I caught something so heavy.
One meant to be caught with four hands,
To be carried by the strength of two.
Excitement got a hold of me, I forgot its weight.
And so, I held on for longer than I should have.
With all my might I held it closer to my chest.
And finally its weight overcame me.
And so I hit the ground.
It sunk into my chest and injured my heart.
I looked to you and wondered why you never helped.
As the pain grew, words became impossible.
And tears seemed to be my only voice.
With the hope that somehow they help lift the weight on my heart.

I told you I loved these sweets,
And now, I never run out of them.

You spend these extra hours in loneliness.
And now, I have begun arriving home late.

You never have time for breakfast at home.
Now the journey to the store for breakfast has become my routine.

My walk is clumsy.
Somehow before a trip your arm ushers me into safety.

As water sets in the turbulence,
Layer by layer, drop by drop.
In these trivial moments.
We are woven into patterns,
Geometric with their precision.
From the chaos we crystalize into Beauty.

One could not be so kind to self,
One cannot be so merciful to self,

It can not be painless to me
Yet horrendous to you,
For it may take me moments,
Hours perhaps,
And it will take you a lifetime

To end my pain,
I begin your suffering.

For my love,
I can never make it easy.
I must set ablaze
Every cell must scream your name.

To extinguish the fire within,
I must start a fire without,

I must scream in agony,
Of my betrayal,
To your love.
To your rights.
Oh! Mother!

For I have been selfish.
My very last punishment
Must never be easy.
For it will not be easy on you.

It all fell apart,
To fall in place

Perhaps,
Our journey together,
Is to help each other
Nurse our wounds
And not fall in love

Knowing you,
Loving you,
Leaving you,
Hating you,
Regretting you,
Missing you,
Losing you,
Forgiving you,
The ordeal is
I cannot seem to forget you

He hears the weeping,
But I cry in silence
Maybe
That is why he never heard my cried

He never lets your tears hit the ground
I wipe mine on my cheek
Maybe,
He never got the opportunity to wipe them

I weep for the last time
Weep looking at him for last
He's never held my hand
I'll let the wind hold me

With What Should I Stand?
The Broken Legs Of Mine?
You Snatched All My Support.

Is It That You Want To Be My Only Pillar?

In Doing So,
You Have Broken Me,
Bruised Me,
Made Me Hopeless,
Faithless.

When You Stretch Out Your  Hand,
I Will Wonder
If That Which Once Took All From Me
Is Worthy
To Be Trusted
To Be My Support

Wishing our hearts were intertwined. The sync of each beat a conversation.
With every contact as transparency.

A horrid wish that is.
I wish that could change me in your yes.T

My soul sought the feeling,
Something so popular,
Yet so rare in my sight.

My heart longed for the ultimate,
Transforming in hopes to lure it,
Both patience and hope were lost

My mind became a genie out of care
Forging and attaching,
To fulfill the wishes of the heart.

And so I learnt,
Its a feeling that sprouts from within
It never was in the world.

And I also learnt of the deceit
The longing and desperation
But I needed to find it within
Something I never had.

What charms and spells do you possess?
I cannot continue rejoicing over your hold.
With you I can say,
"Surely I know the taste of poisonous water,
It has a beautiful timing,
Comes as a cold beverage
In an angry summer
Pleasurably passing through my lips,
Peacefully sliding through my tongue
Hugging every inch of my mouth
As it fulfils its purpose of bringing me into captivity
My heart surrenders before it quenches my thirst
As your sound passes through my ears
Like sweet melodies,
My whole body surrenders

The footprints of my journey
The victory crowns  of every battle
A scar free body is fashionable,

I am a whole body of art not trend

Desirable is not the worrior's journey
It's an artwork to be analyzed
A craft desirable upon understanding

A precious jewel untouched

He held her hand,
Forcing a straight face,
But with just one glance
His eyes watered,
Exposing what was hidden in his heart

He acted like I didn't exist
His eyes told a different story
As the pain of shattered hopes he had
Slammed his knees with a hammer
I watched him grow weak in love

My presence contaminated the air
And slowly he began suffocating
With every second the mood dropping
The traffic lights gave him torture

My soul hurt at the sight of his pain
Afterall, a shattered glass ****** the hand that picks it
Not once had this heart dreamt to be poison
Yet again I left him
With hopes she'll heal his heart

Why chase the sun,
When the moon awards peace?

My skin has fallen for this cold breeze
The star's glare has stolen my stare

Your gloom gifting serenity
Slowly setting my soul ablaze

Your entire reign kissing my soul
Midnight to dawn our time my love

Never served with a silver platter
'You have to understand'
'You are strong you don't need it'
Every pain regarded as a complaint
Every need considered greed
Learnt to look down often
Closed doors in fear of being dramatic
Every pain suppressed
Only to be let out in solitude

Found strength in the corners
Found comfort in isolation
Made friends with the wind
Found happiness in imagination
"You are so kind, so wise"
That's the only way I've learnt
A "You don't matter" hidden behind "strong"
So I try to be there for others
The way I wish someone was there
Thought myself advices I knew would never come

"Why are you always angry"
I'm sorry but you've never taught me to smile
For every kind, someone wanted to take
So I try to make things balance
"You're always quiet"
Have you ever listened?

