𝗣𝗼𝗹𝗮 𝗕𝗲𝗿𝗹𝗶𝗻𝘀𝗸𝘆: Poems

If my Siamese twin were Lizzie Borden I'd be very nice to her because she could kill me with a hatchet while I was taking a bath or buying a lottery ticket.

𝗣𝗼𝗹𝗮 𝗕𝗲𝗿𝗹𝗶𝗻𝘀𝗸𝘆 Sep 12

If my Siamese twin were Lizzie Borden I'd be very nice to her because she could **** me with a hatchet while I was taking a bath or buying a lottery ticket.

If you love yourself at Burger King, you'll be arrested.

𝗣𝗼𝗹𝗮 𝗕𝗲𝗿𝗹𝗶𝗻𝘀𝗸𝘆 Nov 11

If you love yourself at Burger King, you'll be arrested.

I hate the way China keeps murdering people

𝗣𝗼𝗹𝗮 𝗕𝗲𝗿𝗹𝗶𝗻𝘀𝗸𝘆 Sep 17

I hate the way China keeps murdering people

who are practically innocent. Me too. 1 Friday night I'll go there & they'll be super sorry a lot. Maybe the pope will command Jesus to put a terrifyingly-powerful death-grip on their Stalin-loving throats till they crap-out in agony?

I hate Walmart more than life itself.

𝗣𝗼𝗹𝗮 𝗕𝗲𝗿𝗹𝗶𝗻𝘀𝗸𝘆 Aug 29

I hate Walmart more than life itself.

I have avoided smoking cigarettes but that hasn't stopped me from eating them.

𝗣𝗼𝗹𝗮 𝗕𝗲𝗿𝗹𝗶𝗻𝘀𝗸𝘆 5d

I have avoided smoking cigarettes but that hasn't stopped me from eating them.

I have avoided smoking cigarettes but that hasn't stopped me from eating them.

𝗣𝗼𝗹𝗮 𝗕𝗲𝗿𝗹𝗶𝗻𝘀𝗸𝘆 Oct 8

I have avoided smoking cigarettes but that hasn't stopped me from eating them.

I like elephants, but they take 6 days to cook. Rabbits are nice, with mustard.

𝗣𝗼𝗹𝗮 𝗕𝗲𝗿𝗹𝗶𝗻𝘀𝗸𝘆 Nov 9

I like elephants, but they take 6 days to cook. Rabbits are nice, with mustard.

I'll load the cannon before the morning gets hot and you'll fire the kill-shot, while mama naps on an army cot in the yacht that daddy bought.

𝗣𝗼𝗹𝗮 𝗕𝗲𝗿𝗹𝗶𝗻𝘀𝗸𝘆 Oct 3

I'll load the cannon before the morning gets hot and you'll fire the ****-shot, while mama naps on an army cot in the yacht that daddy bought.

I'm converting a class-A motor home into a school bus.

𝗣𝗼𝗹𝗮 𝗕𝗲𝗿𝗹𝗶𝗻𝘀𝗸𝘆 Sep 4

I'm converting a class-A motor home into a school bus.

I'm giving away a FREE DOG MAT

𝗣𝗼𝗹𝗮 𝗕𝗲𝗿𝗹𝗶𝗻𝘀𝗸𝘆 Sep 17

I'm giving away a FREE DOG MAT

to anyone who wants it. This is no ordinary dog mat. This one is autographed by Jay Leno and Tito Jackson with big hand-drawn red hearts on it and a smiley face that looks like Tito. I'm giving it away because I've become lame in my left leg. I'm having a doctor look at it in 3 weeks so I can't keep the dog mat. My uncle says that he would watch the mat for me till I'm able to walk normally again but I told him to ******* so that's that. Anyway, the dog mat's pretty nice and if you take it within the next 45 minutes I'll throw in a magazine with 3 ex-lesbians on the cover.

I'm not taking my clothes off till you can prove to me and my cousin that you're a real gynecologist! Challenge accepted! Alright. Here, please accept this knock-out drug. Okay.

𝗣𝗼𝗹𝗮 𝗕𝗲𝗿𝗹𝗶𝗻𝘀𝗸𝘆 Oct 22

I'm not taking my clothes off till you can prove to me and my cousin that you're a real gynecologist! Challenge accepted! Alright. Here, please accept this knock-out drug. Okay.

I'm not taking my clothes off till you can prove to me and my cousin that you're a real gynecologist! Challenge accepted! Alright. Here, please accept this knock-out drug. Okay.

