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A

I wonder to world with her board
To calve out songs that smell vile
She would bite my ears as a cord
But the love was dead as death is alter
My love can't be sold for real, she knew
Never loved me never never and ever
Living inside the white garment to ******
She pretends to admire her desire

Her heart flew in the dew with few crook.
Cup in her scent of my handsome look
Lover boy glower son of one woman
Love me when am down and drown
Not when I fly and high cloud in the sky
Call me name to tame my sway baby

Haunted
Even midnight dreams are shadowed by
The most humiliating failures
And the inability to cope
In areas where I formerly excelled.

Tormented
By my need to get it right
While watching myself get it wrong
And race in all directions
In the hope of fixing things.

Ridiculed
And made to answer for
The things I used to do so well
And now can’t do at all
While there’s no place to hide.

Waking
From another graphic vision of
My inability to do the things that I did best
That specter follows me into the day
Eliminating any hope of joy.

Crying
One more day begun with tears
And lack of understanding of
The reason for the torture
That my dreams inflict on me.

Thinking
Was I bad and evil in my youth
Has it come back to haunt me now
No, I do not think that’s it
I am my own worst enemy.
The one to blame is only me.
               ljm

petals close when you are near

stars shudder at your finger tips

the moon shakes in it’s silver skin

and I -

blossom,

despite myself and my heart’s warnings

against your cruel caresses

I sigh, into your curves

and bury my head in the sands of oblivion