Horrorscope
from
Virgo
to
Virgone
All
my
things
i
had
to
have
Now
in
a
box
placed
on
the
sidewalk
As
she
yelled
"Get
the
****
out"
From
the
door-
step
Four
years
of
mad
love
bad
love
Finally
she
got
me
out!
Will
work
for
love
SIGN
Lie
She
knows
just
as
I
do
I'm
not
capable
Damaged-
goods

Dark thoughts come to life
In the dark hours of night

Lightyears ahead bright ideas born in open skies of day

Sunglasses at night a sure sign of a heart in disguise

We may be shades apart in life but I'll still save you

Internal warfare 
MENTALLY 
EMOTIONALLY
External warfare 
PHYSICALLY 
MENTALLY 
EMOTIONALLY 
Im not in the Military 
but why does it feel 
we abide by the 
DONT ASK DONT TELL 
AS A WHOLE 
AS A COUNTRY 
AS A WORLD
Im tired of bleeding
Im sick of temporary fixes 
I want to :
PERMANENTLY CHANGE

My
interior is superior
to my
exterior is inferior
My
internal is eternal
to my
external is ephemeral
But
you don't want
to get
to know the
REAL ME
superficial

You receive
what you retrieve

So if you hate
what you relate

Why reach for
the same thing more

You hate the fall
but love the ground

You feel looked down on
but you refuse to stand tall

Quit laying flat
like a welcome-mat

You seek energy
the same energy you
COMPLAIN about
IRONY

You are a result
of bad math

Well only you
can add or
SUBTRACT

Remove the bad
Before it changes you

Slowly taking over
YOURSELF

Otherwise
You might end up

At the point of
NO RETURN

I took a chance 
an unnecessary 
dance 
Thank God 
I made it home 
safely

To think all the inner issues
and the questions they bring

Are solved by outer solutions
and the answers they bring

Unlike words
we can create
our own antonyms
SEPARATE YOURSELF  

Unlike words
we can create
our own synonyms
RELATE YOURSELF

Unlike words
we can create
our own definition
DEFINE YOURSELF

Shower before you eat
so you can eat cleanly
Crave calories *****
so you eat like ****
Try this diet ....
Shower before you eat
You eat what you feel like
I feel like ****, before I shower
So I get clean
before I eat
take a shower
and eat clean
HEALTHY

Born a book with empty pages

Nurtured into loveless chapters

Raised into a book of terror

Escaped the book before the ending

Regardless what I do, I just can’t erase the summary of that story from before I became an adult

It’s a part of me that I can’t live without but rather have to accept in order to write on

So this new book will be filled with all my chosen words except for the intro

Because that’s who I was before
becoming the author of my life moving forward

TRANSFORMATION

Just when my love generator started running rough, I decided to give it a tune-up. It seemed to run better afterwards  but never as good as it did before that last breakup. That was until she came along and created a new spark, with little effort it started right up and ran..... ran real good.

I was given the gift to relate
I truly can preach
But not based on beliefs
I truly can reach
I was given the gift to feel
I truly can touch
But not based on religion
I truly can love
If only I could accept my call
If only I could save you all
But not because I have to
I truly can accommodate all

Beware it truly exists

Danger when it stares

Just stay hidden amongst the world

You don’t want to be spotted
or SINGLED OUT

Its watching us all BIG, small,
T
A
L
L

Any and all

You , me
him, her
and THEM

Power of three
triangle strongest shape
with three sides
3 stooges
3 little pigs
Big bad wolf
3 houses
or The most famous
“Third time is the charm “
let’s not forget
ABC to market the alphabet

