"logbrain" poems
Thee Artiste Carvó's "Fumility"
I am a tróubled Tróll, yes I be
draped in bonds of turgid fumility
endowed with a mind's inanity!
Indeed, I fantasize the glóry of Thee
floating like a cork in lunacy
at the edges of the dredges of futility!
But then, as I hallucinate visions of greatness in I and me,
the Vóices come, singing fóllies of my destiny
buzzing in my head like a bumblebee!
The mystic maggóts envelop the I, the fartistic see
birdies tweet to coo coos in the jujube tree
while the lónely Lóg swims in I and Thee,
counting buttons, deviant in insanity!
Some souls are just simply shallower than others. There is no shame in recognizing I's ówn drabness, and appreciating the bóredóm Thee'self has unleashed upon the world. When Thee writes crap about the greatness of I, Thee is displaying I's disappointment for I's lack of gifts...
Would you yourself not feel pity for the finest fartist alive?
*Original ('Humility') by: Thee Artiste aka Logbrain Crappó
Reworked by: CrE aka Trollminator*
Jan 10, 2015
Jan 10, 2015 at 12:09 PM UTC
Thee Artiste Carvó's "I Went Berserk Today"
I went berserk today...
They locked the cell again...
And I started to pray...
That they didn't forget my meds...
And pray...
Because my cell was filled with horrors...
And a fine **** came...
It passed through the hole in my soul...
And the fine **** was my art...
That I had made...
It smelled...
Oh oh...
Oh so good...
A truly fine ****
My meds now no longer needed...
The visions reappear...
Tomahawks...
Fly in flock...
And are dropped by the smell of ****
A fine, fine **** from Thee Fartest
Dust storms...
Stay in a rut...
Between the frail cheeks of my divine ****
And are expelled with my next fartistic emission...
I...
I stay stay on top!
Floating upon the winds of ****
*Original ('I Went Home Today...') by: Thee Artiste aka Logbrain Crappó
Reworked by: CrE aka Trollminator*
Jan 4, 2015
Jan 4, 2015 at 11:51 AM UTC
Thee Artiste Carvó's "Embrace Thee Blight!"
Thee Artiste's **** once more is freed!
Oh! Wandering fumes do flatulence heed!
Bubble forth! Through waters so impure!
Thee's ***** **** is near!
Bowwow to Thee…
for Thee's smell's a doggy's dream...
Embrace Thee blight!
Gasses new, gasses old…
pass through Thee's dual manifold…
Thee's thee fartiste of forever…
Cro-Magnon man who's mentally spent,
******* on creativity's flames
Oh perfect ****
exudes from Thee who seeps…
for he is Thee who sets the winds of fartistry free.
Only Thee (the no one) knows!
How true fartistry blows...
like Thee who is the evoker...
of the fartistic flow...
Oh Thee who is Logbrain Crappó is master of the fartiste's blows!
*Original ('Embrace The Light') by: Thee Artist aka Logbrain Crappó
Reworked by: CrE aka Trollminator*
Jan 23, 2015
Jan 23, 2015 at 12:15 PM UTC
The Artiste Carvó's "The Greatest Fartist Alive"
(Another Crummy Acrostic)
T is for **** I am attended by flies...
H is for Haughtiness, I am flowing through the fartist's stanks...
E is for Enema, my fine **** pollutes the very hole...
G is for Gigantic, I am the biggest ego in history...
R is for Refluxing, my fine putriditry puts artistry in ******
E is for Emetic, I truly am expelling...
A is for ******* I posses the gift of ****
T is for ****** I leave no stomach un-turned...
E is for Excrutiating, my words torture the very soul...
S is for ****** My logic is slimy....
T is for Tag-along, I truly am shadowed by all and everyone...
F is for Fatuous and Flatulence, the essence of I…
A is for Archfiend, demon am I...
R is for Revulsion, My art is abomination - My art yet *****
T is for Tedious, I have been placed here to bore people to death...
I is for Idiot, I am truly unblessed...
S is for Selfish, I place **** before I's self...
T is for Talenticide, I have killed all things of art...
A is for Asinine, I possess all lacks...
L is for Lifeless, I truly worm the artistic heart...
