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Napolis May 2019
(7/1/2010)

Yesterday

morning

I found my

daughter.

she had

been  lost

for five

years..



and three

grandkids

later.



I finally

called her,

the moment

stopped

me dead

in my tracks..



I thought

how did

we ever

get to here.



in a million years

I could not

retrace

my steps.



but then in

a moment

of truth.

I abandoned

my foolish

pride.



and she

let me

walk back

into her

life,



and inside

a piece of me

felt whole

again.



scared over

but healed.



she had

been

the one

much wiser

than me,



the keeper

of the door

held open,



vigilant

waiting

for her

adolescent

father,



to finally

find  his

way home.
Napolis May 2019
6/12/2008



Last week

seven of my

children were

all together for

the first time

in along

time,

.

and as

each one

came into

the room

to greet me.

I felt my roots

grow

deeper and

deeper to

the center

of the

universe.,



and in

their smile

I saw the

smile of

my father,

the smile

of my

mother.,



and as

I drank

in their

laughter

I became

drunk with

life.



and when

night fell

I looked up to

the heavens

took a deep

breath into

my soul.



then I

memorized

every star

and shimmer.

up above

my head,



and I knew

and I

was certain



I had finally

found my

place in

the universe.
Napolis May 2019
You would always

sit in your

baby carrier

with an odd

little tilt

of your

head,



and I would sit

across from you

and tilt my head

in return,



and even

though you

were a baby

you would

laugh and I

swear you

would get

our little

inside joke.



and as you

grew the

neck tilt

would stop

but I would

look for it

over and over

again,



but as you

grew older,

your sense of

humor grew

and it wouldn't

be long

until you were

the center of

everyone's

attention.



and your

laughter would

pour over us

and your words

would be

funny and kind,,



and I knew

you had the gift

of laughter

from my father,



and though

he passed

many years before

you were

born,



i can still

hear him

in your voice

in your laughter

I see him

in your eyes

at night.



they light up

a room they

light me and

your mother's

heart,



to know

that the

memory of

your little head



would be

forever tilted

in our

hearts to

hold.
Napolis May 2019
(for Noah when he was

5 years old)



Child angel

resting

on a pillow

of clouds.



Head of hair

three weeks

overdue

from the

barber's

chair.



spiderman pajamas

keeping

your dreams

toasty

against the

midnight air.,



your mother

and  I lying

next to

you as you

sleep.



only five

years old.

and you

have made

every

dream in our

lives come

true.



slumber well

our son.

slumber deep.



under this

harvest moon



our dreams

you keep.
Napolis May 2019
Summer
The curtains are still
A distant train is muted
Soles against the wall

a tyrants reign has
finally come
to and end,

a poet tear
bleeds deep
inside your
heart then
dries inside
your soul.

runaway sorrow
vanishes from
view beyond
the horizon
line..

and all I
can do
now is simply
stand
in front of
you ...

and say

hello...
Napolis May 2019
The rain rolls off roofs

I see your blur
down the hall
Words die
on my lips

last night
hangs upon
my body like a
mist of
stale sweat
and circumstance.

love was never
something to
navigate our
feelings,

emptiness was
just a need that
had to be filled.

and as you
wipe me
from between
your legs and
mouth...

I can feel
what little
love I had
left for you
in my heart

begin to
runaway like
a mongrel
dog crying..

to hell perhaps..

it seems like
a much
better place
than here.....
Napolis May 2019
Your mother

and I

stood

on

the exit

steps of

Kaiser hospital

in Hollywood

the day

after you

were born.


The nurse

handed us

some brochures

and said

she wished

us all

of the best,

and that

you were

one of the

most beautiful

babies that

she had

ever seen.


your mom

and I

just looked

at each other

wondering why

no one was

coming

home with us

to help us

raise you

until you

were at least

18 or so.


The morning dawn

was just coming

up over the

hills and I

knew our

lives would

never be

the same,


and that

I would

try with

all of my might

to be a good

father for you,


but deep inside

I was thinking

what in

the world

am I

suppose to

do with

you now.


so for

the next 30

or so years

we tried

our best and

gave you

all of our love

and all

the ounces of

our wisdom.


and you

have given me

more than

I ever thought

possible for

a daughter

to give her

father.


and to have

the honor of

raising you

through the

years


in my life

that has

made all

of the difference

in the world.
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