a flower
in a garden

summer
blooms

nothing
has ever

been this
soft

and fragrant
the bee

that feeds
off her

is happy
to be alive

for its
short life

feeling
fulfilled

yes she said
I know

sometimes
I like to

bury myself
in blue

is this a deal
breaker

for you
I hope not

I hope you
understand

I need these
blue days

so I

don’t cover
myself in

red

the smell
of sweat

lingers

like a
panther

extinguishing
light

penetrating
night

another
victim­

succumbs
to desire

the deadly
sweet

the ever
lasting

there are
no drugs

strong as
this addiction

I spread
so quickly

creating a disease
in too many

of you

the cure
for me

is known

has been known
for years

slow down and
question me

before you share
me with someone

else

but you can’t
help yourself

I am so juicy

white gold
sun drops

surround
her thoughts

a halo of
hope

for the water

she hears
the whispers

in the trees
and she

dances to
their songs

like a
skipped rock

creating waves

she releases
thin strands

of auburn
from their tail

as

she collapses
in her

flower bed

lines and curves

the distance
between points

I trace slowly

with my fingers
and my mind

touching all parts
equally

I want to reach
long term memory

so this becomes
part of me

as necessary
as my lungs

and my heart

I have his picture
postcard

on my refrigerator

a bit creepy
his picture

and maybe having
it there

black and white
troubled face

a frown

long forehead
big bowtie

deep set
piercing eyes

it’s just I
owe him

learned so much
from him

how to express
myself

learned it is okay
to be dark

sometimes

each star is
a letter

we look up
at the same

time in our
different

places and
create words

we name
each other

describing
all our

different parts
and how

they connect
or how we

want them
to connect

I wiped my
mind clean

erased all
the excess

all the things
that no longer

have meaning
to me

it’s so easy
to let things

linger and
build up

let them
weigh me down

so last night

I wiped my
mind clean

of everything
that means

nothing to me

he swims
in chaos

he breathes
in confusion

his mind is
disorganized

his mouth
is rabid

spreading
his dis-ease

throughout these
dis-united

states

certainty is a necessary evil.

it helps us act.
but it is not real.

or true.

because you.
are certain.

it is true.
because.

it is true.

always be careful.
around those who.

are certain.

you were
number 2

and never
wanted to

be number 1
you were

the perfect
shape for

my hand

the perfect
color for

my eyes

my perfect
day was

when you
were sharp

and didn’t
break

god I
miss you

I am a child
of the fields

not the oceans
or the seas

not the forests
or the leaves

not the desert
or the sun

I am a child
of the weeds

wild flowers
and buzzing bees

high grass and
fast grasshoppers

ladybugs and
lightning bugs

I am a child
of the fields

unkempt
beautiful and
free

I fall through glass.  looking.  a mirror.  an image.  I am cut into pieces.  small versions of me.  scatter.  across the planet.  I cannot follow.  everyone.  so I sleep.  after all.  

I am tired.

I wake to a whisper.  she is the wise widow of the wind.  she smiles at me.  lasciviously.  she tells me secrets.  I listen.  sneaking peaks.  at her mystery.

I grow.  large.  I put the beautiful planet.  in my pocket.  for safe keeping.  the oceans drain.  I have a stain.  I can’t explain.

who would believe me.  anyway.

never the angel
she escaped

Schrodinger’s box
she was alive

and we all knew it
we wanted

to live life
like her

outside the box
and if we died

living like her
we wanted

everyone to
know it

the politician
speaks

twists
words
clumsily

not like
a poet

he does
not

see their
beauty

he does
not

feel how
sensitive

they are
they cry

each time
he opens

his mouth

they die
each time

he speaks

in the land
of misfits

we speak
in code

travel on
waves in

the sky
asking

questions
that unsettle

the nature
of things

we close
our eyes

so they
can’t see us

but they
feel our

impact they
try to

understand us
define us

by the changes
we cause

the boy had visions

he saw patterns
small and large

he made meanings

combining many
things in many

ways

he never tried
he just did

he spoke words
as if a spell

no one could
follow him

they knew he
knew more

they just didn’t
know what it was

he knew

the world was
bigger than here

but everyone he
knew was here

so he had to
leave here and

he had to leave
it now

you did not mean
what you said

your words were
caged monsters

escaping from
your mouth

you did not
know their form

they were mutations
of what you

meant to say
they had these

small sharp teeth
that cut me in

so many places
you still can’t see

I am bleeding inside

I am afraid I
will never heal

I am losing

shedding or peeling
snake or an onion

my thoughts
carve away

another layer
of myself

going deeper
into something

I call myself

all these sediments
all these past lives

how many layers
must I lose

until I can see
the eye

or will I just
disappear

the next morning
I was walking
through a field
of wild flowers
the air alive with
natural perfumes
birds and bees
were feeding
my naked feet
felt no fear
there was no path
to follow or
to trace
and I wasn’t
looking for one
I was alive
and that
meant something

