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zozek Jun 2021
The sun dashes through the clouds
and shines on me among the crowds
                                            to hold my hand
not knowing that I am a barren wasteland
zozek May 2021
I water geraniums by the morning light
in order not to leave any slight
drop of water on the leaves
that would form a stain if it does not dry
in the sun

I shed tears at night
after everyone is out of sight
even if no one ever believes
that you bid bye
under the moon

the red geraniums are all crystal, ruby bright
and I promise I will be all right
zozek May 2021
to wash away the remains of the
wild tides
the wind needs to re-blow gently
and the waves need to tame the sand  
through kind caresses
untangling the dried out mosses
zozek May 2021
I cannot see
or change
anything

all my activities,
history,
photos,
and messages
are  gone
and when I die
all my browsing activity
will too be deleted
It feels like
I have borrowed
someone else's life
and living it
for a temporary while
and I just casually browse
don't want  
the rest to be recorded
incognito
just someone
zozek Apr 2021
Deepest sorrow near
Nearest sorrow is deepest
Sorrowest is nearing deep
zozek Apr 2021
Inconceivable
Compliments on my presence
Blind my dim essence
zozek Jun 2021
the bright pink dahlias
that stood for patience withered
eventually
zozek May 2021
the woman that you
left behind is heartbroken
in a plaintive cry
zozek May 2021
With a hope that it
will blossom one day, I am
watering fake plants
zozek May 2021
you look woebegone
in your forlorn effort to
escape sullen glum
zozek Apr 2021
I hate spring
hatching eggs
chirping birds
and blooming flowers
especially the disparagingly  
flourishing violet-blue, harum-scarum hyacinth
despite your aching absence
zozek May 2021
Honoring you each day and night with my immense sorrow
"my tears" is a tribute song to our love
and my aching heart is the statue of a you-less loneliness
I have realized that all the songs, poems, and statues are somehow heartfelt heartaches that I happily enjoyed.
zozek Jun 2022
Cautious  
You should have been
When uttering words
To someone
Who utterly loves words
Hel
zozek Jun 2021
Hel
I am the counterpart of death
living in this world
zozek Jun 2021
life the villain
you the hero
zozek Dec 2022
oh would someday the buds turn into leaves
and carry the way I feel into shoots
flowering worries in the dead ends of rotten roots
oh would somehow the soils soothe my soul
when no longer blood buds out
my vessels
zozek May 2021
each time
she opened
the box
to find
and release hope
another evil
came out.
zozek Jan 2022
We just sat there silently
and sipped coffee
without knowing that
you would leave around this time next year
hummingbirds would sip the most delicious nectars from the flowers
                            and hover, fly and glide in all directions
to pollinate life elsewhere
                                                                    and I would be left without you
zozek May 2021
Everything is crystal clear when
I put my glasses on
fields are green
life is not grim
lights are not dim
I see him
swim
in the turquoise blue waters
zozek Apr 2021
It seems you had the luxury to          dump             me                                            
You kissed me off and it was a          thumb            up                                                                                                              
                                                                Bump             the                                                                          
                                                                chump!
You                                                         grump!
My heart becomes a                             lump...
zozek May 2021
this intensifying pain
glorifies
our very existence
which would
otherwise
disappear
in invisible neutrality of taken for granted-ness
drowning
in a love-less
cool-headedness
zozek May 2021
I dream of poems every night
walk through the vast sunflower fields with delight
mourning doves fly around
bringing me peace, love, and hope abound

I dream of poems every night
wander around a dense woodland bright
and a red cardinal lands on my shoulder
sent from heaven, I know you are near.

I dream of poems every night
scuffle through a crowd but lose sight
when I run around to find you in vain
you die again and again
zozek May 2021
You really hate it when I text "bye"  

because you feel like I am parting away from you

I will never, ever say "bye" again

if  we ever reunite
zozek Jun 2021
love me not
if you cannot
see me not
if you don't mind
zozek May 2021
I look worn out
Totally torn apart
I'd love to restart
but you now depart
you say "we cannot go back"
and "we need to get back on track"  
would you like a snack
before you turn your back?
zozek May 2021
No one wants to hear a bad story
"sad" is the last in their feeling inventory
your sorrow intervenes with their happy territory
and they are already fed up with all that childhood allegory  

when they look into your eyes
they see death in disguise
no one gives them a prize
for listening to your advice
to be precise
the only thing that actually matters in life is a bit of a spice
otherwise
life is all inadequate, vague, and imprecise
zozek Jun 2021
She has always been the midseason
not cold, not hot
not dry, not wet
not cloudy, not sunny
not windy, not still
without knowing this
moderate
and mild in nature
Meanwhile, he has been the dead season
without knowing that he is dead
zozek Jun 2021
It takes a chilling kind of heartlessness
to deny your love
you are the gale breezing through
to fill the air I breath
zozek Jun 2021
I have walked
many miles
within myself
towards me
because walking
outwards is
solely impossible
zozek Jul 2021
I now know that I know
Nothing will slip by
like time
and there will not even be a why
Roll all woes up the hill
but they roll down
every time
I near the top  
I now know that I know
this will repeat for eternity
life is a series of unfortunate
boulders of woes
zozek May 2021
Walking towards the unknown
Away from the well known
A precious stone ornamented glamorous crown
Of a dignified and refined love and affection
This only sounds like fiction
Although we used to talk about all this with conviction
When we were waved with a magical wand
The whole world had turned into a heart-lifting and fulfilling beau monde
perfection  

