3rd and final day of my sister's garage sale
she asked me to sit and watch it while her and my nephew go to church.
"Any price you think is good for anything will be fine"
I sit and watch people sort through stuff and I want to apologize.
For some reason it's a very odd sort of feeling,
inviting strangers to rifle through your belongings.
Either nothing you've kept hidden is worthy of keep
or they'll make you an offer and show you it's cheap.

I would hate to have those onlookers dumpster-diving for deals within me
[I don't believe that I'd measure up either]
Everything I got I'll just keep

An ugly unwashed stranger's hand holds up my soul, turning it round he sneers his nose
"How much you need for this old thing?"
"I stickered it 10 dollars and it's practically new"
"I'll give you a quarter. It looks broken, it's held together with glue"
"Fine, fine. Whatever is fine."

After two days of this I'd go to church too...
to think I may have some things that I still keep hidden
and there's a god up there some place in the sky
who loves me and may still want to buy

study, cram, call, make plans...
power point, presentation, speech, rewrite...
theory, materialism and idealism and the difference,
Marx, Freud to psychoanalyze...
on to polynomials, linear equations, I make a scientific notation...
take a break. (eat)
ham sweet and thick
with lots of pineapple and some cherries
potato bread and cheese
PowerAde to rehydrate
little vodca with o.j. and cigarette  
after lunch, breathe .
and it’s back to study lab to mentally beat meat.
paper due, final today, did I remember to triple check
and get rid of paper clips, include a cover sheet...
ready to evaluate... I think.
ready to second guess, miss dates and time, "you're late"
again...
95, 98, 3.5 GPA? pre-test, for final, make sure your research is done,
site, source, quote, student rate and double space
power nap, smoke again,
is the day over yet?..

Dawn of a new day
watch it rise
last smoke 'till who knows when
turn the heater down and become one with the cold
no more hiding out
new season of life
new days and nights to come
make a decision to crawl out of that shell at last
music is playing
all the movies I've seen
now is the time and here is the moment when
I start again
purposefully

I'm awe struck
got a message from you on Facebook,
I just can't stop smiling.
You flipped my day around,
bright side up from upside down.
You sent a song you played my way,
and breathed new life into me
One moment I was drowning
and then your melody revived me.
You wrote that you missed seeing me around,
but my heart I still keep hidden
buried underground.

i like my glasses.
they're not ones that help me see any better,
but they do help me better not to see. your eyes to mine ,
i can remain around and talk for a time
... with my glasses.

i like my hat,
or hats rather, i have several.
they separate me in my mind from someone else i may be,
but the someone without my hat is the someone you would not meet.
the me without my hat stays locked in a room for days.
he doesn’t come out and you would never want him to anyways.
he's not a charming fellow, the me without a hat,
we're all probably better off if he keeps some thoughts under wraps.

i like books,
and always keep one or two with me.
stories well written, and some not so much.
poetry, and short speeches,
of spirituality, religion, and lust.
i read them all in front of the cafe, or on the bus.

i have no antidote here to offer you,
for the problems that we both seem to hush.
it is what it is,
meaning is found in things that it must.