One room away is a woman
who wants me to **** her.
She is beautiful, intelligent, and drunk.

I am ugly, intelligent, and sober.

Even though my highest and best
tells me to walk away with a smile,
my core screams for a ruining.

One room away is a drunk, *****,
dripping work of art who is also
very, very lucky.

Charles tells me to listen to
my **** and Pablo whispers a reminder
to remember the smell
of early morning wheat
and your eyelashes
while Walt and I gaze at the stars
and think of death.

I smile to myself,
soaking in the after glow
of vanilla chai, good ****,
and dead poets.

One room away is a woman
who's fate was in my sadistic hands.
Two rooms away is a twelve year old
who is dreaming of flag football
and Vans and getting to
level 37 of Skyrim
and one day,
after he wakes up
and after we have our
toaster strudel,
and somewhere in between
me stopping for coffee
and dropping him off,
I'll remind him
that good ***** is everywhere
so take your time and do it right
and when you just don't want to
look at their face,
make some tea,
catch a buzz,
and read some poetry.

1.
Firsts can never change,
But they can most certainly
Oh, be forgotten.

2.
Do not say my name.
Say my name again—say hers.
This time: I dare you.

3.
When I stripped you of
Your faith, I had asked you if
God was still watching.

4.
Perhaps flirtation—
Music taste, or lucky liquor.
Perhaps loneliness.

5.
Never spoke a word,
Until substance set us free
Upon each other.

6.
We were nothing more
Than slutty dancing, slurred words,
And a messy bed.

7.
Sleep—an illusion.
I start to wonder if you,
Love, were one as well.

8.
I was more to you
In one night—than you were to
Me in seven years

9.
Little golden boy:
How can you hate the whole world
Yet say you love me?

10.
I was sick, alone.
You were not special—just there.
Still sick. Still alone.

11.
I stole from God again.
You were young, and I— Oh, I
Just want to stargaze

12.
Smoke green under green—
sweat under sheets—broken bones—
Blood on hardwood floors.

13.
Hands can hold tightly.
Skin can connect easily.
Words can lie sweetly.

14.
You have green eyes, and—
soft hands, and— loving skin, and—
Nothing I deserve

15.
Let's talk about ***.
Let's talk about love. Let's talk
*About the sadness