See to wash the times of doubt
Hear to hands gasp away
Lips to close the voice I speak
Life to shut my world I keep

See of bright no colours of true
Hear I fall black to shade
Lips to strum the fret of free
Life to shut my world away

See of blue washed to be gone
Hear no fear the castle I made
Lips to stop the sand of grit
Life I loved stopped to stick

Secret I have is my love of cabbage
Prefer the smell of eau sauvage
Green water to drink to clear your skin
Im sure tastes better with gin

Secret I have I play the guitar
C major I know to every tune
Strum the chord I sing the blues
Star I think but not a ****** doo

Secret I have no love to shop
The list I write the one thing I forgot
Too many varieties  my mind to seize
Two hours later to buy four tins of beans

Secret i have love to write a rhyme
No meaning or sound jumbled In time
To me I think I’m Oscar Wilde
No secret to hold I’m  the nutty child

Colours of life no end of gold
Mask to hands warming of brave
Far we stay help to hold
Pity no self the fight they save

Brave in blue badge to show
Protect inside world to open
Breathe to breath life they grow
Bless of NHS no hearts of broken

Swim shallow waters
Ending  the bridge of vision
Sticks down of frozen

If I’m gone tomorrow
Forget me not

If I’m here tomorrow
Joy no forgot

If I’m gone tomorrow
Footprints we trod

If I’m here forever
Present or past to live no lost

Windmills of yellow
Spring of joy where to begin
Warmth to cover wings

Time to stop the watch of hidden fears
Love holds a breath forever run tears
Face those eyes to heal the sores
Black out of memories mourning appears

Reach out once more the search began
To hide inside no ray of sun
One by one to push each door
Keys to hold unlock of eyes that saw

Face the cold no hat to keep warm
Stuck in time alone of sworn
No judge to stand to sentence the time
Prison inside was the child of mine

No fight I have left to steal
Rhymes that showed my words of real
No bags to carry empty to fill
Wonders of world believe to heal

Little I walk in days gone back
Plaster the walls of hidden cracks
Porch of doors that begin to open
Sores to remember no time of chosen

Room of games crossed to play
Eyes to burn no words of say
Hands held out numb no crutch
Pray of hands squeeze to hush

No face to see to shut outright
Blank out to return day of night
Fly of time went by and by
Relive of life to bury the lie

Times of trouble forget what’s past
Here and now will leave as fast
Hold of breath the mighty gasp
Forever green ends winding path

Cup of hands to plead we ask
Hear to walk and wear of mask
Hold back no touch is our task
Safe to lock the light from dark

Over to save our world to peace
To find to be no life to cease
Push through the world to release
Be one to fight C O V I D

Ask me how I want my time
Shout to speak back of mind
Play no act of visions to show
Stop the lies hidden I know

Ask me how I want my time
Fear no fear of what’s behind
Trust my mind body to care
Stutter to stop release to share

Ask me how I want my time
Pray the night to sleep of rhyme
Black of board add to take
One wish in well to make me safe

Ask me how I want my time
No answer of revenge oh my
Protect out there until love died
Hold to sigh breath of lies

Wonders of what unknown to me
Light one candle reflect to see
Warm of hard to melt alive
Smell of scent breath of high

Steam to show flicker to glow
Grief to hide push out to know
Bench of thought wash to clean
Showers to fall grow of green

Hands held back heart to rise
Journey to carry walk to stride
Circles to move perch to stop
Arms to wrap free the knots

How can I show what memories are real
The ones that hurt to hide and feel
To seek what’s there or nothing true
The times I hid from what I knew

I know I’m not well no cold or flu
My mind I know is sometimes blue
To know what’s there I see inside
The time I visited the house of fright

The games I played were they lies
I count the stairs to reach no light
My hands held out so small to big
Step by step not knowing to give

There  in the kitchen no food to cook
Your there again to take what took
To talk not knowing the unkind I blocked
Body in past to present of shock

Photo of you reflect back at me
Stare in your eyes blind to see
The friend you had memories you keep
Mine are so different the secret I weep

I’m sorry now for what I’m about to say
Not knowing back then my eyes took away
Love for you and him we’re no same
Split in two the divide that came

I say it from my heart and not my mind
The time back then when broken my kind
Look up to believe it’s me and not him
Always end down we’re the fear begins

Time has now passed to feel once again
The feelings no thoughts never become one
Battle no left the right to find a way
Be honest and true come what may

I knew I was different in so many ways
The grief cannot take that away 
The love we had will never be forgotten
My mind to live the special times
Fingers and thumbs they will still show
Memories  that we have cannot be taken
Good  the bad however we see them
Always there whenever it is cold

Roll of the dice that no one knows
Spin  of the wheel the answer will show
Winning  or losing will scatter our brains
Truth that lies may sorrow your woes.  
Look  inside and the answers will be there
Never knowing it was  under your nose.  