123 to market the numbers

I know the powers of three , but do you

YOU
HIM
HER

Three words with 3 letters to cover all the sexes

Don’t take the 3 for granted

Don’t let the THIRD EYE
catch you OFF GUARD

1.Through him
2. with him
3. in him

1. G 2. O 3. D
GOD

Or
Lets

Not
FORGET

Mom, Dad, Dog, Cat

The list goes on

1. seconds 2. minutes 3. hours

1. days 2. months 3. years

Feet , inches , centimeters

Every Ruler READS

Spark , ignite, flame
123

Warm yourself up
here we go
its to easy
creating A poem
writing all verses
with 3 words
every single time

3.....2.......1........
AND BLAST OFF
here we go
space ship rocket
Off in sky
to another planet
to be victim
to the 3
and the power
it truly has
they too will
worship and follow
THE THIRD EYE

The machines governor dictates its performance
The mans Governor
dictates his performance

Kidnapped from birth
no ransom letter left
hostage to this life

Missing since day one
no reward letter left
gone from this world

My earliest memories
still hold me captive
buried deep within my mind

Years of torture
not always in the form
of physical pain

Years of struggle
a diverse combination
a ton of mental strain

A lifetime of sorrow held within the memory bank
of this battered brain

Yet I remain calm
pretending not to be lost
hid within my own world

Surrounded by false walls
over the many years
my subconcious built

Survival mode
has always been
the main mindset

Certain days
the walls were closer
than others

A few times
they seemed like
they were gonna cave in

To say I find comfort
within my mental confinement
is an understatement

It is all I have ever known
since that day I was taken
since that day I was born

PS: Jennifer I still miss you and I'm glad you found the courage to leave me alone

Within these walls, within my world, a soul as pure as yours has no place being

I wish I could escape and you could see me before the pain and experience the real me

But within these walls, I call home, regardless the turmoil that comes with the comfort

                          Sincerely, Rob

Get lost in the thoughts

and

find yourself amidst the

madness

Never take the insecurities for

granted

For without them it could be

worse

Look at others but don't

compare

It's not a competition but

rather

a comparison in an effort to

study

Your reflection has the only

eyes

that matter and until then

everyone

else is just a distraction

truthfully

It starts within amidst the

feelings

dissect the past and all the

decisions

Decipher between the forced

ones

versus the ones you would've

made

Relate the difference to your

morals

not the morals of the others

donated

Never feel guilty at the hands

of

the ones that helped create

the

Madness but rather

sympathize

realize NOW you have the

POWER

To CREATE CHANGE

REARRANGE

YOURSELF to fit the BUILD

DESIRED

FIGHT for the RIGHT to FEEL

BETTER

EARN the SECURITY and

HEALTH

YOU DESERVED all along

BELONG

to the VALUES YOU want to

BATTLE

the desires and temptations

UNWANTED

DEVISE a PLAN and BECOME

the

MAN or WOMAN better yet

PERSON

YOU WANT TO

OVERCOME

Subconscious spinning wheel dictating the various nerves
to be hit

As you take orders without any doubt causing actions to happen

Physically all over the matt being stretched in different directions

Until finally your mental decisions have your body spent

You hit rock bottom, falling all over yourself and the many colors

LoSt

Fire
No alarms
Just charms
Arms of others
No masks on
WHO GIVES A ****
we all get along
We don’t need parents
We have no
PRINCIPLES
“detention”
WE ALL BELONG
among the flame
among the smoke
We all get lost
in the
FLAME

You don't know
what you've been
TOLD
You don't know
what you've been
SOLD
Trust no one
dissect it all
LEARN
Trust no one
dissect it all
EARN

