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she replaces her tears with laughs
awakens at night to avoid nightmares and the judgeful eyes of loved ones
she drinks away her confusions
smokes her way out of frustrations
injects affection into her heart of lust
feeds her mind with vindictive thoughts

she watched his love turn to doubt through her bloodshot eyes
and so,
she laughed to replace her eyes that didn't work
she laughed so hard until her stomach hurt
Evelyn Genao Feb 2018
The girl who always laughed, cried.
The girl who seemed unbreakable, broke.
She dropped the fake smile as a tear rolled down her cheek and whispered to herself,
“I can't do this anymore.”

Darkness enveloped around her as her unbreakable heart started to crack.
She's hurt.
But every day, she walks with a smile,
‘Cause that's just who she is:
The girl who never stopped smiling.

They can't see that she's hurting.
They don't notice her pain.
The girl who feels like she is drowning in the rain,
while everyone else is sitting in the sunlight.
The girl with the eyes full of innocence; the face of an angel.
Her personality is that of a dreamer and a smile that hides more pain than they can imagine.

She was just a girl.
Who experienced heartbreaking pain.
Who was taught never to show her true feeling as nobody would care.
She knew to hold back those tears until she was alone.
She grows cold with every stabbing knife in her back.

Warm red liquid, flowing down her arm, is all the comfort she needs.
Silver metal, shining so bright, is her only true friend.
Her scars, hidden from the world’s judgeful eyes,
hold memories of hurtful words and repressed memories.

The unbreakable girl finally broke.
Tell me what you think!!! I hope you like it!!!! I figured out how to italicize and bold words thanks to @Ash Angel
the judgeful puritan
is contradiction
and yet to be a puritan
is to judge

their glass house falls
when their mirrors turn translucent

— The End —