Who am I don’t really know
Believe  what you want be true to yourself
Time  and time will surely show.  
Outsiders will see what they want
Be kind be gentle friend or foe 
Free from the wolves and swing from the trees Stand in the rain to watch and grow

Find the rainbow the red pink and green
Follow  it until  the yellow begins.  
The answers maybe there to search again
Relive in your dreams your voice to sing
Gallop  in the wind no matter to  fall
Climb back on and be free with your wings.

If I voice you will you tell
If I know you will you show
If I see will you hear
The truth in me of fear

If I know will you believe
If I go will you be there
If I said what I see
The truth I want in me

If I thought will you think
If I bring will you take
If I trust will you hurt
The truth to heal the dirt

You wished the world did not repeat
I’m the one here now to sit in your seat
My little friend inside so cold
Taken away your  body forever told

You hurt you hid covers to wear
You thought that life was unfair
Surrendered to the devils cut
Numb to feel pit of dust

No fairy tales you had to reap
The fruit of apple give me to eat
Skip of time no rope you had
It’s me to help your music to beat

I’m here for you now split in two
To stutter your voice believe in you
Only one who understands
The misery the wounds sun of blue

Quirky rhyme it’s therapy time
Odd socks one two and three
Missing piece my drum that chimes
Notes that sing crazy mind

Scarecrow on fields to move the birds
Thoughts and feelings how absurd
Grass to smoke or shoot the gun
One to choose reach high for fun

Episodes will show at 430 meet
I send you mad to fall at your feet
Wine to drink after I’ve gone
There to sit with your ****

Roles reverse now I’m in the chair
How did I make you lose your hair
Was it the poems or the puppet show
Your safe now as  you taught me to know

No words I say to thank what you do
Stutter that I passed over to you
Wonderland of past no Alice your name
No tea to give only the hatter you became

Spinning around  button to stop
Winning and losing at no cost
Jackpot to show lift so high
Around again cost of sigh

Stop to press hands of sore
Going back for more and more
Flashes appear no silver or light
Give up to see eyes to the right

No more to spin reflection to see
Jumping of puddles ***** and deep
Last one there missed to fall
No drowning I tread tired to brawl

Mirror of pain look back at me
Gripping on to swing in the trees
Hands to ears no three monkeys to see
Reading back the words of free

I fight the words of inner voice
The truth I feel that shivers to move
The rays of sun no warmth to feel
Scared to tell the past of real

Hands around collar so stiff
Shake away the left and right
Flicker of lamp no saying goodnight
Back in black no snow of white

Movement of still invisible times
To know it happened bitter of lime
Your face is there no eyes to see
Memories held blank forever keep

Screech the fox prowls at dark
Legs to tremble runs so fast
Home to safe comfort to feel
Leaves to fall of times to steal

Sickness I thought inside my blood
No scars to see just mind to taught
Hidden so far no feelings of free
Little not seen ghost to haunt

Is it a life inside my head
My world my imagination that I fed
Is it real to touch outside
Not knowing my inner child

To dream so far of times went back
To search and speak the wall that cracks
Bent far down to take the breath
Release far out when times of death

Feathers in box of angels that keep
Eternity there looking so deep
Shutting away broken that locks
Back in time stop of the clock

Will you still love me when truth comes out
Will you still love me for what it’s about
Will you still love me forever I fight
Will you still love me this day and night

Will you still love me when I sat beside
Will you still love me when I tried to hide
Will you still love me for hurt on my eyes
Will you still love me when I tried to die

Will you still love me no hurt that I gave
Will you still love me when I mis behaved
Will you still love me now that your gone
Will you still love me forever that was wrong

You will still love me when  I scream of sad
You will  still love me the pain that was mad
You will still love me to live life so far
You will still love me the soul you are

Time to speak thoughts of mind
Hidden anger for depths of kind
Death of love scars inside
Stutter the words of tongue tied

Fighting is one story of life
One word to hear was eyes to hide
Memories that flash camera of light
Seeing believing was black and white

Awaken your soul to begin before
Struggle of journey repressed no more
Night of day will finally appear
There to show truth was always near

Ripples in the stream
No Feelings to understand
Hiding when you can
No smile to beam

Your body to be taken
From the little mind you had
Sweet silent child
Never making sound
Doors locked tight
No key to be found

Life standing still
No one to be
Only way is to hide
Lips closed tight
No journey to ride

Tears of eternity
One by one
Splashing to the ground
Puddles so deep
How life felt done

Years go by and by
Blackness was my light
To me to see to be
It’s my life to leave

Sorry it had to be this way
Sorry that you could not stay
Sorry that it had to be told
The life of me I had to unfold

Sorry that you were here no more
Sorry for the tears of no joy
Sorry I really wished you to stay
The life of me I would still hide today

Sorry I miss you so much
Sorry the arm you cannot touch
Sorry cannot hear you’re wisdom to taught
The life of me it was not my fault

Sorry I’m sorry I loved you so much
Sorry the words young I had no crutch
Sorry for the times i was no good child
The life of me thought in the wild

Sorry the word used no thought
Sorry we should of been taught
Sorry blame to be held hidden
The life of me would not have been ridden

