"You're tired, aren't you?"*

Not in the way that you think.

It's only getting worse and worse
this longing I have for you
that pulls at my heart
and stretches it wide and across
far enough that my heart
oh my stupid heart
it's on the floor now and being dragged across the floor
and straight into your open palms.

The sky was gray,
the kind of overcast that took over
not only the sky
but took your mind with it,
Pouring all of its tears
steadily
into all your thoughts,
Drenching them and washing them all away.
The steady pitter patter of the rain
drummed away all the swirling mania that danced across my head,
the soft jazz settling into my head
steadying me
and finally bringing me to rest.

Things have gotten better
all the shadows disappeared,
despite all the light.

Maybe im just staring too hard into the light,
but i cant see the demons that often anymore
unless I seek them out.

Things are changing

The thing is
its not that you left
I dont mind that you've gone to go find yourself
to explore things you've never seen
to escape this hellhole

Its that you didn't take me with you

It was dark
and I wasnt alone.
I could hear your gentle breath,
In and out of your mouth,
those soft lips perfectly puckered
and your breath finally steady.

You were asleep.

You were finally seemingly at peace,
your mind wasnt running around
worrying about how to pay the bills
worrying about me,
you were finally sleeping and dreaming
and in bliss.