I’m sorry
trump family

I live in a
democracy

I do not need
an enemy

another side
is like a coin

which does
not exist

without
another side

conflict is
the path to

truth

we are all
simple
creatures

with biased
beliefs

needing to be
challenged

to understand
ourselves

I do not love
like the angels

where everything
is white

and we all
have wings

to escape
when things

go bad

I do not live
in the sterile

world where
everyone is clean

and pain takes
her pills

to sleep soundly

I live on the
outside where

lines are always
crossed

and the picture
is never quite

complete

the day is
nearly here

I will have
to leave

my cocoon
but I am not

yet a butterfly
I do not

think I can
be safe

I have a mask

but I do not
have my

wings

she talked to you
and you mattered

at first it wasn’t much
casual words she

may have said to others

but you could see her
eyes were open

they could take in
more than the others

it didn’t take long
for you to let her in

she entered your mind
she felt your scars

and she wasn’t scared
but you were

you pushed her out
before she could reach

the spot

means something
to us now living

in our isolation
to me as a child

it was lessons
taught to me

from a
child’s show

on TV

some followed
the street or

the electric
company

but me I
always wanted to

zooma zooma
zooma… zoom

the first sound
is pure

it gives life
to the soul

it has no shape
and makes no

sense

like the universe
it is pre-human

it does not need
to be understood

to exist

I wish I was
the first sound

what happened in

the smoke-filled room
at the edge of town

ravens sit on old wires
and wait

sparks flicker beneath them
but they don’t move

tires squeal and dirt flies
small rocks hit

metal and glass

enough to be heard
and felt

but not enough to break

when the dust settles
it is quiet

the birds eventually leave
and the lights come on

automatically

I have collected
all the pieces

sewed them
back together

I can almost
tell what it was

it beats
sends blood

to most places
but it doesn’t

feel the same
something is

missing

something that
was bigger than

its parts

not the news
people

the art band
from the last

century

make me think
make me dance

at the same time
is that legal

in this century
is it the same

as it ever was

I remember

when I first
learned to smell

she walked by
my office

and

smiled in a
friendly way

leaving her trace

a lingering

like fragrant smoke
or a snake

that entered
me olfactorily

I learned later
why she remained

so long

she smelled
of eternity

happiness is
a butterfly

it lands on
us from

time to time
live in its

beauty and
peace

when it
chooses you

and grant
it the freedom

to leave
when it

is time
don’t worry

your time
will come

again

I break myself
in half

to find the pit
the *******

that holds the
soft parts

together I want
to remove it

I want to destroy it

I don’t want
to be whole

I want to be
a juicy mess

that drips
off chins

and stains
everything

the days changed
subtly

and then one day it
was different

not one thing
everything was

different

as if time
separated

and I was imbalanced

and I fell into
one of the cracks

and in the crack
there was no flower

to pick

nothing to hold
onto

and I landed in
a bed with

the humans in white
asking me if I was real

and then

one day out of
nowhere

I forgot to think

it was so beautiful
that day

lost in the
crazy vein

is a magic
carpet ride

to desire
succumb

to the
succubus

she stares
into the void

seeing her
beautiful
reflection

wink at her

hearing her
voice sing

that song
she loves

I imagine you
are love

a time before
the rotting

of the garden

a time before
knowing

a time before

need
want
hunger
desire
fire
pain
stain
passion
obsession­

and loss

when there
was life

but no
reason

to live

you overlook me
I fade away

not into the memory
into the never noticed

I want to be hated
by someone

I want to matter that much

haven’t been
to church

in a long while
not much I miss

but one thing is
the hymns

sung by the
truly truly faithful

not much of
them but

when you hear them
when you see them

sing

it is truly spiritual

if I could hear
every sound

I would pick up
your whispers

and your sighs
and hold them

like beautiful
flowers ignoring

everything else
in nature

knowing nothing
else is beautiful

to me

I am curled
into a ball
holding myself
together
trying to
squeeze
from me
the poison
past if
I squeeze
hard enough
maybe I
will become
a hydrogen
bomb
and implode
obliterating
this memory

you can have
what is left

did we give
you enough

of the world
to build the

next iteration
can you

generate another
generation

be not simple
say not what

you mean

so on her toes
she will remain

not knowing
who you are

not knowing
what you want

you cannot be
understood

so that you mean
nothing to her

the laboratory
is free

mingling
mixtures
multiply

explosions
are neutral

creations
have many
forms

sides are
not taken

and

messes are
the norm

and everyday

we are new
as we are

her thoughts
sink to the bottom

where men cannot
breathe

where light cannot
reach

they become those
strange creatures

that swim alone
and glow in the dark

the machines have stopped
the music can be heard

but don’t dance today

ballerina
the air can’t hold you

without all its pollution
it has lost its weight

neck stretched
to see

elongated
is one of
my favorite
words

curves hold
your tilted

head

are you
thinking

about
someone

or something

I hope it is
something

or me

abstractions are chemicals

be careful when you
use them

they can be explosive
and only use them

if they are necessary
and if you

understand and can explain
the ingredients

their chemical composition

otherwise spend the
time learning them

before you express
them to others

and like scientists
engage in peer review

before you use them

make sure others
challenge you

to make your
points stronger

or leave it to
the professionals

which isn’t you
if you can’t clearly

explain yourself
or can’t handle being

challenged

I turned off
everything

on the outside
sound and light

creating dark silence

the shadows
slow danced

teasing

first alone then
together

they have
mystic rhythm

without sight
or sound

casting spells
inside of me

my mind starts
to whisper

all its voices
in unison

a choir

reminding me
of those things

I tried to forget

you gave into the
slow strangulation

of blood

passed from one
to the other

family is fate
seeds crack

and spread disease
one man after

another falls
look into the mirror

see the past
play the game

tag you’re it

on the first day
we breathe
fresh air

our minds
come to life

we sense the
movement of
small things

inside and out
the connecting

of two neurons
the twitch of

an ant’s leg
before it moves

it is like the
beginning of

love when

we drop our
heavy weights

and hold hands