Smile
she said to me
before
she ran away

How
I ask myself
before
I follow her

how are you
he asks
looking at her
with concern

I am struggling
she answers
trying to find
the right path

I can see
how hard you try
to hurt me

I can also see
that trying to hurt me
hurts you more
than it hurts me

Why don’t you just stop...

We moved with ease in hyper reality  
Laughing and joking with each other
And feeling light and comfortable
When gently pushing out the boundaries
Into a new world previously unknown to us
With every conversation our hopes and desires increased
Until we made the move into reality

I sing
I dance
I smile

I dream
I hope
I try

what does it mean
when a man says
I love you
the little girl asks

it is meaningless
her mother replies

you need to set
impossible goals
if you want to be
a successful poet
he advised

she looks at him
confused
as she finds it
impossible to do
what he suggests

I look at her
and realize
that she cannot decide
when it is appropriate
to stop supporting others
and begin supporting herself

they say:
you are what you read

I must be a hopeless romantic

she woke up
in the middle
of the night
and realized
that she had
to leave him
if she wanted
to regain
her untroubled self

I am angry and annoyed
As I have finally understood
That my own weakness
Had made it possible
For others to hurt me

At the same time
I am happy and delighted
As I have also understood
That my newly gained strength
Makes it possible
For others to love me

tick - tack - tock
I listen to the clock

tick - tack - tock
I listen to the clock

I want to listen to your voice
and not listen to the clock

tick - tack - tock
I listen to the clock

tick - tack - tock
I listen to the clock

I like islands as
they let me escape
from the drudgery
of everyday life.
Once I land on an island
I cut off the rope
that secured my boat.
Then I open
my arms and heart widely
allowing freedom to replace
repression and fear.
After a while I am me again
and ready to take on
the impossible.
Then it is time
to take my mobile
out of my bag and check
my text messages.

I am longing to be loved
But you seem to hate me

I am dreaming of tenderness
But all you can give is pain

I want you to smile at me
But you just turn away

I think I am not the right woman for you

she looked
at me
with joy
knowing
that she
had finally
become
invincible

what is it like
passionately kissing him
she wonders
and longingly looks
at his lips
is it like eating
ice cream at midnight
or more like accidentally biting
on a jalapeño pepper

knit knit purl knit
her needles clink
her fingers race
knit knit purl knit
no time to think
she found her pace
knit knit purl knit

You say things to me
that nobody has said before
your words are different
and make me think
your narratives meander
through my heart
they touch my soul
they make me smile
and yet I know
that you will hurt me

why do you
attach
all these labels
to me?

foreign
middle-aged
cis
childless
divorced
heterosexual
jobless­
dreamer

is it to conveniently
exclude or include me
whenever it suits you?

it is late
and I cannot sleep

I thus decide
to stay awake
and not to worry
that it is late

late at night
and cold
sitting up in bed
awake
loud and doubtful
thoughts

you have to listen
she says
patiently listen
and then
you will learn

I am leaving you
he says

She looks at him
and smiles

You always said
That I could not write
But now that you have left me
My words are flowing

run
run
don’t miss
the train

smile
smile
forget
the pain

red light
green light
blue light

yellow light
orange light
white light

my favorite light:
moonlight

I want to live
in a real castle
I want to drive
a big and fast car
I want to eat
chocolate all day
I want a prince
to kiss me
and make me his princess
the little girl seighs
closes her eyes
and falls asleep

She screams at me:
You are such an egoist!
You are not thinking of others
and their feelings!
You are disappointing us all!
We did not expect this from you!
I now need to protect my family.
Do not come to visit us.

I wonder what I have done
to get so severely punished?

Maybe it was my decision
no longer to follow
other people’s expectations
and to finally live my own life.

pollution
noise
traffic
cranes
frantic
chaotic
*****
vibrant
humm­ing and buzzing
but turn a corner
and you are greeted by
serene squares
with small parks
and stone benches
inviting you
to sit down and relax
and connect with those
who have been here
centuries ago

When I look into the mirror
I see a woman
I do not know.
I try to understand her.
What makes her happy
and what makes her sad?
I would like to know
her dreams and her desires,
her secret hopes for
a life full of joy and love.
What are her plans?
Does she have any plans?
She is a stranger
shrouded in mystery.
I wonder if I will ever
understand her.

You were everything to me
my past my present and my future
my joy and my happiness
my hope and my desire
my belief
that life was worthwhile living

And then you left me

she is so lost
she is so lost
she cries all day
she lost her soul

When you say
you love me
does it mean the same
as when I say
I love you

I am having
The biggest love affair
Of my life

One that makes
My heart leap
And my soul dance

I am in love
With myself

when she looks into the mirror
she sees his longing brown eyes
and his black hair she would like to touch
his smile is magical and captures her imagination

she closes her eyes to sense his presence

when she looks into the mirror again
she sees her longing green eyes
and her brown hair she would like him to touch
her smile is magical but he cannot see it

come with me
he says

why should I
she asks

one sheep
many sheep
finally sleep

Hush hush
sleep my little boy
Hush hush
you are my great joy
Hush hush
I guard all your dreams

Hush hush
smile my little boy
Hush hush
I bring you a toy
Hush hush
I guard all your dreams

It is magical to dance with you
On the white cloud
My dress made of dew drops
Glisters in the morning sun
A warm wind gently plays with my hair
And sunshine envelopes our bodies
As our souls finally meet

I want to make
a difference
the poet said
and began to write about
love and acceptance
understanding and caring
encouraging trust and support
and a commitment to help

making bread
helps me
to connect
with myself

kneading the dough
tells me
that persistence
is key
to achieving my goals

taking the bread
out of the oven
is a ritual that tells me
that all will be fine

red, blue, yellow
mixing colours
painting dreams
everything is possible
in my wonderland

her life
has become
meaningless
and full of
boredom

but maybe
her life
never had any
meaning and
excitement

looking
at her life
she notices
her constant
fear to engage

I listen
to his words
searching
for meaning
until
I realise
that his words
have lost
their meaning
for me

I love the taste
of strawberries
sweet and intense
like your kiss on
a hot summer day

I adore the colour
of strawberries
deep and strong
like your arms
around my waist

I enjoy the texture
of strawberries
firm and yet gentle
like your hands
on my skin

I can feel you
before you gently touch me
I sense your presence
even if you are not here
I listen to your voice
without you saying anything
I smell your skin
although you have already left
it is my memory of you
which makes me believe
that you are here

what a mess
she said

I like it
he smiled

how does one
get out of
this mess
she asks

I do not
know
I answer