I’m at the cash register
Picking up a to go order
Making small talk with the hostess
Suddenly I hear your voice
Close enough to touch

You had to hear me but you do not turn
I look at you not looking at me
I make the leap

“Hi. Good to see you. Meet my friend.
Hope you are doing well. Take care.”
What goes unsaid says far too much.

You the independent one
Wanting someone only to enhance you
Needing no one to complete you

Me, with my holes to fill
Fill with someone like me,
Someone who needs me just as much

I pay the price, take the food, walk away
Unsteady on this new ground
Born in the earthquake of our meeting again


Each morning commute  
Every black car met
Makes false promises of your return

No sacrilege is love
That dies but yet remains
To nurture what’s to come

There is a boy inside of me
A most mischievous child
Who hurts his love, but most himself
He keeps the romance wild

He dwells in a land of absolutes
“She loves me loves me not”
All or nothing, life or death
A terrible game for a tot

His highs so high, his lows so low
Ecstasy and despair
Yet he’d not trade those two extremes
Less feeling for less fear

Because less fear would also mean
Less feeling of the highs
He hates but holds the horrors
That his heart might hold your sighs

He’s unsophisticated
Unsure ***** unwashed
His love’s too simply stated  
But he loves unabashed

This bearded one who watches him
Knows compromise is real
Yet in his heart he wishes he
Could feel that trembling still

And so they go hand in hand
A most unlikely pair
Their three legged race a funny farce
Still makes you shed a tear

How can this work? How can it last?
These two extremes in one
Can child be father to the man
Man child to the son?

Keep the passions of the youth
To melt with fiery fusion?
Keep too the crone’s wisdom, truth
To know hell’s an illusion?

Who shall win this battle?
Which one shall remain?
A young child’s fire, an old man’s peace?
Must there be loss to gain?

Perhaps there is an answer
That does not end in pain
That marries well the best of both
Convergence of the twain

All this struggle that you see
That is so hard and painful
Is these two Jacobs becoming free
By wrestling each his angel

You were a rough and tumble love
And I so want that kind
The honest real encounter
Not the love that’s blind

The love that sees and seizes
Savors ***** and screams
Howls of joy and sorrow
Pleasure mixed with pain

A love as real as rabbit
A love as deep as mirrors
Reflecting all infinity
Laughing at the terrors

At first it was delightful
Your water was my home
You buoyed me up and held me
We each begged each to come

We zipped it down, we looped the loop
We never left the house
We played what if, we played why not
We talked of being spouse

But as it grew more serious
The stakes began to rise
And I could not leave easily
I'd looked into your eyes

I was *** committed
I was in for all
It was far too late to jump
Far too far to fall

We swam in your water’s depths
Farther from the shore
I did not care for you were there
To hold me up and more

But when you ducked beneath the waves
I turned and you were gone
I knew I was over my head
And sank just like a stone

I woke again with your scent on my skin
And lay there wanting
Nothing to change

No shower yet
Just coffee and cream
And the dogs on the deck

And that perfect stillness
The angled sun
The quiet of the woods

The color of the trees
The smell of the leaves rotting on the ground
And mushrooms and you

The bright blue sky
With one little cloud
The silence deafens my soul out loud

I sit here on the couch
And listen to her voice as she converses through the ether
I do not know what is discussed
From my one side of the conversation
But I know her voice is beautiful and caring and kind

I am here at her house
Just being domestic
Each of us doing our own thing
Yet knowing the other is there if needed

The room is quiet now
The fan revolves
The refrigerator hums
The light from the window is dim

There is a peace in knowing
That I am allowed to be here
Even though there is no reason
No purpose to my presence
Except my presence

Our love is coalescing
Becoming firm and stable
Less wobbles now
Less danger of a fall

But it will always bear watching
Will always need attendance
So I shall try to do that
Be the tender of the tender

Where is all this going?
When will all this end?
I have no way of knowing
But I have found the Friend

Keep your options open
Keep your self apart
Clear out the reminders
Never tie your heart

But I could never follow
Your truly sage advice
I'd rather feel the feelings
Though one must pay the price

And though the speech was spoken
And though we have last kissed
And though the door has closed
Leather still binds my wrist

And though Xoxo is banished
And though you learn the bass
I still look at your picture
Maori on your face

And though the cost of loving us  
Was more than we were able
And though there is no fairy dust
Your bowl will grace my table

And though the first half gain
And second half was loss
Despite that wrong direction
I still lean when I floss

Though we talked without our hearts
And only with our head
Though I left not crying  
Your smile still warms my bed

And though you do not tiptoe
So hearts are breast to breast
Though you say valediction  
Your compass claims my desk

And though our love was lust  
And though I am a mess
A balloon hides in my closet
And I am truly blessed

She was by here earlier today
Flirting with my wild imagination
Revealing lines and stanzas
The way you casually drop
Your clothes upon the floor

I yearned to pick them up
Preserve them with ink and paper
Or little bytes flashing on a screen
But I was busy
Doing more important things
So it seemed at the time

I should have remembered
That these gifts of poem pieces
Are more perishable
Than an overripe peach
And disappear more quickly
Than flakes of snow on warm earth