Click…
Click…
CLICK…
Earsplitting silence surrounds me
As I waste time envisioning a new setting,
Where my paper, pen, mug, and coffee are still there,
But the paper is bursting with passion,
And the magic of espresso beans enable the pen to float along my rapid thoughts.
Right now it is used to stimulate the monotony.
Unfortunately,
Money cannot be bled from words on paper and,
Beers are not bought with dedications in hard cover.
Click…
Click…
CLICK…
Yogurt wrappers opening, spoons being slurped.
***** expanding atop their encompassing chairs.
These are the thoughts that fill my head,
As co-workers plan the next birthday party,
The next lunch, client dinner, and snack.
It seems that bars do not enclose me at my desk,
There is no guard at the door and,
Above me the exit sign gives warmth.
Click….
Click…
CLICK…
Not today, today is not a good day.
There are presentations, Power Points, data to analyze.
Analyze feels like a ***** word in my world,
It covers my neurons and destroys imagination,
Synopsis seize to fire.
It seeps into my blood until I become a replica,
But it is the word that takes my balance off negative,
And applies charming labels to my purse,
I wonder if this is how it starts out for everyone,
Humans are adjustable, no batteries allowed.
Click…
Click…
CLICK.

in my stomach,
practically attached
to the indention that nourished me
in the womb,
a thread,
or string,
[some yarn?]
p u l l s
& I’m certain that,
should I follow it,
it would directly lead me
to you and perhaps this
a   c   h  e
will subside.

oh yes honey,
i miss your voice.
like hands around my neck.
like a crying
child.

I dreamt about flying again last night...
I had wings of an angel yet they were dark like the night sky.
I flew higher and higher, feeling the chilled air brush against my skin.
I had never felt so alive.
I mingled with the wind itself as I gained speed in this everlasting space.  
A man appeared flying next to me;
He was someone I had never seen before,
And yet I had known him my whole life.
He took my hand and instantly I was warm.
I knew everything about him and I knew he could see everything about me.
He whispered to the clouds as we passed by and they formed his words before my eyes.
Twisting and tangling the message fashioned out ever so gently,
As gentle as his words were when he first spoke them.
I love you. I need you.
Two simple words love and need,
Yet they are the hardest thing for me to give.
Saddened I looked away, but he was there.
It’s ok; he tells me, I love you anyway.
I was filled with a feeling so pure it went straight from my heart to the hands that held his.
I smiled and looked at what surrounded us.
There were birds below and stars above;
We were in between earth and heaven,
In between lust and love.
It was beautiful.
I looked back and was about to speak when I was struck,
By lightning or fire,
I’m not quite sure but it burned my hands.
I pulled away from his, quickly as if he was the source.
And regret instantly shot through me,
I tried to mend the broken touch but I was already at fault.
He had not caused the hurt,
But my body remembered faster than my brain could justify the sensation.
And so I fell recklessly,
Painfully.

When I woke I was alone,
Painfully.

You said the anger would come back
just as the love did.

I have a black look I do not
like. It is a mask I try on.
I migrate toward it and its frog
sits on my lips and defecates.
It is old. It is also a pauper.
I have tried to keep it on a diet.
I give it no unction.

There is a good look that I wear
like a blood clot. I have
sewn it over my left breast.
I have made a vocation of it.
Lust has taken plant in it
and I have placed you and your
child at its milk tip.

Oh the blackness is murderous
and the milk tip is brimming
and each machine is working
and I will kiss you when
I cut up one dozen new men
and you will die somewhat,
again and again.