It was easier doing it
Than
Getting it undone"!

I'm hungry
But can't eat
I'm tired
But can't sleep
My thoughts are busy
But my mind is empty?
My mind is busy
But my thoughts are empty?
I am sad
But there's no tears..
How can you be there
While I'm over here!
How can you sleep
While I'm crying over here!
How can you smile
When I just wana drown?
How can you not see
Its for you that I feel!
But how can I feel
When the heart bleeds?
It was all a big mistake
Death was here to take!

Went through all my write
From the last few years
And it was clear

History repeats itself

Its a vicious cycle
On repeat

Once again
I'm lying here
Heart filled with tears

And I still don't know the core

Trying to figure out my ways
And why I cannot change

I'd rather be alone
Than take a chance to love
Coz I know how much it hurts

Uncertainty is killing me
I can no longer see me future

I don't know what is wrong with me

Dying to fall inlove
And just be truly happy with what I've got!

But the grass is always greener on the other side

One never seems to be enough!

Feel like moving to another town
Running away is what I usually do
The easy way out

I'm a coward you see

I cannot face my fears
Don't wanna dig for core problems either

I'm scared of what I might find in my past

The beauty does n0T lie with me ~ it lies with you..
I started liking you more than I was suppose to..
I'm the ugly one ~ my ugly comes from Within!
This is how to **** up a g00d thing!
Pr0bally the best thing that has ever happened to me..!!
You made me feel again..!! Which I now Regret!
Coz once again ~ all I feel now is pain and Hurt!
My sincerist apologies - won't even set anything right..?!
The ugliest I said about you ~ and I don't expect you to forgive me!
But please ~ I want you take it up light heartedly!
I was the fool..!!
Since then ~ I fell inlove with you..!!

I use to be the one
To brighten everyone's day
Put a smile on their pretty little face

Wipe the tears
Replace the fears

Be their voice
Their standing rock

Make them sing
Bring happiness

Let them believe
There's beauty in everything

How did I become this weak??

And just like that
I'm wide awake
Tomorrows troubles crawling back

Feel like a failure
But worst of all
I've failed my son!

And just like that
I'm wide awake
Tomorrows troubles crawling back

Have to stand my ground
Not let go - just hang on
Do not let the last little piece of Me
Go out of control!

And just like that
I'm wide awake
Tomorrows troubles crawling back

Failure or Not
I have to stay strong
My son depends on me
His unconditional love
Will pull me through!

As a Human
I have done Many things I Feel *Guilt* for!
I Feel Pain from so Many things!
(the damnest of things..)

Memories of True Happiness! Memories which *Makes Life Worth Living..*

BUT,

We Are Só often Lost...
Because of Bad Ones..

* We are Nothing More than the Memories we keep...

I have now felt
What you felt
What you felt so deeply in me..

And I apologize..
I am so sorry for not feeling what you did..

I have now felt the beauty, fearless, shameless, blameless, unconditional Godly Love
You felt all along

And I truly hope & pray you will find that beauty again some time soon..

You deserve it too

From my flesh
Through my core
Straight into my

  ~Soul

Every firbre of my being
& my entire soul
Loves you completely

The vastness of my love
Runs so deeply
Passing all my fears
Into tears
Knowing what you deserve
Is so much more!!

May the one you marry one day
Give you My Love
And that little bit more..