𝗣𝗼𝗹𝗮 𝗕𝗲𝗿𝗹𝗶𝗻𝘀𝗸𝘆 Oct 14

I'm not taking my clothes off till you can prove to me and my cousin that you're a real gynecologist! Challenge accepted! Alright. Here, please accept this knock-out drug. Okay.

IMPOSSIBLE!

𝗣𝗼𝗹𝗮 𝗕𝗲𝗿𝗹𝗶𝗻𝘀𝗸𝘆 Sep 24

IMPOSSIBLE!

Paul Hugo Little (1915–1987) was an American pulp fiction writer and author of the historical novels forming the Windhaven series and The Hawk and the Dove series under the pen names Marie de Jourlet and Leigh Franklin James respectively. He was the author of 700 historical fiction, erotica and romance novels mostly published under pseudonyms.[1] He also published a few books under his own name including Chessworks (a book on chess theory) and The Condominium Trap (a literary novel).[2]

Kenan Heise of the Chicago Tribune says "The Guinness Book of World Records lists a South African woman, Kathleen Lindsay, as the most prolific writer with 904 novels. Mr. Little believed he was second, averaging a novel every week and a half since 1963."[1]
Little died in 1987 at the age of 72.[1]

IMPROVING A WHORE'S LIFE WITH RELIGION

𝗣𝗼𝗹𝗮 𝗕𝗲𝗿𝗹𝗶𝗻𝘀𝗸𝘆 Oct 2

IMPROVING A *****'S LIFE WITH RELIGION

I know you're mentally ******* but that was an hour ago, so now you're okay, climbing up and down my *** like a truck driver on Zyprexa. Don't muck it up mucky pup! I'll load the cannon before the morning gets hot and you'll fire the ****-shot, while mama naps on an army cot in the yacht that daddy bought. My improved parachute is a "care-a-shoot" because it can land you gently in daisies after a soft glide, even though you got more bullet holes in your **** than Bonnie and Clyde. Ben and I were passionately in love (with each other) till the day "she" came into our lives. I was working at Dairy Queen trying to gain weight when Benny landed his helicopter on the roof. There were asphalt shingles flying everywhere. Later, after I had Ben's child, we moved to Sumatra to live beneath the royal palm trees that dance in the breeze. "Oh Ben, why can't we love each other with the fiery passion that we once knew?"

I'm so alone, not counting all of the people around me even though there aren't any.

𝗣𝗼𝗹𝗮 𝗕𝗲𝗿𝗹𝗶𝗻𝘀𝗸𝘆 Oct 21

I'm so alone, not counting all of the people around me even though there aren't any.

I'm so alone, not counting all of the people around me even though there aren't any.

𝗣𝗼𝗹𝗮 𝗕𝗲𝗿𝗹𝗶𝗻𝘀𝗸𝘆 Oct 20

I'm so alone, not counting all of the people around me even though there aren't any.

In 2014, after a crew member on a Disney Dream cruise ship was caught on camera molesting an 11-year-old girl, the crime was reported after the ship left port to allow the man to evade arrest.

𝗣𝗼𝗹𝗮 𝗕𝗲𝗿𝗹𝗶𝗻𝘀𝗸𝘆 Sep 24

In 2014, after a crew member on a Disney Dream cruise ship was caught on camera molesting an 11-year-old girl, the crime was reported after the ship left port to allow the man to evade arrest.

In 2014, after a crew member on a Disney Dream cruise ship was caught on camera molesting an 11-year-old girl, the crime was reported after the ship left port to allow the man to evade arrest.

𝗣𝗼𝗹𝗮 𝗕𝗲𝗿𝗹𝗶𝗻𝘀𝗸𝘆 Sep 18

In 2014, after a crew member on a Disney Dream cruise ship was caught on camera molesting an 11-year-old girl, the crime was reported after the ship left port to allow the man to evade arrest.

In a bowling alley a few years ago I found a wallet that was full of money, just not enough money to open a bowling alley across the street to drive the fuckers who own this bowling alley out of business.

𝗣𝗼𝗹𝗮 𝗕𝗲𝗿𝗹𝗶𝗻𝘀𝗸𝘆 Aug 29

In a bowling alley a few years ago I found a wallet that was full of money, just not enough money to open a bowling alley across the street to drive the ******* who own this bowling alley out of business.

In a bowling alley a few years ago I found a wallet that was full of money, just not enough money to open a bowling alley across the street to drive the fuckers who own this bowling alley out of business.

𝗣𝗼𝗹𝗮 𝗕𝗲𝗿𝗹𝗶𝗻𝘀𝗸𝘆 Oct 28

In a bowling alley a few years ago I found a wallet that was full of money, just not enough money to open a bowling alley across the street to drive the ******* who own this bowling alley out of business.