I is for Idolize, I worship I...
V is for Venomous, I am all that is spite and impure...
E is for Emasculated, I am indubitably impotent...
This sums up why I and I alone am the greatest fartist alive,
And I will of course do one of my great farts in time.
*Original ('The Greatest Artiste Alive') by: Thee Artist aka Logbrain Crappó
Reworked by: CrE aka Trollminator*
Jan 8, 2015
Jan 8, 2015 at 2:11 AM UTC
Thee Artiste Carvó's "Maggot O' Pus"
I open my fly
I beat
I close my eyes
And seep
Watch me now
To see the art
Thee art of a master-bater
I read your eyes
they show horror
They reflect Thee MasterPiece-of-Shit
Thee art of a master-bater
Thee art of Loghain Carvó
I open my lips and ****
For all these works are Thee Maggot O' Pus
*Original ('Magnum Opus') by: Thee Artist aka Logbrain Crappó
Reworked by: CrE aka Trollminator*
Dec 30, 2014
Dec 30, 2014 at 8:24 AM UTC
Me: Logbrain why do you continually abuse the work of other members
Logbrain: Simply because I am a superior being in the world of art
Me: I would suggest inferior would perhaps be a better word to describe you
Logbrain: Oh Oh Oh
Me: Surely that should read ** ** ** because most people laugh at your pathetic poetry.... No, pathetic attempts at poetry
Logbrain: PATHETIC!!! I, but but but Oh
Me: There we go again Logbrain, Oh. Is that your favourite word?
Logbrain: It's the only one I can spell and anyway I can put more artistic expression into Oh than most people can write in 40 lines
Me: Oh Oh Oh how sad ** ** **
and thus the conversation went on
Jun 17, 2014
Jun 17, 2014 at 5:53 AM UTC
Thee Artiste Carvó's "The Odor of Logbrain Crappó"
Lógbrain yóur **** is oh so ASSinine...
It is of course malign...
Yóu are the cón artist of the moronic chimERA...
Yóu are of course a resigned, all inferiór, cón artist that becraps the mind, body and soul, as well as the very nether realms...
óh óh óh.... Lógbrain yóu are lonely while taking care of yóur flock in the fields... óh óh óh...
Yóu ascend the flock...
ascending and mounting the sheep, one by one
Yóu are on top...
on top from behind... yes, óh Yes, Óh YEs, ÓH YES, YES, YESSS...
Óh soiinf osiujh8adabyghueyhiu rnolkm
Touching the heart...
Touching the soul...
Touching the woolly pudenda…
and thus issueth the "I"s, the "óh"s and the ewes from the egómaniacal shepherd ,
Crappó, the manna of the banana I-gód <> the delusion of illusions and confusions of a sick putrid sub-mind...
**** that only yóu and the sheep yóu have so deeply touched can feel it in the end... óh óh óh
Óh Lógbrain Crappó, óh please óh please óh please crap some more fine **** for yóur lessers, if any there be...
with yet another one of yóur masterPIECES in the fields of ewe.
Yes, Crappó, BÓTTÓM feeder, yóu and yóur fine **** are a pain in the *** to all...
This fine piece goes out to the greatest cón artist alive.
*Original ('An Ode To Loghain Carvó') by: Thee Artist aka Logbrain Crappó
Reworked by: CrE aka Trollminator*
Jan 27, 2015
Jan 27, 2015 at 4:03 AM UTC
Thee Artiste Carvó's "Fartistic Wind"
A ****** seeps into Thee's loft and lispers...
"F-f-f-fartistic s-s-s-soul, I would like to be a fr-fr-fr-freak and ooze in your **** cre-cre-cre-cretinivity"...
Thee fartistic soul then cuts cheese, and says...
"If you are to reach true degeneration, you must first crap a work of ****
The ****** then begins to swirl round and round the **** bowl...
A can of trash then pervades the room and spills these words...
"Without a lisper there is no ****** without a ****** a lisper ceases to be"...
The ****** then collides with the can of trash...
A masterpiece of p-p-p-puke...
