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41 · Jan 2020
Alone
Cruz Jan 2020
What I wanted you did not
the dreams I had were not yours
The beauty I saw you closed your eyes
What I tried to share you rejected

There is pain and there is nothing
I wanted the world
but you didnt want me
you didn't want anything
but to feed your underworld

So im lost, and alone
im on my own forevermore
Life will change
i will never be the same

my broken heart
will never beat the same
but I will live on
and find song to sing
and place to cling

and one day maybe you'll see
that I was there for you
that you ran, and thought your were free
but in truth is you just shackled yourself
because sometimes what we need,
is to help ourselves
41 · Mar 2020
Untitled
Cruz Mar 2020
I will live on
And find myself
Buried underneath
All the things happened before you
So I'll dig my way through
Till my heart is clear and pure
I'll be ready to love you
To say each and every day
So that you know
I've always felt this way
No one else even comes close
They aren't the same
Every word, kiss, and love you
Was never so strong
You are weren't wrong
We were ment to be
And to be side by side along
So I'll love you from afar
Till the time comes and well never part
She needed to find herself, I need to let it out I loved her
40 · Jan 2020
Dreams
Cruz Jan 2020
Would you like my kiss
To taste me on your lips
To feel my strong embrace
Make your heart go to a special place

To feel my finger on your skin
Trace it's way along your body to no end
Feel my body next to yours
Each touch just reassures

My eyes locked in your gaze
Ignite passion set us a ablaze
Feel me ****** deep within
Lustful and free till our heads spin

Would you like to wake
Me next you knowing it not a mistake
Giving you the love you missed
Assured in the man you took risk

Would you
40 · Jan 2020
Challenges
Cruz Jan 2020
I'ved climbed the tallest peak
Been to the placest most seek
Taken daring blind leaps
Braved the darkness and deep

I've been beaten down
Pushed in the water, left to drown
Used and left ******, bruised
My wounds fester and oozed

My strength tested
My will bested
Flown high in the sky
And crashed many times

They wait for me to quit
To not move just sit
But I will not lay down and die
There are mountains to climb

And even if I tumble down
Crashing with the loudest sound
I'll know I saw the top
A view I loved alot
38 · Mar 2020
My loves way
Cruz Mar 2020
It hurts deep inside
I dont know if will ever subside
My hearts a wreck no end insight
Will someones love ever be right
I'm poet and I love like one
Lovers use me up till I'm done
Left there empty and in pain
Though I say to them never again
The moment they need me
I saddle up and try to be
The man and lover they need
My own words I never heed
I build them up and my love helps them fly
But when they're better it's always good bye
Even though I know my love is true
It's not enough for them or you
Fancy houses and new cars
All it cost is you is an empty heart
Or someone that will treat you cruel
But I'll never be anyones crowned jewel
Cause life is real and a poet is a dream
So I live this over and over it's my life's theme
To make you feel true loves warm embrace
And have another door slammed in my face
But I know no other way, I just pray
That someone will love me back one day
37 · Jan 2020
Never Dying
Cruz Jan 2020
The words pour from me
Every one starts with you
They are never ending
Each testifies to your beauty

They are the fruits of your endeavors
Blossoming on to paper
Filling the pages with my heart
Hoping to touch your soul

Letting you know that every kiss real or sent
Is felt not just on my lips but in my poetry
Because I may die, you may forsake me
but those words will live on.

Everyone that reads them will ignite
And know how I loved you
With touch, passion, with my tongue, my body and with my words.
34 · Jan 2020
What if
Cruz Jan 2020
What if ...?
Two simple words
That fill me with dread
The manifestation of my fears
And the things I did

The twist and turns I chose
Were they the correct choice, who knows
But part me will always wonder
Loves and loss, high and lows to ponder

Did she feel the same way
Was it true love and I walked away
Did I let my fears hold me at bay
Maybe that path lead to better days

Roads that lead to many paths
We never know if it's to good or bad
If they'll leave us happy or sad
The one thing I do know about them
Is "what if's" can be forgotten
34 · Jan 2020
Writing
Cruz Jan 2020
The words burn in me
I feel each syllable
As I write them down
My blood stains the page
For what is it I write
If not my fears, doubts, and dreams
The highs of love,
And lows of heart aches
Days I stood in the sun
And ones where there was none
You read them and embrace the poem
Not knowing that it's my soul I'm showing.
The next time you read one
Wipe the page see if it runs red
Or you learn what's in my head
33 · Jan 2020
Pinocchio
Cruz Jan 2020
I'm a dream
Not really real
But here I stand
Trying to make you feel

If you only knew
How much I wanted it be true
Make this pinocchio
Into a real man not a boy

Filled with joy
And not another toy
Maybe I'd show you
That dreams can come true

That the faith you had
Will one day serve you
And I'll be that man you held
Not just another pinocchio

Not in a fantasy world
But in your arms
And make your heart twirl
You'd be my good luck charm
31 · Jan 2020
Not Enough
Cruz Jan 2020
Ever feel like your not enough
That you fall short of the prize
No matter how hard you tried
The brass ring is unattainable

That the gods have held you back
Fought till there is only the attack
And when you think you've won
Watch all you've done come undone

Know that though you do right
It wont matter in the end
You were never ment to win
Life tries hard to extinguish my light
30 · Apr 2020
Running Opponent
Cruz Apr 2020
The sound grows louder
You hear only the patter
Every breath is a test
I will not let myself rest

I see my opponent, his shadow closing in
My body struggles, it pays for my sins
As my mind races to find an answer
Doubt creeps in like cancer

I will not let it bring me down
Block out all of the sounds
All the time I put in, lead to this
I will taste victory's sweet kiss

Of this my opponent will agree
Because my opponent is me
You race yourself
29 · Jan 2020
Unloved
Cruz Jan 2020
I gave my heart, my soul, my all
Sacrificed, feed, and nurtured and loved
I held it deep when life made it crawl
I did my best to give it wings to soar like a dove.

But when I hurt, when I cried.
It didnt care, all it did was run and hide
When I beared my deepest thoughts and pain
All it would say its just rain

I tried to share dreams and hopes
She in her heart just said nope
I thought we were making a life
We were sharing the strives

Though I loved her with all that I am
She lied, hurt and then ran
I was unloved and never knew it
for years I was alone and never saw it

— The End —