The crown
Fell off and hit the ground
Turning me into a clown
All the gems and jewels spread and broke up
Like filthy germs floating around
zozek May 2021
I lag
behind everything
I just hang
breathing
fall back
creeping
lack
sleeping
a constant jet lag
and heart seeping
makes me gag
for one thing
I nag
needing
you
zozek Sep 2021
silenced by the impossibility of reaching you
in my eyes, with the worst hue
my brain full of hays
stricken by the  nays
will we ever?
it seems we will never
get to hug
life will only shrug
newly touched hands
are now full of bans
in unknown realms
zozek Sep 2021
we have been left behind
by the morning beams
the sun will never shine on us
ever again
the bird flying over us will not even see us and pass by flapping
this flipping life will not be ours anymore
the sunflower in the living room will be buried forever in ever depressing catatonia of not being able to move towards the sun
we will never catch it turn its head up towards the sky
we always knew that it was handcrafted anyway
but hope is the ladder that keeps everyone above
I bet you too knew that we would not last
when the two of us were drowning in a glittering and ever shinning shimmer of love
zozek May 2021
Cuts, bruises, and a deep and scary wound
The whole life turned into a grimy pond
of ugly frogs and nauseous frogspawn
Bulged with pus, poison, and pain
Whichever you kiss
You get the icky taste
of a painful and quick death
zozek Jan 2022
Knowingness
it is "the not knowing" that is the worst
shrewd and sharp the truth should be
or else
I would not be ignorant, illiterate, and ill-informed about
where you have gone feeling heedlessly
lost in this hazy knowing-less
veiling the known
zozek Jul 2021
poems ought to be short to reflect life
but unlike life smooth and free of strife
poems should be abrupt
to reflect death but unlike death should not interrupt
zozek Apr 2021
Let love fool you
Listen to it
answer all questions
but give the wrong password
and block all
Love scenarios and acting
Let people act
we are all actors anyway
and life is the biggest scam
ever
fooling us all
zozek Apr 2021
when I hide my face behind my hands
does life still continue with demands
and all its harshness and bad plans
through all the toxicant pangs?
I will keep my eyes closed and hold my breath
Until you come back from death
zozek Aug 2021
Wandering around the hopeful smells of lilies
They are so very you and me
Fresh fragrant pleasant and sweet
But your absence puts me in an awkward position
Slipping in and out of a doze
Through my clouded consciousness
And foggy brain
I can clearly smell the hopeful smells of lilies
They are so very you and me
Fresh fragrant pleasant and sweet
You subtly waft through the room
Ambrosial memories bring you back
zozek May 2021
A canvas of paint orchids without colors
no odor nor color
a guitar without chords to play uncord passions
a no-sugar, gross candy
and food without salt
trying to put on a no-fit, way too small ring, and ****** bijoux
pitching hallucinations  
disturbing auditory and visual illusions
without you is all about insanity
a lipogram of taboo words
constant and monotonous anguish
just banal mortality...
zozek May 2021
Sometimes we can only see the blossom
when we hit the bottom
little joys of life
help to strive

I know you care about me
and this sets me free
and let me be
bringing me a cup of tea
zozek Jun 2021
I could only see the joy of life in your eyes

apparently, I will not be able to find life elsewhere
...or anywhere
zozek May 2021
We have been lost in each other a thousand times
when sleeping on painted crimson clouds  

and I know that I will get lost
in sketched black labyrinths that have no exit a million times
I hate being stuck in an incomplete draft that will never be finalized
zozek Apr 2021
every night I strive to bury your love in the mud
my hands and heart full of blood
next morning it reblooms with greater vigor
bypassing my rigor
enlightening me about your rebirth with all your purity
and rarity
zozek Jul 2021
you were the closest dot
standing next to me
we visually blended together
to look like love from a distance
zozek Apr 2021
We have been
sealed
beneath my
fleshly
earthly
corporeal  
somatic
existence
through
tangible
appetites
and plausible
pleasures
of various sorts...
zozek May 2021
grief
in brief
is love
conserved
your sudden death
is like a shock- freeze of my love
and I will thaw it when you come back
zozek Jan 25
black leather fineness complements my shimmering legs
As we ride on the car to follow downtown city lights
Then you smile looking into my eyes
Mischievously, matching mall luminaries on the way beaming bright and brilliant
Laughing eyes under long lashes
Passing through the fleet of cars
We hold hands in the shadowy passage of time love whispers
Without uttering a single line
zozek Apr 2021
Sing lullabies
To soothe my soul
Beating hard like that of a poet’s
Reading his first poem
Under the flickering flame of his mind

Sing lullabies
To liberate my spirit
Aging like my worn-out body
Dying its first death
Under the fluttering fear of my heart
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