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dania May 2016
your hands are over my face
you say
        your baby face is your saving grace.
and yours can shine. here you are. my favorite star.
asking me can you see, baby, and if you do, near or far.
near or far? doesn't matter. where i am and where you are- whether here, whether far.
whether it be whether it was
or if it will ever be again
when? i don't know whether to say now or then. now or then?
here all the spoil of the nighttime dim comes true
and all the ruin of the daylight is a form of truth too
when i plan on short notice to look at you
here you wonder strongly about the night
here you feel a bit about the day
you turn to ask me to put the lights out and tell you i'm okay
but if that was our issue, would it ever sit long enough in chairs to stain
cause here i ask heaven explain
heaven please explain
that hurt is a face that hurt is a name
and whether it was or whether it be in this case love
your hands are over my baby face
and i really cannot see
dania May 2016
here.
yes, show me here
I'll show you.
show me the crash coming now
coming fast now
God, it's coming faster now
would you look at that
would I?
can it be
it already was.
then why do you need it shown now?
why wouldn't I need it shown now? I crashed from the front
and I never saw it from the back.
I crashed in the back and never looked front.
I crashed in the side and kept it all in.
where did it begin?
you can't see? honestly?
honestly.*
in in in in in
dania May 2016
gripping times they were;
when they held me in the palm of the hour
i felt time wave me over
as i planned to pass it by.

we surfed here
      surfed to
and from
and away
like our seconds were endless
and certainly independent of day

to please myself i try to remember time in my palm than me in its.
cause its clutch sure killed me first in my wits
but i always feel that fake shell i have around this
construct crack little by little
when the staleness of my illusion starts to go brittle.

as i sleep soft nights away and outlive the hard days
dwelling on a stack of banal chores
too convinced as it is that humans are a face and life its pores

too desperate to be filled? wishing to be killed? (made for it, too.)
to cut off time, which so readily breaks.
to give more of it up, which the universe so readily takes.
till we cut it off till we reach the end of more
till we finally stop waking up from this forever chore

when we let these days go we do pretending they're wholly ours
and when we let seconds go we do pretending they're holy hours;
you give me a minute back of my time... sometimes sixty, too.
with every two seasons you say spring forward
with every two seasons you say fall backwards

is it what i know to be partial devour
when zones don't change the seconds but they change the hour

    then we stand ourselves only as we fill ourselves to the brink, till false fulfillment come
in the color of root in the color of frond
in the color of favored relationship and forced-on bond
when the grey colored it all a different picture
when we combined optimism with realism in strange hazy mixture
when we drunk till numbness permeated bone
when we drunk till white noise recaptured all pitch and tone
till the fastest hour passed till the
slowest hour swallowed
and till we fell deep into this
aging hollow
critiquing aging and time
dania Apr 2016
She said: I need you to hold still
or else how can I write about you
dania Apr 2016
lean forward
time to learn
here is your story
here is my hand
here is our journey
faraway band
faraway land
telling a story
music playing backwards now

and he looks at me to tell me
you will know the taste of stubbornness
too much like a shape you used to trace in the sand
too much like a shape
you used to trace in the sand
dania Apr 2016
trying to remember what cupid used to tell me
after i told him if he ever came was there a chance that he would stay
cause i got so sick of feeling a certain way
then having it go away
dania Apr 2016
you call yourself the starriest gazer
sharpest blade on a razor

pull apart skin pull apart

faster

the starriest gazer, sharper taser

come apart faster now

sit on the grass
this afternoon- minds lazing
this afternoon- cows grazing
all gnawing on thought
all knowing of thought

but can you really know

and does this grass ever regrow

here i hear of home
here i hear of home and it is a twisted old melody
   humming back at me
who's humming back at me

in this deep-seated parental regard
will you look at me like i'm smart
about to take a scholarship from juillard

for the instrument of pulling apart
for the compositions of tearing heart
for the rendition of dizzy art
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