I’m calling it quits
I need a break from all the stressful smoke breaks
Nights spent breathing in air as heavy as Earth
with a heavy chest with the same thought looping
“why is most love unrequited?”

I’m done tying myself to people
who push me around to see the pain in my eyes
But I still feel safe with them
and then all the bad thoughts become a blanket
So depression makes the softest bed
It’s easy to wake up and find myself paralyzed

I’m cleaning out the skeletons
They over flow my closet and their ghosts follow me
Everywhere I go I carry demons
If I speak my truth with an open heart,
Maybe I’ll find angels to replace the evil.

I’m going to let go
And forgive myself
And everyone who doesn’t deserve it.

I am starting with cleaning the ashes of those I’ve burned.

I told her she’s just another body
she came too soon and I licked my lips
now she keeps hitting my line,
she’s addicted again.

I think it’s happened again
you see, there’s a guy
Who has feelings i’d normally condemn.
whenever I see him he’s always broken and high

He’s a guy who refuses to rise above  
But he’s manipulated me into believing he’s found his twin flame
And he pulls the trigger with precise aim,
but he’s already in love.

I have a war inside my head
And sometimes I lie in bed
And pretend to be dead

Sometimes I lay awake,
wishing the earth would quake
And then my belly aches

But I am not hungry
It’s just emotional sundry
my mind becomes so ugly.

so, hear it from me, I’m starving.
Hoping to feeling something.
On these nights my mind is startling.
Until the war is almost calming.

The blood shed keeps the vampires fed
And I’m sorry for this war inside my head
I’ve always appreciated the people who never fled
because I know they all dread this war inside my head

my name is depression,
Because these lows seem to define
my entire mental illness.
my name is depression when I’m lost,
Blacking out from the heavy weight of my mind
My name is depression
When my manager notices I’m not motivated,
And suddenly my career is on the line.
my name is depression
when I’m in the middle of an episode
And can’t be bothered to do classwork
And suddenly I’m threatened with being kicked out of college.
And I’m defined by all of this, purposeless.
My goal is rise above the chemicals in my brain,
Without therapy or medicine.
Because I’ve always taken pride in being independent.
But it’s time for me to ask for help.

I have the soul of a fire
I have hands as cold as Antarctica’s air
I have my feet grounded
I have the wrath of the ocean

I am unstoppable

I have the wrath of the ocean,