I hate statistics
because I have
defied all odds

Raised by a
single mom
no father

She had me
at the age
of only 16

Many step-dads
in and out
bad influences

3 more siblings
3 different dads
I was the oldest

Mom abused drugs
before finally
growing up

2 failed marriages
then finally
settled down

To the dad
of my youngest
two siblings

He was a wreck
alcohol abuser
bad tempered

Abusive to mom
and us kids
mentally unstable

9 different
public schools
total before 8th grade

I got good
at making new friends
out of necessity

Home was Hell
the devil my
step-dad

Subject to every
type of abuse
known to mankind

High-school dropout
teenage pregnancy
emancipated age 17

Finally free from
an unstable and
undesirable environment

I hate statistics
because I have
defied all odds

I've never hit a woman
I'm not dead from an
overdose or suicide

I battled my demons
with alcohol but never
led to doing drugs

I have remained
a good father
to my son

I've held a job
and always
have worked hard

Sure I have
my flaws
but dont we all

I've learned
about mental health
and how to grow

A lesson I wish
our schools
promoted more

I got my GED
I have a great
paying job

Statistics are just
very misleading sometimes
our hearts and minds

Can overcome all math
If we can realize
not all things are our fault

Look.........ahead!
you can control that up there.

Your heart hurts 
Its a thunderstorm 
tears from above 
keep pouring down
clouded visions 
from past storms 
cover the thoughts 
from your subconscious mind, hope hides above 
never within reach 
"TEACH ME HOW"
your voice screams, 
to break the doubt 
to let love in 
tears keep pouring down
waterfalls below both cheeks 
pale skin, sweaty palms
LET IT ALL OUT 
mEnTaL-bREaKdOwN
damaged brain 
broken heart 
insecure reflections 
tough love 
fictional intentions 
unacquainted values
DAMAGED GOODS 
please im begging.....
" LeT tHe DeMoNs OuT!"

See me , see me not

Enjoy me , enjoy me not

Tie me , tie me knot

TWISTED

Movies were invented to
"MOVE US"

Old movies are the
"BEST"

Movies adapted to
"MARKET US"

New movies are not the
"BEST"

Let me chase you
quit telling me no
Play hard to get
It turns me on
I’m not afraid
make me work hard
You know I deserve you
but that’s not always enough
I made mistakes
I let you down
You got hurt
you feel let down
Who I was
Isn’t who I am
We’re face to face
you keep telling me no
You’re easier to hear
when your running away
Please don’t ever stop
until you’re ready to be caught
I promise I’ll keep chasing
regardless the distance
I love you way more
then I ever showed
Not by choice
but rather fault
Even if it’s just
for make believe
Give me hope
and it’ll be easier to leave
But please don’t deny me
face to face stopped
I really need some confidence
without you it’s hard to find
You were my everything
and now you’re gone
I’m gone too
we’re through
My sanity lost
the exact cost
To losing
the love of my life

Imagine a waterfall of HELL
———A : ACKNOWLEDGE
🔥🔥🔥 L : life-threatening
     🔥🔥 C : codependent
          🔥 O : overbearing
            🔥H : HELP ME
              🔥 O : obtainable
               🔥  L : lost cause
🌊🌊🌊 🔥🔥🔥🌊🌊🌊🌊🌊🌊🌊🌊🌊🌊🔥🔥🌊🌊🌊🌊
CAUTION !! DEEP-END !!!!!!!!!
🌊🌊🌊🌊🌊🔥🔥🌊🌊🌊🌊🌊🌊🌊🌊🌊🌊🔥🔥🌊🌊🌊
🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥ALCOHOL is an addiction that is hard to shake but the first step you must take is to 🔥🔥
ACKNOWLEDGE 🔥🔥
🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥
It can become life-threatening
due to your body and brain 🔥becoming so codependent 🔥
from continued use over time 🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥
Quitting cold turkey can actually be dangerous due to how 🔥🔥overbearing the side effects can be HELP ME 🔥🔥🔥
🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥
Although obtainable to 🔥overcome this addiction you 🔥must have a strong game-plan and support system because all it takes is one mistake , one 🔥relapse and you’re a lost cause
DEEP-END 🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥
🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥       🔥🔥🔥🔥

🔥     🔥   🔥🔥🔥      🔥     🔥
🔥     🔥   🔥                🔥     🔥
🔥🔥🔥    🔥🔥🔥     🔥     🔥
🔥    🔥    🔥                🔥     🔥
🔥    🔥    🔥🔥🔥      🔥     🔥

