It is the darkest, deepest place one can travel to alone,
A solo journey filled with struggles and groans.
Every day is a new battle against the same foe,
But the enemy fights back with psychological blows.
It creeps up on you in your most vulnerable state,
Especially when there's no one around who can relate.
Thoughts in your mind begin to swirl and swell,
Which drag you into your own subconscious hell.
Figments and entities from your past
Serve as the pain, which you can't outlast.
Finally sleep always comes as a welcomed friend,
But it the morning the ceaseless battle begins yet again.

No one told me about this pain.
Everything hurts,even my pride.
It's these emotions I am forced to contain.

Tears has fallen from my eyes like a steady rain.
Nothing can take back these nights I've cried.
No one told me about this pain.

My feelings I can not even explain.
To you, my heart was open wide.
It's these emotions I am forced to contain.

I'm at the where i feel not but shame
Because I thought you were going to be my guide.
No one told me about this pain.

With you is where I wanted to remain.
Now i have to continue on with a long stride,
It's these emotions i am forced to contain.

Please tell me our relationship was not in vain.
I hope to not regret having tried.
No one told me about this pain.
It's these emotions I  am forced to contain.

If I showed my  true colors,what would society think?
Would they laugh,show pity,or read the ink?
I am exhausted from smiling every single day
When i know the pain won't  go away.
Every night i cannot sleep
Because my thoughts run so deep.
They went for a stroll
But got ****** into a black hole.
My focus is no longer there,anymore
I don't know why I am like this, I swear.

Why Me?
Why did you choose me?
You choose me then you hurt me
You said you would be there form me
Which was another one of your lies?
Why me?

Why did you choose some one that you could stab in the back?
I thought you were going to be there for me
You said you knew what is was going through
So why aren't you helping me anymore?

Why did you choose to help me?
When you really don't care now!!
You threw me away like I was garbage
Why me?
Why did you do this to me?

I don't understand you anymore
You have changed and don't care what's going on
Why did you choose to help me?
Really? Why me?

You said you understood what was going on
You really hurt me big brother
You promised me that you would help me
You couldn't even keep your promise
Why me?
Why did you do this to me?

Why me God? Why is my life so filled with tears?
Does he have to hit? what has he to gain?
as he rips my clothes-Do you feel my pain?

Why me God? why can't my mother hear my cries?
When I scream her name-does she have a choice?
When I cry in the night-in a small child's voice.

Why me God?  Why is it I have to carry this load?
Did I do something wrong? Is is something I've said?
Am I just a mistake? AM i BETTER OFF DEAD?

AND WHY O GOD-  couldn't I have a normal life?
Did you give ME eyes- to watch OTHER kids play?
To see the joy on THEIR faces- day after day?

And why O God- couldn't you give me understanding?
Is there a lesson to learn? Or is it too much to ask?
Will I smile someday? Will it be my Last?

BECAUSE GOD...IF YOU'LL JUST TELL ME WHY!
IF YOU'LL JUST SHOW ME THE WAY..

Then maybe I can feel worthy-  in some small way

It's hard sometimes to say exactly what I'm worth.
Sometimes even harder dealing with the hurt.

To feel like no one's there during all my pain.
I have nothing left to lose and nothing left to gain.

I struggle through the days, with no one at my side,
To find some sort of worth, to save a little pride.

But all my days are dark, stormy, cold and gray,
And emptiness keeps growing as I slowly fade away.

I have no effort left to put into this life,
No helping hand behind me to pull me to the light.

So once again I ask, before I leave this Earth,
Tell me, if you care, exactly what I'm worth.