In a wheat field where 3 wheat farmers reap wheat, shepherdess Bo Peep wouldn't let the love juices of her loving lover ram sheep seep into a neap tide of a Sargasso Sea's tree-seasoned, sea-weeded heap.

𝗣𝗼𝗹𝗮 𝗕𝗲𝗿𝗹𝗶𝗻𝘀𝗸𝘆 Sep 2

In a wheat field where 3 wheat farmers reap wheat, shepherdess Bo Peep wouldn't let the love juices of her loving lover ram sheep seep into a neap tide of a Sargasso Sea's tree-seasoned, sea-weeded heap.

I NEED NORMALIZED PEOPLE

𝗣𝗼𝗹𝗮 𝗕𝗲𝗿𝗹𝗶𝗻𝘀𝗸𝘆 Oct 15

I NEED NORMALIZED PEOPLE

to taste-test my poisonous food and to drink my arsenic-corrupted
water while I'm on holiday on Lake Huron before I leap off the top
of the Empire State building and go splat and maybe even die.

In eight years of repeated malfeasance, Pfizer has accumulated $3 billion in fines and civil penalties. (PMID: 21532766)

𝗣𝗼𝗹𝗮 𝗕𝗲𝗿𝗹𝗶𝗻𝘀𝗸𝘆 Oct 18

In eight years of repeated malfeasance, Pfizer has accumulated $3 billion in fines and civil penalties. (PMID: 21532766)

In high school I nearly killed the janitor when I mistakenly punched him in the throat, thinking he was a math teacher.

𝗣𝗼𝗹𝗮 𝗕𝗲𝗿𝗹𝗶𝗻𝘀𝗸𝘆 Nov 15

In high school I nearly killed the janitor when I mistakenly punched him in the throat, thinking he was a math teacher.

In high school I nearly killed the janitor when I mistakenly punched him in the throat, thinking he was a math teacher.

𝗣𝗼𝗹𝗮 𝗕𝗲𝗿𝗹𝗶𝗻𝘀𝗸𝘆 Aug 29

In high school I nearly killed the janitor when I mistakenly punched him in the throat, thinking he was a math teacher.

In my dream I saw you in a wheat field with a "brother" named Jamaal. He was eating a gerbil or an aquatic animal.

𝗣𝗼𝗹𝗮 𝗕𝗲𝗿𝗹𝗶𝗻𝘀𝗸𝘆 Sep 7

In my dream I saw you in a wheat field with a "brother" named Jamaal. He was eating a gerbil or an aquatic animal.

"In order to stabilize world population, it is necessary to eliminate 350,000 people a day. It is a horrible thing to say, but it's just as bad not to say it." — Oceanographer Jacques Cousteau

𝗣𝗼𝗹𝗮 𝗕𝗲𝗿𝗹𝗶𝗻𝘀𝗸𝘆 Sep 6

"In order to stabilize world population, it is necessary to eliminate 350,000 people a day. It is a horrible thing to say, but it's just as bad not to say it." — Oceanographer Jacques Cousteau

"In order to stabilize world population, it is necessary to eliminate 350,000 people a day. It is a horrible thing to say, but it's just as bad not to say it." — Oceanographer Jacques Cousteau

𝗣𝗼𝗹𝗮 𝗕𝗲𝗿𝗹𝗶𝗻𝘀𝗸𝘆 Sep 12

"In order to stabilize world population, it is necessary to eliminate 350,000 people a day. It is a horrible thing to say, but it's just as bad not to say it." — Oceanographer Jacques Cousteau

"In order to stabilize world population, it is necessary to eliminate 350,000 people a day. It is a horrible thing to say, but it's just as bad not to say it." — Oceanographer Jacques Cousteau

𝗣𝗼𝗹𝗮 𝗕𝗲𝗿𝗹𝗶𝗻𝘀𝗸𝘆 Nov 12

"In order to stabilize world population, it is necessary to eliminate 350,000 people a day. It is a horrible thing to say, but it's just as bad not to say it." — Oceanographer Jacques Cousteau

INSTRUCTED BY EX-LESBIANS

𝗣𝗼𝗹𝗮 𝗕𝗲𝗿𝗹𝗶𝗻𝘀𝗸𝘆 Sep 3

INSTRUCTED BY EX-LESBIANS

Put it in, not too far. How far? Till your fuel filter clogs. Here,
thank me for nothing. Remember that I'm only doing this part
of the time. The other parts are covered in warts & measles.

IN TIME FOR NEXT CHRISTMAS, BARELY...