Where’s the common sense
where’s the comments
Oh that makes sense
they can’t realize it

Mirror, mirror on the floor
shattered to pieces

If only you weren’t so guilty of being so true

Than maybe I wouldn’t of came so unglued

Letting my anger get the best of me from you

Mirror, mirror on the floor
I’m glad you are broken

All the reflections of myself you have projected

Never once have you told a little lie to cheer me up

Nor tried once to make me feel better about myself

Mirror, mirror on the floor look what you have done

This is all a result from your actions not mine

If only you knew how to be a better friend

Then you might still be on the wall but you’re not

Mirror, mirror on the floor you expose me

Time and time again never with sensitive skin

But rather eye for eye for who I really am

If only you knew how it felt to be like me

Mirror, mirror on the floor you now get a taste

For you can see your reflection through my eyes

How does it feel to see yourself broken ?

Finally you get a taste of your own medicine

Smoke myself stupid
release the pain
fade the problems away
NATURAL ESCAPE
gone

AHEAD
DEATH
BORN
                   ⬅️⬅️⬅️⬅️↖️
BEHIND                           ↖️
BIRTH                               ↖️
BORN                                ⬆️
                       ­                     ⬆️
BUT                                    ⬆️
WHAT                ­                ⬆️
LIES                                    ⬆️
BETWEEN                         ⬆️
                                             ⬆️
LIFE➡️➡️➡️➡️➡️➡️➡️⬆️

THROUGH  _ _ _
WITH _ _ _
AND
IN _ _ _

IT’S YOUR LIFE
YOU FILL IN
THE BLANKS

2.5 hours from home
just a one horse town
All the lights turn off
just about at 10pm
Except for two places
a Waffle House and a Walmart
So it’s very easy
to stay out of trouble
One of the best accounts
I have worked this year
I think the town suffers from boredom
So I got my suitcase, all my work attire is loaded along with some much needed EXCITEMENT
Here I come Wapakoneta Ohio
round two is just around the corner

Lately I’m not myself
I think
thats good
who I was before
I’m told
wasn’t good
it’s hard for me
to read
to dissect
to leave good feedback
for others
for friends
even my undeserving family
I’m sorry
it’s a
phase I’m going through
I apologize
to those
to who
to you, him, her
My flaws
are greater
than my strength sometimes
it’s sad
it’s mad
it kills me inside
to hide
to write
to fight these demons
hang on
let go
either way I understand
I didn’t
try to
ever plan this ever
but it’s
the reality
of my current situation
it’s hopefully
only just
a phase right now
not later
not again
but it’s who I
AM NOW

There’s a store
downtown amidst the other
small businesses
that towers over the rest
big and fancy
with copper trim and gutters
big glass windows
from the floor to ceilings
showcasing their
expensive and upscale linens
I pass this shop
every single morning and night
and it never fails
something always catches
my eyes every-time
It’s so odd because I’m not
a materialistic guy
nor could I ever see myself
spending the funds
it most definitely would require
to buy one of their items
however there was a time
when I thought it would matter
and that time reminds me
of her because for my love
price never mattered
this place gives me trace
to find memories
of when I was still with her
for her presence
of magnificent beauty too
with elegance that
always demanded my attention
and I realize everyday
as I pass by this place twice
how much I still
truly love and miss my Jennifer
although I must
understand and realize this
just like the store
she has nothing to offer me
but a nice view
for her love I cannot afford
nor any other
in my current condition
however that
doesn’t mean I can’t imagine
a day to come
when I don’t have to
window shop

