I fear the fear of losing control
I’m in pain and nowhere to go
I know I can beat this as I have done before
The feelings the shivers the tears no more

One day I will be back where I was
Little by little the stems will grow
My heart beating fast the sweat on my brow
This is when it’s time to slow

Listen to your feelings one by one
take them gently as they come
the butterflies will fight inside their hole
let them flutter one by one

Don’t fight anymore just let it be
Hands wide reach to the sky
Stars they shine and twinkle at night
Open your eyes and you will fight

Run as fast ribbon to end
Time and time stop to mend
How life will be free
never catch up just swing in the trees

Holding back pushing tight
In and out rhythm of breath
Warm inside cold outside
Shadows of light

Faces on trees
Cracks to see
Running wild
Crisp of  leaves

Beauty of nature
Winding path
Green and brown
Up and down

Boots of mud
Still those thoughts
Ears for sound
Deep in ground

Lost no more
Branches in fall
Bridge over stream
Ripples and all

Unlock the key
Open your heart
No treasure to find
Emptiness of mind

Faces we see unknown that meets
Stories told fairy or life
Tales she tells back in time
Spoken words repeat like mine

Dying she was lines not to show
Mind of a child that still grows
Journey of life to teach to me
Help rid of the fear for eternity

Smile that was given started to voice
Stretch to reach the top of the shelf
Spirits that past there to stop
Fate was there to untie my knots

The day will come that I won’t fear
Not now, not yet, but near
Believing is hidden hurt
Blank mind no words to work

Black is written in the rhymes
Reading back, time and time
Fighting against the storm so strong
Life to relive so wrong

Heart knew what was broken
The angel in me to be taken
Years go on not to know
Where the fear began to grow

Green of ocean hidden so far
Waves in storm torn apart
Lightening of silver black to grey
Water In pebbles washing away
Desert of pain

Deep in the sand sun to reflect
No bucket or ***** kingdom no more
Bury me under head so far
Stones to feel to bore

One by one yours to pick
Big or small make same  noise
Hands so rough smooth bounce more
Strength to find throw those sores

Treading in water no jacket to save
Guard to find make your way
Blind of rays
Life to stay

So many thoughts come from one word
The hurt the pain it feels so raw
Sun will set when terror begins
Not knowing when sunrise sings

Hurt will burn the blackness to grow
Stirring the mind that’s trodden down
Coldness scrapes  to get through these times
My life held in not knowing the crime

Broken butterfly was once white and pure
Watching and waiting a lifetime to appear
Killing inside the love not to know
Surrender those wings and find how to glow

gold and silver held  in my hands
treasure that was given no place in my heart
Hardest of times that we’re learned
End of the rainbow was a hug I so yearned

Who am I do I know
Heart to pump for sound to find
flow of blood through your veins
Your Soul to show

Waterfall of rain feeling free
Lightness of body to release
Splash of water from hands that wet
Wake up little mind to see

Spirits I feel to be true
Holding back is way to be
Pushing through trying hard
To be me is a ride so far

Wishing well hidden so deep
Pennies to throw
Never to be found
Search  inside you is one way to grow

Tug of war is one of the games
Pulling and pushing stuck in mud
Let go of the rope
Live in hope

Look inside to finally find
Truth and love is what you are
Clench of fists holding tight
You my friend was missed by light