemont street
With no fears and no cares
All the streets look the same
No one even knows my name
You can’t get there from here
There’s no chance to keep clear
Each house repeats a mold
Like some complicated code
Or a movie with you
I walk alone so far from my home
I miss your hand in mine
I’m  astonished and surprised
Can’t you see it in my eyes
When I look at you
This day goes on forever
In the city
City maze
Kurt Philip Behm Jul 2021
Spiritual draftsmen,
builders of walls
Demanding blind homage,
tithes of false hope

Fortressing darkness,
ministering fear
Evangelist’s rumbling
—prophets who quake

(Rosemont College: July, 2021)
Kurt Philip Behm Jan 2020
Particles in the void,
memories in the stream

Lovers in the mist
—time caught between

(Rosemont Pennsylvania: January, 2020)

— The End —