*Original ('Artistic Wind') by: Thee Artiste aka Logbrain Crappó
Reworked by: CrE aka Trollminator*
Jan 18, 2015
Jan 18, 2015 at 12:40 PM UTC
Thee Artiste Carvó's "LogbraIn Crappó"
(Another Crummy Acrostic)
LudIcróus
ómnI-Ignórant
grótesqueness
ball-less
róckbóttóm
addled
IdIótIc
nóbódy
CólItIc
repulsIve
asshóle
pIsspót
puerIle
óh-ffensIve
*Original ('Loghain Carvó') by: Thee Artist aka Logbrain Crappó
Reworked by: CrE aka Trollminator*
Jan 8, 2015
Jan 8, 2015 at 1:40 AM UTC
Oh wonderous poet (oops got that bit wrong)
Thou doest fine deeds on this great site
Give us belly laughs into the night
and yes even unto dawn
And as ink from your artless pen doth flow
our admiration ever grows
for the great man that is you
Humility is in your soul
fine penned words you have for all
who could never aspire to be
as great as you
Shakespeare would never have a chance
against your worthless art
for surely he would be the lesser man
So oh oh oh great Logbrain pen the words
that fill our mundane lives with so much mirth
Dogbrain write for us
Jun 23, 2014
Jun 23, 2014 at 3:44 AM UTC
How To Know How to Crów
I only know…
how to crów…
and for that matter how snot to blów...
to flush Thee's I lids, filled with sóót…
and trample others underfoot…
and swizzle Lóg's inadequate mediocrity in beer…
and discontent so insincere…
to bake a subpar leaking **** insult…
of the egómania egó cult…
as self-serving accolade…
and act the quade, though never laid…
and dig a swirling dreck cascade…
as Carvó's paintings quickly die and fade…
within Thee's stinking I parade…
for three art and two art and one art for zero art...
We (I and Thee) can only obsess to tear HP apart.
*Original ('How To Know Not To Know') by: Thee Artiste aka Logbrain Crappó
Reworked by: CrE aka Trollminator*
Feb 2, 2015
Feb 2, 2015 at 9:02 AM UTC
Thee Artiste Carvó's 'Poetry Vile And Poetry Juvenile'
Óh in the darkness of common decline, the wee Creature, Lóg, was a pitiable *** whose delusions and confusions caused the evolution of thought to come to a stop, sunk in the bowels of Thee's self-serving slóp.
In the circus ring of artistry's self-deluded elves...
where dwarfs dance in dungeons built of flatulence…
and the fumes of envied condescendence seep through Thee's hallowed walls,
poetry, vile, rots in Thee's hands with fingers bent and straight...
with contradictory thoughts that lead to naught...
Thee has dared to óffend
(giving true artistry a chuckle, a chortle and convulsed laughter from the rafters...)
out of baneful ignorance and envy lodged in the pale emptiness of I!
Óh on the horizon appears a finger so magnificent!
Standing proud between ring and index digits, bent and kneeling,
standing hard, mócking dear artistry.
Móldy and so piss-ticated, Thee is the wee óne that tirelessly creates and creates doubt.
And Thee dwarfs and Thee elves still dance to the meaningless ring of blinded I's.
Óh in spite of Lóg's vile works, humanity will evolve beyond the "óuch" of puerile jealousy and give birth to a better Earth.
While fuming, not firing neurons which have ceased fighting...
Thee flays the soul, and that is sooo not cool...
Behold! Thee wee óne ***** a prune that 'luminates the dune of dimness
and with Lóg's **** comes great feelings of Thee,
and something gory will Thee extract from the great **** of I!
Reward for freeing us from the I and the Thee is that Lógbrain will no longer burden all of humanity...
Thee ****** maggót Carvó will vanish in the doom of dreariness
where prunes no longer shrink…
In fading, Thee looks into the eyes of us, and we feel nauseous...
but we need not fight, for his lessons are naught,
and we all can stop sighing
'my oh my, Thee smell repels'
and leave behind Thee shriveled **** of vacuity
and continue to do artistry.
*Original ('Poetry Villains And Poetry Heroes') by: Thee Artiste aka Logbrain Crappó
Reworked by: CrE aka Trollminator*
Jan 12, 2015
Jan 12, 2015 at 11:25 AM UTC