𝗣𝗼𝗹𝗮 𝗕𝗲𝗿𝗹𝗶𝗻𝘀𝗸𝘆 Nov 2

IN TIME FOR NEXT CHRISTMAS, BARELY...

I thought about using used or existing ****** but the slots were too
narrow so I changed-up to Korean-designed slides that glide
so much easier. They're lubricated on both sides in sealed
pockets. Great Grandpa thinks they're better and he
ought to know since he and General MacArthur
defeated 2 million Korean partisans in 1951.

I OWE YOU A LOT!

𝗣𝗼𝗹𝗮 𝗕𝗲𝗿𝗹𝗶𝗻𝘀𝗸𝘆 Oct 7

I OWE YOU A LOT!

You killed my uncle when he said bad things about me and then you ground up his corpse and fed it to ***** coal miners. You painted my house with the goo of 512,500 tapeworms for free. You punched my sister so hard that her schizophrenia went away and now she works at Burger King making big money. You are like Jesus and His Dad and President Garfield all rolled into the same person. One day we will make 2 babies together and call them Elmer and Tonto.

I peel your feign, jungle-love is itchy, there's nothing to gain. Pull it away, the prison-food food tray.

𝗣𝗼𝗹𝗮 𝗕𝗲𝗿𝗹𝗶𝗻𝘀𝗸𝘆 Oct 8

I peel your feign, jungle-love is itchy, there's nothing to gain. Pull it away, the prison-food food tray.

I put a spoonful of sugar in my left bra cup. It hurt at first, but I got used to it.

𝗣𝗼𝗹𝗮 𝗕𝗲𝗿𝗹𝗶𝗻𝘀𝗸𝘆 Oct 28

I put a spoonful of sugar in my left bra cup. It hurt at first, but I got used to it.

I put a spoonful of sugar in my left bra cup. It hurt at first, but I got used to it.

𝗣𝗼𝗹𝗮 𝗕𝗲𝗿𝗹𝗶𝗻𝘀𝗸𝘆 Sep 5

I put a spoonful of sugar in my left bra cup. It hurt at first, but I got used to it.

I put a spoonful of sugar in my left bra cup. It hurt at first, but I got used to it.

𝗣𝗼𝗹𝗮 𝗕𝗲𝗿𝗹𝗶𝗻𝘀𝗸𝘆 Nov 10

I put a spoonful of sugar in my left bra cup. It hurt at first, but I got used to it.

I really hated you horribly a lot when we were 2 stuck-up ex-nurses committing crimes together in east Paris, France in navy pants with no pockets because of birth defects that dissolved our knee sockets.

𝗣𝗼𝗹𝗮 𝗕𝗲𝗿𝗹𝗶𝗻𝘀𝗸𝘆 Sep 26

I really hated you horribly a lot when we were 2 stuck-up ex-nurses committing crimes together in east Paris, France in navy pants with no pockets because of birth defects that dissolved our knee sockets.

I saw a big grasshopper eating a piece of cat food kibble on the front porch and yet I've never seen a midget hitch-hiking, nor heard a Chinese chick speak English with a Southern accent.

𝗣𝗼𝗹𝗮 𝗕𝗲𝗿𝗹𝗶𝗻𝘀𝗸𝘆 Sep 27

I saw a big grasshopper eating a piece of cat food kibble on the front porch and yet I've never seen a ****** hitch-hiking, nor heard a Chinese chick speak English with a Southern accent.

I saw a big grasshopper eating a piece of cat food kibble on the front porch and yet I've never seen a midget hitch-hiking, nor heard a Chinese chick speak English with a Southern accent.

𝗣𝗼𝗹𝗮 𝗕𝗲𝗿𝗹𝗶𝗻𝘀𝗸𝘆 Sep 5

I saw a big grasshopper eating a piece of cat food kibble on the front porch and yet I've never seen a ****** hitch-hiking, nor heard a Chinese chick speak English with a Southern accent.

I saw a big grasshopper eating a piece of cat food kibble on the front porch and yet I've never seen a midget hitch-hiking, nor heard a Chinese chick speak English with a Southern accent.

𝗣𝗼𝗹𝗮 𝗕𝗲𝗿𝗹𝗶𝗻𝘀𝗸𝘆 Nov 15

I saw a big grasshopper eating a piece of cat food kibble on the front porch and yet I've never seen a ****** hitch-hiking, nor heard a Chinese chick speak English with a Southern accent.

I shall shower alone (no police surveillance).

𝗣𝗼𝗹𝗮 𝗕𝗲𝗿𝗹𝗶𝗻𝘀𝗸𝘆 5d

I shall shower alone (no police surveillance).

