you did not mean
what you said

your words were
caged monsters

escaping from
your mouth

you did not
know their form

they were mutations
of what you

meant to say
they had these

small sharp teeth
that cut me in

so many places
you still can’t see

I am bleeding inside

I am afraid I
will never heal

you paint
beyond your

place and
time

reaching into
souls you will

never meet
making us see

more than ourselves
more in ourselves

is that what
it means to

be eternal

I am simple
an idiot

like Dostoyevsky
described

straightforward
you cannot

understand me
I am outside

your scope
and scale

I do not want
from you or

to be you

I do not absorb
your threats

or insults
I am immune

to your world
I know

you want me
you know

I can’t be

power is the root
money is that which

flows through it
poison not water

the desire it spreads
grows exponentially

it has a smell
that gets into

your skin

rub all you want
once it’s there

you can’t get it out
it is a tattoo

on your soul
marking you

you might get
what you want

but you’ll never
get what you need

I cannot sleep

tonight
there is something

out there for me
something more

than this
I can hear its

voice when I
close my eyes

it is deep
like a well

wishing me well

something in the
sky wants me

I heard the

god Jupiter
is bright

tonight

each day

a colorful
array

laid out

one after
the other

with
scientific
names

I can’t
remember

each day

a colorful
array

I swallow

one after
the other

if I remember

I like a
little with

my music

I hate it
with my

information