........................GOD
                         O   E
                         N   A
                     N E E D
                     O
                     BUT
                     O
                     D          S
                     YOURSELF
                                   L
                                   FAITHLESS
                                   I
             THOUGHT S
                                  HOPELESS
                    ­                         O
                                              S
               ­                               TRAGEDY
                          ­                          L
                                     ­              O
                                                   N         J
                                                 BELIEVE
                                                       N     S
                                                               U
                                                       TRUST

I’m hurt and battered
my heart is shattered
my enemies all feel flattered
SCATTERED
DISAPPEARED
Sincere
I fear
NO ONE
NOR
MYSELF

I was complete 
until a trigger 
released my 
buried wounds 
I cried, profusely 
like a baby 
Yeah, im still not 
over it 
Man! what a past 
I have endured 
Im not proud 
of these scars 
These triggers 
might just be 
the death of me 
Ill never be healed 
because they may 
never be gone

She wants loved 
but doesnt know 
what it means 
to be loved 
unconditionally 
She wants loved 
but doesnt know 
love isnt all give,
Its a give and take 
to be loved 
She wants loved 
or so she thinks 
her idea of what
love means 
is far from fact 
She wants loved 
I see years of pain 
amidst her eyes 
as the words pour out 
when she vents to me 
She wants to be loved 
she is so oblivious though 
not realizing her and I
have been more intimate 
through deep conversations 
that required no strings 
because I want her to know...
I want to love 
and I want to be loved  
I know what it means 
to be loved unconditionally
so for that reason 
I will continue to be 
PATIENT 
Knowing past love lost 
has taught me 
greater pain is endured 
through the loss of love 
than the sacrifice to love slow
She is loved
but she just doesnt know 
because for once 
she is in control 
with no pressure or 
hidden agendas 
She is loved 
but who knows 
how long it will take 
for her to realize 
the beauty through my eyes 
from her eyes reflection of 
PAIN 
I LOVE HER 
I WANT LOVE 
I WANT TO BE LOVED 
SHE WANTS LOVE 
SHE HAS IT 
BUT WILL SHE EVER KNOW 
THATS FOR HER TO DECIDE 
OF LOVE TO BECOME 
OR FOR IT TO FADE 
I KNOW I LOVE HER 
BECAUSE IM REMAINING 
TO BE A GOOD FRIEND 
NOT KNOWING 
IF SHE WILL FEEL 
THE SAME 
LOVE IS UNCONDITIONAL

We’re both feeling
the pain
from the strain
in our hearts
it’s in our brain
it’s every-other THOUGHT
in our minds
so let’s quit thinking
even if just for a day
and night
let’s quit fighting
the demons
from lost love
Together you and I
LET’S PRETEND
we are all better
let’s take these
broken hearts
of ours
and mend two halves
TOGETHER
I know it won’t fix
what has been broken
I know
when tomorrow comes
we will still be hurting
but all that proves is
we are guilty of loving
with all we got
We got a room
on the water
the forecast is calling
for beautiful weather
so let’s put down
our heartbreaks
from others
that discarded us
and together
LET’S PRETEND
and even if
just for one day and night
let’s give up the fight
and put our battles
on hold
let’s warm the cold
let’s put
our best foot forward
and take a break
from heartbreak
You and I together
LET’S PRETEND

Love lost
lost ones love
gone

Never
ever to return
forever gone

A distant memory
you hold close
to your
heart

Tightly
you hold
onto it forever
trying to heal

The time moves
unlike your sorrow
unlike your pain
you feel
cursed

Hurt
you feel
their love gone
their love missed
Forever lost love

New place
new face
new steps to take
I can’t keep
chasing these dreams
retracing old steps
from others paths
they carried
me down
I must move on
I can’t give up
so close
but yet
far away
One step
one day
gets us all closer
​​​​​​​just try

Insecurities
WILL
trap you
OR
set you
FREE
ReBeL

................NORTH
                      

                      C
                      R
WEST      CROSS           EAST
                      S
                      S
                    
                 SOUTH

Motivation
in moderation
never over the top
STOP
Dedication
lacking moderation
always over the top
GO
Believe in yourself
nonstop, in abundance
lacking moderation
over the top, never…..
STOP
remain dedicated to yourself
and motivation will never lack
GO

