She woke me at dawn,
My heart felt at ease.
For a moment I imagined in a dream.
But she said; it is time,
The time I guiltily yearned for years.
I never had to let go- it seems.
She was an unwanted guest,
But I had to show ubuntu.
Invite her in, seat with her against my will.
She was never my enemy,
But the companion who took my love's place.
She was torture,
She isolated me,
Turned me into a coward,
Drove me to psychiatric wards,
And repeatedly told me; she is no more.
And just like that,
At 2 A.M,
She told me; my time to leave has come.
As she freed me,
Into a world I shied away from for years.
She whispered; Go see them.
A visit grief delayed for years.
#I guess this is the moment my grief told me to go see the family I last saw at the funeral. It feels a little late, but maybe it is not for them, but for me too.