Anxiously waiting for the future
Maybe I'd be free
Life Would be better and happier
I try to make it better
Has anything changed though?
Fate is playing a game of turns
With different souls
So what do I look forward to?

The Love You Give...
Sweetheart You Truly Are A Gem...
You Posses The Rarest Of Souls...
The Purest Of Hearts...
I Would Choose To Love You...
In All Lives Given...
Over And Over Again...
I Would Doubtlessly Choose You...
I Wouldn't Think Twice...

There there my rare gem
Do not fear the ghosts
Do not fear the evils and the tales
Close your eyes and feel

There there my kind soul
Your kindness remains untainted
Do not fear being lost
You are the torch

There there my pure heart
Do not be afraid, open up
Your cup will forever overflow
Forget the world and love endlessly

After all the stops,
The heart told her to
After all she's seen and heard
The heart wanted her to
After all it's felt
It still wanted her to take that step
But why?
All was before her,
Nothing new to be seen or felt
Because it's wise.
It new what it needed to leave
Without it, it wouldn't leave
She might, but it will always look back
So she listened
And she set it free.

Her mind resurrected
And reclaimed it's reign over her kingdom
After all the stones,
Who knew a pebble would free the heart?

Her majesty rose,
All the seas went calm and bowed
The parting of the seas felt between her ribs
Tardily and gracefully strolling
Every step  ground shaking
And finally she stood before her throne
Wore her crown and raised her sceptre
And to all it was known,
The Queen had ressurected

He will miss you, said the heart
He will miss the calls,
Your voice, that little blush
He will miss you smile,
Laughter and the way you look at him.

He will miss the fool he made of you
Your anger, vulnerability before him
He will miss your gullibility
But never your love, replied the mind
A great conflict within surged

So the universe made a deal with sight
And before my eyes it was revealed,
My time before him passed,
He didn't think twice,
Never took the chance to miss me
His mission was complete
He had no reason to look back.

And suddenly, everything within ached
A great grievance felt,
And a step was needed

Forgive her for admiring herself
For looking too much in the mirror
For loving what she sees

Forgive her for wasting time loving her
But, for the first time she sees her
And she sees the beauty.

Many a times she's felt worthless,
Told her beauty is an illusion,
Subtracted from every equation
Her flaws pointed out
And hung before crowds to shame her
She's been used,sidelined
Used as a substitute,
Made an option, taken advantage of
And expected to smile

Now she sees her worth.
I'm sorry, but she's done
So forgive her, but she won't stop
She'll love herself even when it hurts.
She won't stop even if it bleeds.

Is it lost?
Then why do we look for it?
Is it hiding?
Then why are we set on finding it?
Is it running?
Then why do we chase love?

Many a times it comes to us
When we are through coming after it
Going on our daily lives
We don't find love,
It finds us
So why are we looking?

I hate it here,
In this box called my room
It's lonely and dark
With a turbulence of emotions
The waves bury me sometimes
And I drown for a little while
I suffocate in this airless box
Sometimes I get out
But the demons outside thirst for my blood
I feel I'm safer here,
But I'm suffocating.

If I cried, would it hurt less?
If I screamed to the top of my lungs,
Would the pain disappear?
Back and forth it's become a norm
Don't I deserve a chance at happiness?
Go through it all over again
Just with different people
And in different forms
Philia, Storge and always returned Ludus and Eros.
The disappointment and disgrace
All could never measure to the suffering
Why is it so easy for you?
Why do I have this heart?
Why trust when you fall for the same trap?
Above all,
Why don't I have the voice,
The strength to screech
Why does even the thought fail me?
All I want is to cut my chest open
And release the tear logged heart caged within

You look straight in my eyes
I get an uncomfortable and sweet warmth
My cheeks toughen up and pull back
My lips betray me
As they stretch into a smile

Your love runs on a different path
Every word you say  excites my being
My soul slowly grows
You thread on spiritual sexiness
I was attracted to your cover,
But within, I found soulfood

Many have made me consious of my beauty,
But you spent so much time complimenting my soul,
Praising my aura and slowly adding on to a cup I thought was full
The love you give is better than a fairytale.

I'm not a pretty princess and you're not a prince charming.
I'm a flower, and you a garderner
You love my fragrance, you love my beauty,
But unlike many, you don't pick me
You don't want to make something out of me
You know I'm better off in nature than part of a bouquet or perfume
You water me daily
Throughout seasons
When I wither, blossom, you love me still
Your love scares me