Sorry this day had to come
Sorry in the chair I had to become
Sorry I had to voice to be well
The life of me releasing the hell

Dad no hurt that you did
Why oh why they gave me pain
No one like you lived so much
Trusted believes in life to touch

Hurt and pain they gave it to me
You didn’t in any life to gain
I know that if you were here
No pain would bring me to tears

My dad so gentle giving and true
They should of followed your boots
Hands so big but gentle in touch
My world loved so much

When you were there life was so true
In times I struggled when I was blue
No words you needed to hear you breath
Blanket was there for me to reach

Photos I look not remembering them all
Eyes to feel the safe and tall
Dad oh dad miss you so much
The good the bad now time to grieve

Here to lay still with silence
Freeze the hands ticking in time
Stop to press and watch to pause
Mend the hands rough in line

Moon so full in times that reflect
Stars so tiny wishing to all
Shooting to send to soar and try
The world around flash in the sky

Brushes stroke gently the flow
Colours mixed red yellow and blue
Blank to begin the gaps within
Pictures that hang hidden to show

Black the day that sun was broken
Locks of curls flow in the wind
Dress of white not worn to be spoken
Cut off when life was sinned

Sharp the silver soul to mortal
Tears no joy exist life’s years
Held the force pain of brutal
Piercing eyes sound that hears

Curled in ball no book of words
Fire no light no arms to wrap
Shiver of wood rot of  sword
Shadow of me was fear to sap

Lost in world of dissociation
Dreaming of things that forgotten
Visions I see no eye that meets
Wonders of world of defeat

Knocking back and forth
Count to 10 real world again
Voice to speak grown up times
Dream again of forgotten crime

Hands to head to hit so hard
Knock out the ring to hear the bells
Uncover the puzzle missing piece
Detach in time the life repeats

To live is to laugh
To laugh is to love
To love is to live
To see is to hear
To hear is to see
To touch is to smell
To smell is to touch
To be me is to be me
To fear is to not
To stand up tall is the lot

Who am I mind wanders to know
Not me not you who wears those clothes
Size up knowing what to do
Choice of what those colours show

Looking back white was black
Detached the house to show my woes
Written back for rhymes to show
Life just happened not really to know

Blank pages of crosswords to find
The time that healed forgotten mind
Word of games reveal to answer
Days too old to become wiser

I fear the fear with panick inside
I tremble I sweat with the breath on my life
The hand that leads me to no where
The silence the stillness that wasn’t quite right
You monster you devil that thing that’s inside
I really not sure what life was about
The truth be told I know your insight
No dreaming or imagining the real thing was at night

The pond the game I remember some things
The stairs that led me to were the nightmare begins
The blankness the freezing felt like Ice
From that  day I will remember you took my childlike life
My breathing is faster my neck feels tight
It’s time to loosen them muscles and say goodnight

Hide under the stones  with jaw locked tight
feel that this thing will never be right
Closed eyes clenched fists
Time to live for eyes to sight

My children my world I’m here to protect
to be free but will never neglect
here for you to guide and to be seen
to hear to feel the love in between
Go do what you need I will always be here
listen to care to heal for you all to be free
Pumping of my heart is the love I have
you are my chi my being that’s all I need
We may disagree and fight in the wild
all need to know that your never be alone
Stand tall be young  and believe who you are
As I never new that until life was so far
Time to mend so I can be there watching you grow from the cub that will roar
My love will always be there the highs the low
you are my world that I will never let go

Fear of fear who knows
Fear of fear life’s woes
Fear of fear sight shows
Fear of what burrows

Fear of fear nothing to seek
Fear of fear always to keep
Fear of fear life only  told
Fear of what becomes cold

Fear of fear living life
Fear of fear becomes rife
Fear of fear lightening strikes
Fear of what mind sights

Memories sleep one day to appear
Sun rise no shooting star
Night to come were lifetime to keep
Dimmed out not knowing back so far

Tightness to feel what memories fold
The terror of the night that left untold
Mouth to voice someone there
No cushion for comfort empty chair

Fantasy times or true life reveal
Times of grief there to unleash
Crippling inside feelings release
Missing word eternity peace

It’s me it’s me the one that begun
No brakes that work to find the fun
Fast as they turn  wind in my hair
Up and down the bumps to Care

It’s me it’s me we’re did I go
It all started off like not to know
Blank piece of wood to make it fun
Ride up and down life in the sun

It’s me it’s me the boots that I wore
Wheels that went round 
Little girl that soared 
Fun times we had so much more

It’s me it’s me on top of the hill 
Out of my way fast as I can 
Down and down wet in the rain
Hitting the bottom to climb once again 

It’s me it’s me here I am
Poems I rhyme loved the time 
Paintings I feel will start and dry
Heart to sing songs to mime

It’s me it’s me the stones I see
Throw them to hit one two or three
Jump in the square reveal what’s there 
Ten to reach win to glee 

It’s me it’s me I cannot stop
I want to feel good to enjoy the lot
Keep looking for words that will finally stay
It’s me it’s me my time to play