There are no photographs of a globe, only composed images (painted compositions) from N.A.S.A. No one can produce an uncontained atmosphere bordering a vacuum.

░░░░░░███████▄▄▄▄▄▄▄▄
▂▄▅█████████▅▄▃▂
███████████████████
◥⊙▲⊙▲⊙▲⊙▲⊙▲⊙▲⊙◤..

You stole my heart
like a Chinese surgeon

Tripling my chances at love
Your twin triplet sisters are ****!

Doubling my chances at love
Your twin sister is ****!

Is that a picture of your mother? No, it's an Allis Chalmers farm tractor. Oh, it looks exactly like your mother for some reason.

𝗣𝗼𝗹𝗮 𝗕𝗲𝗿𝗹𝗶𝗻𝘀𝗸𝘆 Sep 17

Is that a picture of your mother? No, it's an Allis Chalmers farm tractor. Oh, it looks exactly like your mother for some reason.

Is the denunciation of evil

𝗣𝗼𝗹𝗮 𝗕𝗲𝗿𝗹𝗶𝗻𝘀𝗸𝘆 Sep 16

Is the denunciation of evil

that will come at the conclusion of my prophetic testament to the luscious maidens of Sumatra before Satan plunges them into inescapable darkness because no broken spine's going to stop me from climbing Mount Everest! You can fire bazookas at me and run my mother over with a snow mobile and I won't care!

Is there a market for these?

𝗣𝗼𝗹𝗮 𝗕𝗲𝗿𝗹𝗶𝗻𝘀𝗸𝘆 Oct 2

Is there a market for these?

Wiki: Tijuana bibles were palm-sized ****** comics produced in
the U.S. from the 1920's to the early 1960's. Their popularity
peaked during the Great Depression era.

Is there a market for these? Wiki: Tijuana bibles were palm-sized erotic comics produced in the U.S. from the 1920s to the early 1960s. Their popularity peaked during the Great Depression era.

𝗣𝗼𝗹𝗮 𝗕𝗲𝗿𝗹𝗶𝗻𝘀𝗸𝘆 Sep 6

Is there a market for these? Wiki: Tijuana bibles were palm-sized ****** comics produced in the U.S. from the 1920s to the early 1960s. Their popularity peaked during the Great Depression era.

ITCHIN' IN THE BITCHIN' KITCHEN

𝗣𝗼𝗹𝗮 𝗕𝗲𝗿𝗹𝗶𝗻𝘀𝗸𝘆 Nov 8

ITCHIN' IN THE *******' KITCHEN

It won't be long now, the snake's length, after I cut its head
off. I **** snakes, baboons & iguanas. I like elephants, but
they take 6 days to cook. Rabbits are nice, with mustard.

ITCHIN' IN THE BITCHIN' KITCHEN - It won't be long now, the snake's length, after I cut its head off. I kill snakes, baboons & iguanas. I like elephants, but they take 6 days to cook. Rabbits are nice, with mustard.

𝗣𝗼𝗹𝗮 𝗕𝗲𝗿𝗹𝗶𝗻𝘀𝗸𝘆 5d

ITCHIN' IN THE *******' KITCHEN - It won't be long now, the snake's length, after I cut its head off. I **** snakes, baboons & iguanas. I like elephants, but they take 6 days to cook. Rabbits are nice, with mustard.

I thought you were dead till I saw your large penis move ever so slightly like a small dog on a train or under a larger dog.

𝗣𝗼𝗹𝗮 𝗕𝗲𝗿𝗹𝗶𝗻𝘀𝗸𝘆 Oct 11

I thought you were dead till I saw your large ***** move ever so slightly like a small dog on a train or under a larger dog.

I threw out a bra that made my left tit numb. My brother wanted to make a sling-shot out of it but I wouldn't let him.

𝗣𝗼𝗹𝗮 𝗕𝗲𝗿𝗹𝗶𝗻𝘀𝗸𝘆 Aug 29

I threw out a bra that made my left *** numb. My brother wanted to make a sling-shot out of it but I wouldn't let him.

I TᕼOᑌGᕼT YOᑌ ᗯEᖇE ᗪEᗩᗪ ᗷᑌT, ᗩᒪᗩS, ᕼEᖇE YOᑌ ᗩᖇE.

𝗣𝗼𝗹𝗮 𝗕𝗲𝗿𝗹𝗶𝗻𝘀𝗸𝘆 Sep 19

I TᕼOᑌGᕼT YOᑌ ᗯEᖇE ᗪEᗩᗪ ᗷᑌT, ᗩᒪᗩS, ᕼEᖇE YOᑌ ᗩᖇE.