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kromwellfarkus Feb 2019
This brittle heart I was given
Covered in glue and silicon
Bandages and sticky tape
Barely beats nowadays.

So easily hurt, damaged and bruised
So easily deceived, ***** and used
My outer is strong, focused and clean
Yet, my inner is lost in a weak mans dream.

You ask for help, I give it
You ask for monetary unit
You demand my love, but give back only angst
And I fall in a heap, despite all my strength.

I close my eyes, amidst conversation
And you see this as a misunderstanding
I am just gathering my wits, can't you see?
It's hard to think, with a head full of sea.

I try to get my point across
But you rant and rave and get cross
I swallow my pride and words
Just to appease your requirements.

So, here I am, on my own, with you all
Loving my life, yet hating it all
You don't care if I fall
As long as I pay every toll.

Well, *******, and your fickle ways
I have one last breath, just for you
As I flip the bird and walk out the door
You will see, only then, what you've lost.

This brittle heart is all I have
It still beats, it still does its thing
When I recieve your apology text
I'll try my best, not to reply.
kromwellfarkus Jan 2019
The anticipation
Before her kiss
Is a lump in my throat
Of a half swallowed fist.

She can can be so mean
She can be so sweet
I feel like I'm winning
I feel like I forfeit.

I try so hard
To appease her needs
But I am just a mere male
Dealing with my own ****.

I am so selfish
I am so needy
All I want
Is for her to want me.

I take her on adventures
I buy her awesome things
I make her laugh, I make her ******
I love her more than I care to imagine.

I do her dishes
I cook her meals
I read her poetry
I pay her bills.

I work so hard
At work and at home
I give my time to my children
So she has time on her own.

She gives me angst
She breaks my heart
But, I am a man
So, I must keep it to myself.

I choose her
I choose this
I choose the anticipation
Before her kiss.
kromwellfarkus Dec 2018
Just gimme a minute,
I don't get it,
What the ****
Are you talking about.

Echoes in my brain cave,
Tearing tender flesh,
Your poison tone
Drops an eyelid in quiver.

Blink hard twice or thrice,
Just to regain focus,
I am the harvest,
And they are the locust.

Lost during conversation,
Dreaming between scenarios,
Just so's youse knows,
Mum's the word (tap the nose).

What the ****
Was I talking about?
I don't get it,
Just gimme a minute.
kromwellfarkus Dec 2018
Let
Before I allowed
The world to break me,
I was stronger, keen and able

Now, incoherent and disabled.

The dream was just a fable,
Just put food on the table,
Alone, reminisce and ramble...

To the breeze, I mumble.

Another ale to soothe the blues,
Another cone to poke the bruise,
Another cigarette to calm the nerves,
Another circle to dance within.

Now, incoherent and disabled,
I was stronger, keen and able,

Before I allowed,
The world to break me.
kromwellfarkus Dec 2018
Haikus are stupid,
And sometimes, they don't make sense...
Refrigerator.
Word.
kromwellfarkus Dec 2018
All my meals come from cans,
Fire produced for heat and light,
Dirt carpet, trees for walls,
My ceiling is painted sky.

We amble through chatter,
One-liners, quick banter,
Once I hear silence and breeze,
It doesn't seem to matter.

My lounge suite is an old chair,
Covered in ash, stinking of beer,
Brought from home, now a part of me,
And part of my home that I brought with me.

With left leg sprawled where my arm should be,
And my back angled in such a way,
Head tilted on the edge of the back rest,
This is exactly where I should be.

As the sun sets and the sky does its thing,
All the wildlife around sings its goodnight hymn,
We cheers and rejoice, me and thoughts,
And the apprentice, across from the fire pit.

An angry, empty belly quivers and roars,
It's time to feed the beast within,
All my meals come from cans,
But, I forgot my can-opener.
I work away a lot, we often camp, swags usually. Disconnecting is the best way to reconnect.

Good times.
kromwellfarkus Dec 2018
Its been a few months now
I've been home
She asked if we could make it work
I ensured her, we could.

At the beginning
It was all love
All ***, all muscle
All flex.

Routine arrives
Raises its brow
Settles, as dust
Covered in rust.

Familiar nuance
Dishes and dinner
Laughter and mayhem
Lego fidget spinner.

I go to work
They go to school
She folds my clothes
I'm unsure of where they go.

This ghost tints
No longer invisible
Our photos sit proudly
Upon window sill.

We have grown through distance
Strengthened from afar
I have what I've always had
I just never knew what it was.

It's family
It's love
It is all
The above.
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