My brother told you,
"I spent my whole life
Trying to get close to you."
You're not the kind of person
Who knows how to get close.
You hid so much of your pain.
Let yourself feel weak
Let yourself push others away
Let yourself be miserable.
The greatest disservice
You ever did me
Was never showing me
Who you were.
And now my brother
Has pushed you aside.
You deserve to be alone
But that's not what you need.
You raised me to help others
So I'll keep on helping you.
No matter how much I want
You to hurt.
No matter how much I want
You to die alone.
I can't.
I can't because
I choose love

how many more nights
will i
let the anger and
hypocrisy
living in my heart
guide my actions?

Seething and
Brimming with
The whisky
Out of a glass
Too full

blurry faces
emaciated bodies
The sound of waves smashing into your nose
The salt water
clearing out your ears
seaweed choking down your throat
The grit of the beach moving through each pore into your blood stream

clarity

dreams fading and
The anxiety shifting
from death to life
to kissing a person you just met and
reeling
from
The joy
and distaste of
The situation.
another night with a new person who could be her
or not
a bed too small to hold
you both
but too big to
be close enough

breathingsnoringsleepingcringingclawing
pushing
more and more
aware of each hand, muscle

The eyes go soft
The joy isn't there
it never was.
and
The allure of
The written word
doesn't feel
The way you thought
its incarnation would
feel

a fan

The whir
spins our breath
pushes like she pushes
strains like her breath
catching in her throat
The dogs know it's wrong
you don't face it
she worries she's
crazy
you've been crazy your
whole life and
The eyes are still
soft.

soft

dead

best to move on and start
again
break a new person's spirit
launch her
into a man she needs not
The one
who's there.
know the difference
show her
she matters
even to a stranger
grabbing at her body
grinding into her.

her smile
is more than a turn on
that high pitched squeak
of a laugh isn't to be shamed.

you're just as ticklish
as she

know
The difference
don't be afraid
even if she doesn't want
you
show her you've got
her
safe
and sound

do not date a girl
who writes.
she will internalize
everything,
carve poems
into your eyelashes
instead of
kissing them,

she will analyze you,
calculate age
from the rings
your coffee cup
leaves
instead of refilling it.

she will memorize
the way your
lips curl around steam,
but not that you
take it
two sugars,
no cream.

she will read your
palm instead of
holding it
against her chest.

she will not
blink
when you leave,
because she is
already
romanticizing it.

A tiny glass bulb done up in the air
A miniature sun that matches her hair

It's not that our hearts beat a samba
Neither of us knows the other too well
But she's one of those broken beauties
That are destined to drag me to hell

Not another, please not again
It's far too rough to want all these women

Still sitting in silence
Beneath this blooming bough
I think of a soul
I'm afraid to have found.

You know,
I've got these cat like
Reflexes
From spending
Long *** days
Lying next to you.

I long for you most when your face
Lies hidden in the darkness of the stars.
Our secrets meld together in the night
Without fear, without judgment, without shame.

We sit beside and fingers long to trace
The curve of your body, to know your scars,
From your heart, your body, your very plight.
With you, I'd create a new world, new name.

One fine and glorious day we'll interlace
And play each other like worn out guitars
Take the time to enjoy the other's sight.
In the darkness we'll both cry out, exclaim:

"Oh darling, I think you might have saved me
From a life alone; don't you agree?"