A regret is like a bomb
In your intestines:
I don't have one
I don't want one
I'm not going to be an idiot
And put one inside myself
Nor will I let other people
Put one in me
I will die
Before I allow myself to become
The object of suicide bombings
Because that's what regrets do
They don't just **** you
From the inside out
They take collateral damage
And **** your friends and the
People around you
Regrets are one of the worst
Afflictions to have

You love me?
Well that makes one of us

nemo scit quare
ego ridens sunt
nemo scit
et nescio

Petty problems intoxicate
Liberate inebriate
All I have are petty problems
And the petty people
Who began them

But let's not point the finger
Let's not draw comparisons
Let's not do these things
That make me realize
How senseless
These issues are

Because without the issues
Without the conflict
Where can the ****** be?
The exposition
That shows nothing
What point does it all have?

Give me a reason
A flow to my story
Even if it is petty
Just let me have it
The reason moves me
More than the pettiness
Disappoints me

She's wearing these long, bright red rainboots
On the sunniest of days
As if she's afraid that if she doesn't
She'll fade away and disappear forever
"You won't!" I want to shout to her
"You'll never fade away
Because you are the most beautiful thing
That has ever been permitted to stay in this world
To pass before my eyes
To smile... perhaps in my general direction..."
But she doesn't hear me
She is lost in her own analysis
Of the shifting clouds
The little whisps of whimsical water vapors
I see her spin slightly
Gazing up at their shapeless shapes
Her lips mouthing words that I cannot hear
For I am a coward and do not approach
O, What I would give to speak with her
For even the most slight of seconds
About even the most trivial thing in the universe
But alas, it was not meant to be
I walk slowly down the street
Past the cacophonous roaring of
The motor cars
As unflattering as they are to the ear
So she is beautiful
I arrive at the corner
The smell of tar and gasoline rise
From the steaming asphalt
I turn
And she is there
She is there and she is sitting
She is sitting on her bike right there
She is on her bike and I see her as I turn
"Hello" she says
She smiles as she says hello
I search for the words
To tell her how
She has owned my heart
Since the moment I laid eyes on her
"Ayeii" I say as the light changes
She giggles and rides away
"Hello I love you"
But it's too late
She can't hear me
I walk across the intersection
And continue my long walk back home
Filled with the hope that maybe it will happen again
Maybe I'll see her again
Maybe...

I'm going to stop pretending
That we had something in common
Other than music
And the pool
And our mutual gay friend
Who may one day be
The ruler of the carne asadas
You were my escape once
But no more
I used you, and I admit that
I'm so sorry I did
But I never lied to you
I wanted you near me
I still do
That's what's going to make this
So much more difficult on us
I just want to backtrack
To you and I
Being bus buddies
And hanging out
Before we had the added stress
Of dating
And kissing
Or in my case, attempting to kiss
And failing miserably
And hoping your parents would
Open the door to interrupt us
I want the us before all that
The us before the us
When it was just you and I
Separate but together
Instead of
Together but separate

Tears like these
Need patches
Not flimsy
Stitching