I wasn't going to do it
but my phone told me to
I wasn't going to do it
but my friends said to
I wasn't going to do it
but my co-worker said to
I wasn't going to do it
but the voices in my head
told me I had to!
SCHIZOPHRENIA

There's a world
inside my world
within a world
of many worlds

Mind inside my
God created body
people inside my
God created earth

There's a world
inside my world
within a world
of many worlds

Mind inside my
physically abused body
danger inside my
physically abused earth

There's a world
outside my world
within a world
of many worlds

Body outside my
God created life
people outside my
God created earth

There's a world
outside my world
within a world
of many worlds

Body outside my
mentally abused mind
danger outside my
mentally abused earth

WE ARE IN
CONTROL OF OUR
EARTH CREATED MINDS

WE ARE ALL
GIVEN EQUAL LIFE
AND EQUAL EARTH

WE ARE IN
CONTROL OF OUR
EARTH CREATED MINDS

MAKE YOUR WORLD
WORTH HIS TIME
AND BECOME GODLY

Words
sound good or bad
Actions
feel good or bad
She said
quit saying
what you are going to do
and show me
So I took her advice
well it turns out
I’m just as bad
if not worse
and she gave me
horrible advice
When you are
unhappy and broken
everything you say
and everything you do
will never be good enough
Regardless the effort
it seems so obvious now
but in the moment
I could never understand it
LoSt, IgNoRaNt, UnAwArE
If only she knew
it never was on purpose  
If only she knew
in my head, in my heart
I had good behavior
and my intentions were pure
So the writing on the wall
never seemed clear to me
until now and I wonder
HOW? could I be
so dumb
Better LATE
than NEVER
She disagrees
because the damage
has been done
All her pain in vein
for someone else
to get the results
because she feels
she cannot forgive
regardless the struggles
from past baggage
she holds me accountable
for all my decisions
I see it being unfair
in my eyes, I cared for her
but to her all she sees
is my mistakes
if only she could
witness these “flaws”
through my eyes
with the mindset I had
then maybe she could
UNDERSTAND
On the other hand
I’m sure she could
claim the same thing
I really put her
through the paces
showing all my faces
expecting her to fill the gaps
Between the SPACES
of what is RIGHT and WRONG
Our love traces itself
from distant images
of our good times
as I only choose
to remember the GOOD
and forget the BAD
TRUE-LOVE

Now you see it
now you don’t
ALCOHOL

The pain was there too
but now it’s not
DRUNK

But once the BUZZ wears OFF
the ALCOHOL IS GONE
but the PAIN is
STILL THERE
TRUTH

Kick rocks
it’s water
under the bridge
sling mud
drag my name
in dirt
it’s all
salt
in my wounds
bleed
point fingers
label drunk
I’ll listen
I’ll watch
with sand
between my
toes
I’ll remain
a
BEACH ***
Unconcerned
about
your thoughts
so
****-off
FREEDOM

Hide and seek
the NARCISSIST
inside
PEEK A BOO
said YOU
to him
SEEN
Magic trick
you’re
GONE
My brain
Rubik’s Cube
DISARRAY
Left alone
INSECURE
and
SCARED
Hurt
my Angel
GAVE-UP
Lost
Well that was
THEN
The
NARCISSIST
is stuck with
YOU
Trapped in the
PAST
Battle
WON
Without
YOU

Adrenaline 
My drug 
of choice 
Every heartbreak 
every single lie 
made up
pumped blood 
ExTra 
getting me off 
to the drama 
love loves to be 
a part of 
pain 
Gain, game 
strain, insane 
GONE
lost, the cost 
HeAd-GaMeS
SHOTS 
relapse 
high again 
ON 
LoVe