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Molly Jan 2022
We are gathered here today for  the part of me who repeats over and over “not good enough”
Today is the day I burn the part that thinks it’s only worth doing if it’s perfect
It’s only worth saying if it gets praise it’s only worth living if it’s achieving
Today is the day this version of me dies

And isn’t it beautiful
Isn’t it heartbreaking
The seeds I grew inside myself, some of them rotten
What a gift
what a tragedy

Today is the funeral.
Today I rise.
Molly Jan 2022
Dear 2022,

I have arrived
bare and alive
flawed and unruly

wrapped in lavender
Last year I held joy in my palms
washed my face in it
Last year I showered in eucalyptus
I let my hair grow past my hips
Painted my toes with honey to show the bees they’re welcome here

Last year I began by asking for kindness and comfort and love and I learned I didn’t need to ask the sky

I can create all these things for myself
I can plant them and nurture them
I can nurture me and love me and pour sunshine over me

So 2022
Here I am
Stepping into you
Ready to be planted
I am here with open arms
Asking for nothing
Except for one more trip around the sun
Molly Jan 2022
(To your inner child)

Tell her she needn’t weather the storm on her own this time

Wrap her in lavender and sing to her and dress her in courage. Tell her she is as powerful as her wildest dreams.

Let her rest in your arms,
Watch the sunrise together.
Accompany her grief, comb the knots out of her hair
Let her run barefoot in the dirt with no consequence

Write her love letters, mail the ones she wrote for those who were incapable of receiving
Burn the ones where she blamed herself.

“Too much too wild too selfish too human too challenging too loud too loving too anguished”

Burn it all, let her hold the match so she understands she is the master of her fate.

Hold her tiny hand in yours until she dissipates
Absorbed into the roots of your inner garden;

She is owed a place there, but she will no longer overshadow the other wildflowers.
Molly Jan 2022
I always wanted to walk through fire
But now that I’m here
Surrounded in flames

Soul burning

I don’t want to walk
I want to dance
Molly Dec 2021
I haven’t
Traced your ear enough with my fingertips to have it memorized
Can’t quite remember the imprints of your hands
How your skin feels on my skin
What your breath sounds like when you soften

But you’re beginning to feel familiar  

And I know one day I will know you and all this
Like the sun knows the sky
Molly Nov 2021
I want to come home and the lights are on because you’re curled up in the living room and filling the air with your laughter

I want it to be warm when I step in the door because you cranked up the heat after your afternoon walk in the snow.

I want to step over your shoes you forgot to put away

Toss away your sweater you left beside you on the couch

And lift your arms over my shoulders and nestle into your neck.

I want to come back to a home
Not a house.

I want to come back to light and not darkness

Want to come back to hear your voice not my own breath.

But I don’t know who you are yet
Or where you are yet
Until then I’ll leave the lights on
And I hope you come home soon.
Molly Nov 2021
Like a forest that sets itself on fire to start over

I will uproot the parts of myself that no longer serve me so I
can emerge wiser brighter lighter

and I will be a better home for myself and the garden that I have been tending to
That is gently blooming inside of me
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